Until the Bitter End
by xXGemini14Xx
Summary: Rin and Len were childhood friends but they both grew up in different worlds; Rin, became the maid of none other than Miku- Len's soon to be wife, But as time passes Len finds it hard to deny his growing affections for Rin. NON-TWINCEST!
1. What Fate Denies

Just did this editing to fix the title so don't worry I didn't change a thing :))**  
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><p><strong>UNTIL THE BITTER END<strong>

**Chapter One:**

What Fate Denies

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><p><strong>E<strong>ven before we were born fate was truly cruel to us.

To be born of different status in life and to be torn apart at an early age…

That was our tragedy.

Will you ever say those words to me?

Or…

Will those be nothing more but childish dreams?

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><p><em>-Ten Years Later-<em>

_**~RIN~**_

"A carriage has arrived from Valice, Lady Miku." I said to my mistress and bowed to her side. She lifted her eyes to me and quickly let out a faint smile and asked.

"And who is on board Rin?"

"I do not know who is in it Lady Miku…" I replied nervously. Miku quickly rose from her chair and looked out the window. Her eyes quickly twinkled in the sunlight and turned to me with a smile of happiness.

"My fiancé has finally arrived." She quickly left the room as I sunk to the ground trembling.

So… He has finally returned. Not for me though but for someone else…

"Stupid me, of course he was for someone else. We were of different worlds were our love was never meant to bloom." I muttered to myself even if no one was here to listen. I was nothing more but a servant to a mistress whom his heart belonged to. Even if he showed kindness to me what was it to me? It could be nothing more but friendship and I didn't want that…

I wanted it to be more than that.

"Rin! It's been so long since I've last seen you, how are you faring here in Claridan Manor?" I turned to the source of the voice and found myself embraced tightly by a young boy about my age. I smiled faintly as he let go and looked at me with those deep blue eyes.

"Fine as it is Master Len…" I replied weakly. His brow creased with worry and placed his cool hands on my forehead.

"Are you sure Rin? You don't look like you're alright."

"I assure you I am fine." I protested and brushed his hands off. I glanced behind Len and saw Miku pout probably jealous at our closeness.

Yes…Her welfare should be more important to him than mine…

"Ahh~ Len-kun it's been so long and yet you're not even going to greet your beloved wife." Miku groaned childishly and quickly tackled Len behind playfully. Len laughed and quickly spun her to face him.

"Gomenasai Miku." Len grinned and kissed her passionately in the lips. It was painful to watch but I couldn't do anything. She had won long ago against me and this was proof of it.

"There happy?" Len replied and Miku nodded innocently. I quickly excused myself and the room before any of them could see the stinging tears that trickled down my face.

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><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

"Miku-cut it out Rei hates it when you do that." Len chided as his fiancée played with my hair. I brushed her hand aside but she'd always found a way to get back at me.

"But Rei's hair is so soft and fluffy…" Miku trailed off, lost in thought. I wonder why brother fell for a girl like her. So childish and blind to the political life bestowed upon her at such an age. Whatever his reason was so long as he was happy was fine by me.

"Why don't you play with me instead Miku?" Len begged hoping to get Miku off of my hair. I just grinned at my brother's helpless look and so whispered something to Miku's ear. Her eyes widened in excitement and quickly ran to topple Len off the chair.

"What did you tell her Rei?" Len asked and just shrugged. "It's a secret nii-sama." I replied before leaving them to their own enjoyments.

The garden was very much different from the one we had back in Valice.

The garden extended from the main building towards the conservatory at the end of the garden. And Miku with her frivolous attitude designed the garden to look like a labyrinth of roses rather than that of a typical garden.

The relief of it though was that the labyrinth wasn't so high so it was easy for me to spot the white pavilion at the centre of the labyrinth.

As I approached it, I saw seated inside the pavilion was a girl with blonde hair similar to that of nii-sama's, she was sitting with her back faced to me so she didn't feel my presence as I started to approach her.

"Lovely afternoon" I greeted her and she turned to face me, a surprised look on her face.

"Master Rei!" she exclaimed and started fixing her composure, "Whatever are you doing here?"

"Nothing much, just admiring the lovely flowers and the breezy afternoon, and you?"

"The same."

Awkward silence soon engulfed us it seemed that this young maiden had nothing interesting left to say.

Seeing as I had nothing else to do for the rest of the day I thought why not try to sit down and enjoy a leisure chat with this maiden.

This was not my usual behaviour but being in this boring over-sized mansion with no one interesting to talk to was enough to make anyone leave the place for good.

But brother had important matters to attend to here with his fiancée and since we only had one carriage I was left with no other option but to accompany him.

I sighed, why on earth did I even agree to come with my brother in the first place? Now I remember, Claridan was known for its ancient heritage and that sparked my amusement for the place.

But as soon as I arrived not once did I see anything that caught my attention.

Well, at least not for now.

"May I?" I asked gesturing to the vacant seat next to her.

She nodded shyly.

As soon as I was seated I heard Miku's laughter approaching us, her shrill laughter was impossible to miss.

"Miku, careful you'll graze yourself" I heard my brother's concerned voice.

I turned to look at the young maiden beside me and to my utter surprise she was gone.

Where on earth could she have run to?

"Ah, Rei" my brother said waving his hand to me as he and Miku came into view.

I nodded my head in reply, "What a beautiful garden you have here" I told Miku.

"As expected of Claridan" I added, while scanning the area looking for the blonde-haired maiden.

"Thank you for the compliment Rei-Rei chan" she giggled.

I cringed a bit at the nickname but nevertheless this was Miku we were talking about.

The sky started to darken; the once well-lit labyrinth was now covered in shadows everything was enveloped in darkness except for the path lighted with tall lamps leading us back to the mansion.

"I guess it's time for supper" brother said.

So we all headed back to the mansion my thoughts still wondering where the girl I saw before had gone.

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

As soon as I heard _her _laugh I knew _he _would be there.

Why is it that wherever she goes, he was there?

Mistress Miku was a kind and well- brought up woman so she would assure Len of his happiness she could offer him anything compared to me who has nothing else to give but my love.

I ran as far away as possible from the pavilion until I ended up at the conservatories front door, I would always come here when I feel troubled, something about gazing at the stars would always make my stress go away.

"Just be friends….All we got to do is just be friends" I sang the song I heard Lady Miku sing during her vocal lessons as I entered the conservatory.

I headed over to the balcony at the last floor and admired the stars with the telescope that was there.

Gemini was nowhere to be found tonight.

Just to make sure, I checked again but after another long hour of checking hoping it would appear I gave up and instead took a seat on the white swing.

Hours had passed but I just sat on the swing swinging myself absent-mindedly thinking almost about….Nothing at all.

"Gemini is nowhere to be found such a pity"

That was enough to snap me out of my trance.

That voice could only belong to _him_; in my 7 years of existence it was impossible to forget the voice that gave me happiness at the same time the cause of my pain and sorrow.

The only voice that could wake me up from my nightmares…The only one that could ever make me feel like my life was not as bad as it seems that no matter what happens he would always be there at the end smiling and telling me everything was alright.

"_Rin-chan, no matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!"_

Promises he made were still playing over and over inside my head.

"_Forever?" _I had asked that time.

"_Forever" _he replied.

I stopped swinging, the conservatory was very quiet after he spoke the cold night air was getting colder and colder the moonlight lighting the whole balcony enough for me to see his face.

His deep blue eyes that mirrored mine were the same as before; gentle and calm like the ocean.

"Good Evening….Master Len"

"Oh please, stop with the formalities Rin-chan I would rather prefer it if you simply just call me 'Len' like before"

"You know I cannot do that I am only a maid wherein you are my master."

He laughed, "When have you gotten so melodramatic Rin?"

He took a seat beside me I glanced secretly at him admiring every inch.

He indeed had gotten taller, manlier and lovelier than ever.

My heart stung, he belonged to someone else so I should just stop with my wild fantasies and never ending illusions that he would-, in his whole life stop to look at me.

"What are you doing here at this hour of the night?" I asked.

"I should be asking you the same."

"I came for the stars" I answered pointing at the now starless sky, "But they are gone now."

"And you?" I added.

"Just walking around and ended up here" he grinned.

"How is the Mistress doing?" I asked the pain in my heart hurting more and more.

"Cheerful and playful as ever" he said with so much love in his eyes that it was very unbearable for me to watch.

"I bless you with eternal happiness" Lies, filled my mouth.

"Arigatou Rin-chan, you should also find a man someday someone who will love and cherish you" how oblivious he was that each word he said were like a rose's thorn piercing my heart.

"I do have someone, but he already has someone else" I smiled bitterly.

"Really? Who is it then?" he asked curiously.

How could I ever tell him that he was the man I was talking about?

"It's a secret"

"How unfair of you" he pouted adorably.

"Neh, Len"

"Hmmm….?"

"Do you remember that promise you told me when we were young?"

"Whatever do you mean? What promise?"

That was enough to make the tears appear on my eyes but I forced myself not to cry, the only thing reassuring me to move on from my past for years was now shattered with a few words.

But I could not blame him that promise was made years ago so it wasn't impossible to forget I was the only one hallucinating.

"Ah, nothing" were the only words I could utter.

"Len I have to dismiss myself now" I said getting up and waited for his reply.

"Of course, Goodnight Rin…."

As I walked farther away from the conservatory little by little the tears I controlled a while back started rolling down my eyes.

It hurts…So much.

I love him very much, make a deal with the devil himself if I had to.

But how could I? If the love I so much wanted was never there to begin with.

Len, how I would give up anything for you…..

Anything….

Not knowing it, I fell asleep on the grassy terrain of the labyrinth.

_The boy smiled at me his eyes calm and gentle like the ocean._

"_Neh, Rin-chan, no matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!"_

"_Forever?" the short-blonde haired girl asked._

"_Forever" the boy said with a smile._

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><p><strong>PREVIEW: <strong>

**CHAPTER TWO: Mistakes**

"Rin! What on heavens where you thinking!" Len exclaimed angrily I never saw him so angry before.

I stared not able to move on the large cabinet that fell and the broken glasses and plates on the floor while Miku was severely bleeding.

She tried to save me….

She tried to save me…

"QUICKLY GET SOME HELP!" Len screamed at the top of his lungs.

I quickly fumbled to the telephone panicking and started pressing the wrong numbers, Len grabbed the phone with so much force causing me to fall over.

"Aish, why can't a maid like you do anything right!"

"I am terribly sorry!" I apologized again and again hoping he would understand.

He stared at me coldly everything that I loved about him suddenly disappearing "Get away from my sight right now!"

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><p>My first VOCALOID fanfic I pictured it in olden times so the language is a bit different.<p>

Never fear guys this will end as a RinXLen I would like to thank the songs Kokoro and Servant of Evil for some reason they inspired me to write this fanfic.

In this story all of them are 14 years old, hey in olden times having a fiancée at an early age was allowed.

Anyways please REVIEW and REVIEW I'll update once I get 10 reviews MWAHAHA!

Sorry If there are any grammar mistakes!

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><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID and the characters used I only own the names of the places used like Claridan and Valice, pretty neat names if I say so myself.

**-xXKingdomHeartsBirthbySleepXx-**


	2. Mistakes

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters at all! I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners.

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><p><strong>Chapter Two:<br>**

Mistakes

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"Here take these and use it to open the shed." The head maid said as she handed me a gold key. I nodded in reply and hastily left the room.

A ball was to be held two nights from now in honor of Mistress Miku and Master Len's engagement. It was to be expected by Miku…Always wanting to have a ball for every occasion. I sighed to myself as I turned to the corner. How soon time flies, soon they'd be wed and I'd lose Len forever…

"Look out miss!" I quickly snapped out from my daydreaming and slipped from stairs. A force quickly caught me by the arm and spun me into a quick embrace. I stared up to see that my savior was Master Rei eyeing me, partly surprised himself.

"Master Rei!" I quickly unlaced myself from his embrace and bowed in apology. "So we met again ummm… your name?" He asked.

"Oh I am Rin, Master Rei." I quickly replied. He chuckled a bit and eyed with those gold eyes almost similar to that of Len's blue ones. "Please no need for the formalities, call me as my brother does…Rei-kun."

"Reiii-ku-un." I tried to pronounce calmly. He laughed again making me blush scarlet.

Of all the people I had to meet why did it have to be him?

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><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

To see her blush that way makes her so adorable. Why did brother never think of falling for a girl like her?

"I must be off now Master Rei…I mean Rei-kun!" She replied nearly shouting in surprise for forgetting to call me Rei-kun.

"And where to Rin-chan?" I asked managing to hold back the laughter trying to escape my lips.

"T-to the shed to g-get the tables out into the garden." She stuttered. I studied her for a moment, which made her flinch and I grinned.

"Very well, we'll go there together." I answered

The shed pretty much looked like a house except for the fact that it had no windows and only a huge door. Rin quickly produced a gold key and started unlocking it. I then helped her slide the door open and went in.

"Careful Rei-kun the things here were just forcibly stuffed so we shall never know if any of them were to loose holding." Rin said while she opened the main switch. The entire shed was enveloped in light and here I saw the truth in what Rin had said. The things truly were not arranged well that one wrong move could send all the things falling under you.

"Rei-kun this way…" Rin shouted from the further end. I quickly ran to her side, careful to avoid tripping on the rolled carpets dumped on the floor. As I tried to regain my composure I saw littered in front of us tables and chairs all covered in dust.

"And how do we plan to get these out then Rin?"

"Well… we shall start with the chairs and then think up on a way to get the tables out."

"Okay then I'll take the chairs stacked there in the middle and you take the ones there in the right." I said while rolling my sleeves up. Rin nodded to the idea and started pulling the chairs on the right towards the small passage that led back to the entrance. I then copied what she did and started to push the chairs out.

This is going to be a very tiring day…

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><p>"Well that's all of the chairs Rin…" I mustered to say as I collapsed to the ground. Rin ran to my side and sat next to me looking at me to see if I was alright.<p>

"I'm fine you needn't worry about me Rin." I replied managing to pull off a faint smile, she sighed and quickly pulled out a napkin from her apron. "Here you have dirt all over your face." She started wiping my face which made me flinch. I wonder why I feel so uncomfortable. She was just simply wiping the dirt off my face right?

"Are you alright Master Rei?" She reverted back to calling me master which made me feel a bit upset. "Neh Rin…" I said and before she could respond, I quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her face close to mine. "W-what are you d-doing Master-," I quickly placed my finger to her lips which silenced her.

"Remember Rin its _Rei-kun_ alright not Master Rei…Next time you forget I'll make sure you deserve a decent punishment." I whispered slyly to her ear. She brushed my hand away and pushed me aside. "What on earth were you thinking Master Rei? Have you no sense of being a gentleman at all!" Rin shouted angrily and stormed off into the shed. I grinned at her figure as it pushed aside some stuff and went deeper into the shed.

It seems she's just asked for it too early…

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

From a savior to a monster. He is nothing like Master Len at all! Where did he learn such manners?

"_Remember Rin its Rei-kun alright not Master Rei…Next time you forget I'll make sure you deserve a decent punishment." _His words echoed in my head. Wait? Didn't I just address him as Master Rei a while ago! T-hen that means…

"Rin-chan you left me." I cringed and carefully turned behind me to find Master Rei giving me a weird smile…I gulped and thought of a way on how to get out of this mess. "Oh Rei-kun…I'm sorry about leav-,"

"So you decide to call me Rei-kun now." He cut me off and slammed me to a wall. I blushed scarlet as his eyes directly stared into mine. His face was too close it made my heart beat so loud that I was sure he could hear it. He looked so much like Master Len which made my heart race even faster.

"Rei-Rei-kun!" Miku's voice echoed outside the garden. Rei flinched at the sound of his name called that way and turned out into the garden. "It seems Miku saved you this time Rin-chan." He murmured before releasing me and running off. I sat on the ground trying to calm my beating heart. For once I couldn't help but thank Mistress Miku for saving me. I tried once again to regain my composure and got finally got up and went off to finish my job.

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><p>"You're the best Rin-chan!" Miku shouted gleefully. The ballroom was finally finished and decorated for the ball two nights from now. Only the foods and the tableware were left to be prepared for tomorrow but the rest were already done, waiting for Miku's approval which to the relief of everybody, was very much accepted by Miku.<p>

"No…Really Mistress Miku I had a lot of help for it to be this beautiful." I replied but she was absorbed about the design she might not have heard me.

"Don't be modest Rin you deserved it." Len said making me blush. He's so close to me yet still so far to reach. For once can he just look at me and notice my feelings.

"No really Master Len I don't deserve it." I replied trying to shake away those useless thoughts.

"Whatever you say Rin but for me I tell you, you deserve it." Len smiled and afterwards walked to where Miku was and soon both were so absorbed that neither of them looked back as I left the ballroom half-contented.

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><p>I was busy cleaning the silverware when Mistress Miku entered the room. She then ran to my side with a giddy look on her face. I stopped on what I was doing and looked up to her.<p>

"Yes Mistress Miku?" I asked thinking she might need me for something. She then walked to the window and looked outside, admiring the view and then answered me.

"Oh Rin I feel so happy I can't stop moving." She giggled and then got up and started pacing the room back and forth. I smiled back at her and then started to clean the silverwares again.

"It's to be expected Mistress since your engaged to the person you love."

"If only I could share you some of my happiness just to make me calm down." Miku sighed dreamily. I giggled at her and then put the wares in the tray and got up. "Well when you can't take it then come and give them to me." Miku grinned at my remark and nodded.

"Sure why not Rin."

Miku sat across from me as while I was fixing the wares on the topmost shelf, trying to find the best ones to use for the ball. I then spotted a box of new spoons at the end and tried to reach for it. If only my hands weren't so short then I might be able to reach them. I tried to extend my arm further trying to get a hold on it.

"Rin look out!" Miku shouted as I lost my footing on the stool and fell, pulling the cabinet long with me.

"AAH!" I shouted as I fell. I then suddenly felt as if I was pushed aside and slammed to the floor. The smashing of plates and the clinking of metal was heard, I then opened my eyes and noticed I was barely harmed and saw that I was a bit too far from where I fell which was very odd. I looked around and saw to my horror Mistress Miku unconscious and severely bleeding on the floor. The cabinet nearly crushing her if it hadn't been for the footstool that stopped it.

"Mistress Miku!" I shouted as I carefully got her out. She was breathing heavily and the blood wouldn't stop coming out. What have I done? She's dying…Trying to save me…Why? Why? It should have been me.

"What on earth was that noi-," Len quickly opened the door and was cut short when he saw Miku on my arms bleeding heavily. "Master L-Len I-I." I tried to explain what happened and then I saw the look on his face so terrifying it made me shiver.

"Rin! What on heavens where you thinking!" Len exclaimed angrily. I never saw him so angry before it made me so scared to see him so different.

I stared not able to move on the large cabinet that fell and the broken glasses and plates on the floor while Miku was severely bleeding on my lap.

She tried to save me….

She tried to save me…

"QUICKLY GET SOME HELP!" Len screamed at the top of his lungs.

I quickly fumbled to the phone, panicking, and started typing the wrong numbers; Len grabbed the phone with so much force causing me to fall over.

"Aish, why can't a maid like you do anything right!"

"I am terribly sorry!" I apologized again and again hoping he would understand.

He stared at me coldly everything that I loved about him suddenly disappearing "Get away from my sight right now!"

"M-Master Len…"

"NOW!" He shouted and I ran out of the room barely able to control the tears that escaped my eyes.

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><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

I watched brother carry Miku into the carriage and quickly sped off. What on earth happened to Miku! My brother eyed me so coldly and said nothing as he helped the physician wrap Miku in bandages and carry her into the carriage. I've never seen him so mad like that…

For once he looked so frightening it made me scared.

I watched the carriage until it vanished into the woods and went back in the house. The entire household was in an uproar it was difficult to move around. I tried escaping from them all and managed to make it out into the garden. Making my way around the maze, I easily reached the centre and sighed in relief when I could hear no more of the noisy sounds back in the manor. I then sat on the spot where I saw Rin for the first time and pondered to myself of what had become of Miku.

"Why! If only she didn't save me then Len wouldn't be so mad…Why did she save me?" I heard the voice cry out. I followed its source and found Rin sitting under a tree, her eyes covered by her hands but it was obvious she was crying.

"Rin?" She cringed when she heard my voice and looked up. "Oh Rei it's you…" She answered weakly. I decided to sit next to her but she moved farther from me. "Rei please…Just stay away from me." Rin begged. I shook my head and tried to touch her but she nudged her shoulder before I could.

"Rin what's wrong? You don't look fine." I asked again, getting worried. Why was she avoiding me? Had I done anything wrong to upset her and if it's about a while back that was only a joke…What did I do wrong.

"What do I do Rei? Master Len now hates me for good! I am a murderer…I hurt Mistress Miku, tell me Rei what do I do?" Rin cried out. I stared at her dumbfounded, could it be that Miku was harmed by Rin? And in doing so brother hated her so much? I looked at Rin, her blue eyes covered in tears and her face was frightened and pale. She was scared and I didn't know what to do.

"I-I'm sorry Rin but I'll do what I can to help." I held her hands that were now pale and cold. Rin studied me for a bit and nodded reluctantly as I took her inside the manor.

I'll do what it I can…for her sake I would.

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><p><strong>PREVIEW:<strong>

**CHAPTER THREE: The End to a Dream**

I stood in front of him and for the first time no words were exchanged between us. He accused me of a killer…a murderer of his dreams.

"First light of day you must be ready to leave." I flinched when he said those words. I knew I wouldn't last another day after what I've done so this event was unavoidable. I bowed in reply making sure to look down so that he didn't see me cry.

As if he'd care anyway.

I left the room without so much as a good-bye and climbed up the stairs to my room. My last day as a maid ends today. This will be the last I'll meet Mistress Miku, Rei-kun and most especially Len.

Dreams will forever be that…Just dreams.

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><p>Well there you go as promised; I'd update it when I get ten reviews. Hope you love this tale and R&amp;R from time to time . Again enjoy this story!<p>

**-xXKingdomHeartsBirthbySleepXx-**


	3. The End to a Dream

Chapter 3!

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><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners.

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><p><strong>Chapter Three:<br>**

The End to a Dream

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><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

"At least until she finds another job." I begged brother but he refused to hear me out. We were alone in the hospital ward, only the sound of Miku's breathing broke the silence that tried to suffocate us. Nii-sama sat by Miku's bed, his eyes covered by his hand while the other held on to her hand.

"For the last time Rei please…Enough!" I rooted myself to the ground while Nii-sama threw wave after wave of curses at me. I promised Rin I'd do what I can to help her and to be able to do that I had to face brother no matter what. Somehow it was odd that I wanted to help her so much, we only met a few days ago and yet here I was risking my brother's trust for her…

"Ughnnn…" Miku groaned and opened her eyes weakly. Brother placed his hand on her forehead and smiled. "Oh Miku I'm so glad you're alright." He kissed her lightly on the cheek and waited for her to reply.

"Len? Wh-where am I?" Miku's eyes scanned the room while brother explained to her all the events that happened. The moment he got to Rin's part about firing her, Miku sighed and looked at him sadly.

"Isn't that a bit cruel? It was my fault anyways and she doesn't deserve that kind of treatment." Brother protested of this but Miku shook her head. "Give her a day before you fire her on the spot Len…She's your friend at least show some compassion."

"She _used _to be my friend Miku and how can you expect me to show compassion to the woman who had you nearly killed." Brother replied as he tried to suppress his anger when he said those words. "Brother p-please at least a day." I tried to add; a bit confident Miku might help me in this. Brother glared at me and then turned to Miku probably hoping she'd side with him.

"She is under my house Len and I have every right to do what I please with her so with that I shall give her at least a day to stay." I was surprised by Miku's reply. To think she had become mature after being knocked on the head by plates. Brother finally surrendered and nodded.

"Very well but only for a day and after that then she is to leave the Manor."

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I frowned when Rei told me his "good" news. They had just come home from the ward a day too early but Mistress Miku persisted that she was fine and needed no more coddling. Of all of them only Rei went to greet me.

I was allowed, according to him, a day to work before I leave. Rei went as far as this to help me but why am I not so happy about it. What am I so afraid of? The door to my room opened and I turned to find Cheska coming in. She was to be the new maid that would replace me starting tomorrow. I was not mad at her for taking my place, she was just chosen at the wrong time.

"Yes Cheska?" The young maid approached me warily; probably afraid I might do something awful to her. I did my best to make the atmosphere feel comfortable to Cheska but I guess the face I kept on making just made things harder for the both of us.

"M-Master L-Len wishes for your audience Ms Rin. He said to meet him at the spot where Gemini can be seen." I quickly stood up, flabbergasted at what she had told me. Len…What on earth is on your mind right now? Do you really hate me for this mistake or…or maybe you're considering whether your action is really right or wrong.

"Thank you Cheska, I'll be taking my leave now." I then left the room without waiting for a reply. Just clinging to a false hope seemed so dangerous but what else could I do.

This was the only thing that has kept me from tearing my own self apart.

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><p>I stood in front of the conservatory's doors. Before I stood in front of these doors because I wanted to go in and admire the stars but today… I was afraid to enter it because I knew that Gemini wasn't here in broad daylight and because I had come for <em>him<em> and not the stars. I carefully opened the door, hoping it wouldn't make any sound, but then again luck was never on my side and so the door gave off a loud creaking sound that echoed throughout the room. I then mustered all my strength and finally ascended the steps.

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><p>"So you've decided to come, Rin." He no longer referred to me as Rin-chan which stung me a bit. But it was to be expected. I remained quiet, thinking that so long as I made no retorts against him then my leave in this manor will be easily forgotten completely. He finally looked away from the telescope and looked at me straight in the eye. His eyes no longer mirrored mine, the cheerful humour in them were now replaced by hate and contempt.<p>

"Do you know why I've asked for your audience Rin?" He asked and I only nodded my head. He turned away from me and faced the balcony.

"You were always the one with many things to say Rin." He seemed a bit upset of my silence. I tried to control what I wanted to say but somehow they just tumbled right out of my mouth.

"There is nothing left to say Master Len. What's done is done and I cannot undo it…My apologies cannot reach you so what else do you wish for me to say?" Len turned to face me again which made me quickly look down. He quickly walked towards me and forcefully lifted my head to face him.

"How can you expect me to forgive you when you had her nearly killed?" He shouted angrily. I shoved him away from me and tried to stand my ground as I vainly fought the stinging tears that now trickled down my eyes.

"Then this conversation is going nowhere Len, Pray tell me what you truly want to say and let it be over with!"

"Our friendship is over Rin! Speak to me again in that kind of manner and this time I'll make sure you deserve punishment." Len angrily replied. He no longer cared if I cried in front of him, all those memories we shared were easily erased along with the tears I could no longer control to stop.

"Our friendship was long gone the moment you decided to send me out of this house Len and I hate you for it, memories…countless memories we shared were nothing but a waste of our time and it irks me! Of all people…it had to be you! Why? I hate you so much Len!" I cried out taking him by surprise. I did not mean for him to hear it but somehow deep in my heart it was for the best. It was best for him to be forgotten forever.

"Rin…I-," I didn't waste any more time to hear his useless words and bowed. "Forgive me for my transgressions Master Len, I must take my leave now…" I sped out of the conservatory just before I heard the shattering of glass.

It was over and there was no point in going back…

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

"I thank you for managing to let me stay here for another day Rei, I never expected you'd help me but I'm sorry…" Rin cried as she sat on her bed as I watched her helplessly. There was never a time I could make her smile. And just when I thought I was actually doing her a favour…I was just making it worse for her.

"I'm sorry Rin, truly I am."

"I believe you Rei and I'm sorry for always making you worry about me." I ruffled Rin's hair, much to her annoyance but I didn't care. "I forgive you Rin, after all that's what friends are for." I grinned and then pulled out a white ribbon and tied it on her head.

"A gift to cheer you up, so stop crying and let me see you smile." Rin put up a faint smile but to me that wasn't enough. I never want to see her cry anymore. "Not enough Rin, you can smile better than that."

"Rei I'm in no mood for this." Rin complained. At least she stopped crying, a smile formed from my lips and I sat next to her.

"If you won't smile then I have other ways to force you!" I tackled her down and started tickling her. Her laughter echoed in the room along with mine and soon we collapsed to the ground panting for air.

"That was fun wasn't it Rin, So won't you smile now?" She remained silent for a minute but I could see a smile creeping from her lips.

"Fine Rei-kun I give up." And there we were laughing the whole day, drowning away her sorrows in temporary happiness.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I looked out of the window and saw the sun setting.

After Rei left, it was the first time I felt so alone and upset. The thought of Len always there by my side was enough to wash this away, but after the incident, those feelings were completely erased from me. I untied the ribbon Rei gave me and placed it on my desk. I owe everything to Rei and it made me feel guilty accepting this after what I told him. Every time I was upset it was always Len who made me feel happy but after this, it was Rei who came by and helped me out. I never really knew Rei's intentions on why he'd help me; I only knew that he didn't do it because of Len being my childhood friend.

It starts to make me wonder what Rei's thinking right now.

The door to my room opened and this time it was the head maid who came in. She looked at me painfully as if she lost a child.

"Rin, Master Len wishes to see you in his study room." I stood up weakly, afraid of what was in store for me if Len and I were to meet again. If it was punishment for my previous acts against him then I must accept it, after all, we were no longer friends. The bonds that held us together were easily cut off that tying it again was impossible. I nodded in reply and excused myself as I made my way to the study room.

* * *

><p>I stood in front of him and for the first time no words were exchanged between us. He accused me of a killer…a murderer of his dreams.<p>

"First light of day you must be ready to leave." I flinched when he said those words. I knew I wouldn't last another day after what I've done so this event was unavoidable. I bowed in reply making sure to look down so that he didn't see me cry.

As if he'd care anyway.

I left the room without so much as a good-bye and climbed up the stairs to my room. My last day as a maid ends today. This will be the last I'll meet Mistress Miku, Rei-kun and most especially Len.

Dreams will forever be that…Just dreams.

I tried to hate him but it was impossible. Just saying those things a while ago seemed so easy but trying to do them just made me suffer and I couldn't help but cry. It was easy to say to him I hated him because my heart wanted it to be told but then after a while, all those emotions were replaced with regret. I lay on my bed hoping sleep would cure me.

If it couldn't then I beg to never wake up again…

* * *

><p>"Thank you for your kind hospitality towards me." I bowed. Miku hugged me tightly and raised my head to look at her.<p>

"Oh Rin if I could I would make you stay but…Len had my father and my mother's side, I-I-," She started to cry. I wiped the tears off her eyes and hugged her back. If Len was happy, I was happy. It was alright if he would forget me that to me was for the best. He had Miku for a wife and a caring brother like Rei. He wouldn't need me anymore. I was right, hating him was impossible; even if he hated me I could never bring myself to hate him back. I loved him too much for hatred to take control.

"Don't forget to call if you need help Rin." Rei said as Miku let go of me. I shook my head in reply and handed him back the ribbon.

"Rei thank you but I can manage; you needn't look after me all the time." Rei reluctantly took the ribbon and looked at it for a long time. He finally looked back at me and suddenly I was embraced tightly by Rei.

"Rin…Onegai, take it back- this is my gift for you and for no one else." I hugged him back and nodded. "…Fine I'll take it Rei and again thank you." It took him for a long time to let go and when he did he was smiling back at me painfully. I didn't want to cry but with them looking at me like this… I couldn't help it. I was leaving the place I learned to call home and I would never see the people who I now called family ever again. Tears once again overflowed and I cried so much I couldn't stop. I wanted to let it all out, the pain that I refused to show came out of me and it made it more difficult for me to stop. I hugged them both again for the last time before I entered the coach. Taking my things I was about to get in when I looked back at the manor and found Len looking out the window. He always went out to say good-bye when I went somewhere but right now he only glanced at me from the windows as if I was just another maid being sent away. I mouthed a few words to him and waved good-bye as I ascended the coach.

The door was closed and I looked back at the manor's window but Len was already gone.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

She was leaving for good.

I thought it best for Miku's sake but why am I regretting it? I looked out the window as I watched Rin enter the coach. Somehow she knew I was watching her and she quickly turned to face me. She had already stopped crying but the look in her eyes showed nothing but hazy emotions as if she was drained of all the happiness. I couldn't help but feel guilty. I was a terrible friend to Rin, I loved Miku but losing a friend like Rin made me feel a bit incomplete.

"_What's done is done and I cannot undo it…My apologies cannot reach you so what else do you wish for me to say" _Rin's words echoed through my mind. It was true; the apologies she made could not reach me. I was so mad at her it blinded my sense of thinking. What's done is done…And I couldn't undo it. Rin looked at me for a long time and then mouthed something that made me even more regret.

"Aishiteru Len-kun."

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><p>This chapter made me cry, it showed too much emotion on Rin's side I will stop making Previews so that the next chapter will be a surprise Thank you for all the support you have been giving in this fanfic It makes me very happy in a weird, cheesy way.<p>

I will update once I get **35 reviews** MWAHAHAHA!

Till we meet again!

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	4. The Inevitable Meeting of Two Souls

**Disclaimer**: I do not own VOCALOID :)

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><p><strong>Chapter Four:<br>**

The Inevitable Meeting of Two Souls

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I didn't know where else to go.

The coach left me here in town and quickly sped off back to the manor. Mistress Miku left me with only a meagre sum of money, enough for food and water that would last for two days. I had to find another job soon before I ran out of money. But where could I work in? Len was the one who took me to work for Mistress Miku so finding a job by myself would be a new experience for me. It was a mistake to rely on Len all the time. My complete reliance on him made me unable to make my own decisions; always relying on him for the right advice was a bad idea.

"Flowers! Beautiful flowers for sale!" A lady shouted energetically while the man next to her was giving flowers to every person that passed by. The man's blue eyes suddenly locked with mine and then as if by instinct he left the woman and ran to me. He brought with him a blue-white flower with yellow markings on it. He then handed it to me and smiled.

"Please take it, the name of the flower is Euphrasia and it means to "Cheer Up" don't wallow in the sadness miss. Be optimistic and try your best to look into a good future." I took the flower and watched as the man ran back to the woman and then started giving away more flowers to the people. I caressed the flowers petals with my finger and walked back towards the pair as they started to open their shop.

"Oh so you came back miss? Care to buy another bunch of Euphrasia, I can tell you're finally lightening up." The man grinned as I walked inside the shop. The shop smelled of fresh flowers and the colour was so light and beautiful it made me easily feel at home. The man sat next to the woman by the counter, both holding a bouquet of flowers ordered by a couple. The woman turned to me and smiled as well.

"So Kaito you've managed to attract another customer."

"Oh no, I came by here of my own free will." I replied and the man named Kaito laughed.

"See Meiko! I would never use my charms to cheat on you." Meiko hit him on the head with a bunch of flowers. It didn't hurt the man but the sight of him covered in flowers made everyone in the shop laugh.

"So what did you come here for then miss?" Meiko asked me. I did come here of my own free will but I really don't know why came here. I could only stare at her for a long time. And just as if reading my mind, Kaito stood up from his spot and looked at Meiko.

"She must be looking for a job Meiko." Meiko turned to me waiting for an answer.

"Umm… I really am looking for a job. I'm good at growing flowers so I can help you with caring for them while you mind the shop. I was also a maid once so I have a huge experience when it comes to cleaning up." I blurted out. I wasn't expecting an easy yes from them. It was a good experience to be rejected once; it made you more determined at what you did. Meiko and Kaito looked at each other and then laughed loudly, surprising the customers.

"Fine you're hired! Welcome to the Flowers of Hope." I smiled and nodded in reply.

"Arigatou Gozaimasu! I'm Rin a pleasure to meet you." A ray of hope was given to me and I seized it. For the first time, I can finally walk towards a better future.

I was easily accepted by kind strangers I can now call my new family.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~MIKU~<strong>_

It seemed cruel of Len to fire Rin.

If only mother and father did not side with him then maybe Rin would still be here. I regretted that Rin had to leave; she was one of my best maids and one of my best friends.

"Mistress Miku…Master Len, tea is served." Cheska placed the tray of jasmine tea before taking her leave. I drank the tea but it was missing something…

"Rin always made the best tea for me; Cheska could never replace her when it came to tea-making." I complained as I placed the cup back on the table. Len finished his tea and returned the cup on the table.

"Well you have to start getting used to Cheska's cooking then."

"How can you be so cruel Len? Rin was your childhood friend and you just set her aside as if she was someone else." I replied angrily. Len looked at me a bit surprised and then looked away as if embarrassed of his actions.

"How can you expect me to forgive someone who almost killed you? I just couldn't bear the thought of losing you Miku. I thought it best for your sake."

"For my sake Len or for yours? She would never hurt anyone Len, she was just doing her job and it just happened. You can't expect her to rewind time and prevent it." I pointed out which made Len quiet. I hoped for Len to see reason. To see that it was a mistake to cut off such a great bond. The look on Rin's face on the day she left made me realize she deserved to be forgiven.

She was not only Len's friend but mine as well.

"What's done is done Miku…Even if you make your parents see reason and forgive her, you'll never be able to get me to see it. I would never risk it, losing you is like losing half of my soul. I'm sorry Miku but my decision is final." Len got up and left me to my thoughts. Persuading him was hard but I refused to give up. He will see that I was right.

* * *

><p><em>-Flashback-<em>

"_Miku this here is the son of Valice's Duke, his name is Len and I hope you two become great friends." Father nudged the blonde-haired boy forward. It was love at first sight. The moment father introduced him; I knew he was the Prince of my dreams. _

"_Neh~ Len tell me is it beautiful there in Valice?" I asked but Len was so busy drawing on his sketchpad that he could only nod in reply. I pouted and grabbed the sketch pad from him. I always hated it when someone ignored me. I was always pampered that the slight act of ignoring me would make me irritated._

"_Hey! I was drawing." He tried to get the pad back but my hands were quick._

"_Well come and get it!" I then took off. I was always fast at running and by the looks of it; Len was not that good in running. He was panting even if we've only ran for about ten minutes but the determination in his eyes showed he refused to give up. I decided to climb a tree and hide there while Len was down below calling for my name._

"_Onegai Miku! Give it back." Len cried out which made me curious. I wonder why he wanted this back so much. I opened the pad and saw a drawing of a young girl grinning while hugging a cat. I flipped the page and again it was the same girl, this time she was seated by the window sill of house. All the pages were pictures of her, whether she was happy, sad or annoyed. It made me jealous that this girl was in every page of Len's pad. Was she truly this important to him?_

"_There you are! Give it back Miku." I looked down and found Len trying to climb the tree. I panicked and suddenly I lost balance. I tried to grip for the branch but the branch was too small it easily broke. I closed my eyes waiting for death when suddenly I felt myself land on something._

"_Ow…" I opened my eyes and I saw that I landed on Len's back. Did he just save me? It made me feel guilty now about stealing his pad. I then helped him up and gave him back the pad. He eyed cautiously for a minute but I assured him that he had nothing to worry about._

"_I owe you my life Len so to return the favour you can have it back." _

"_What did you see?" He asked when he took it from me. I just shrugged and said about the drawing of the girl. Len then sat below the tree while I sat next to him and pointed at the portrait of the girl when Len opened his pad._

"_Who is she Len?" I asked back curiously. Len adjusted the fringes of the girl's bangs and then turned to me as he closed the pad._

"_A childhood friend of mine." _

"_What's her name?" I asked again. So Len had a childhood friend then. I wonder what she's like. Is she really that important to have one whole sketch pad dedicated to her?_

"_Her name is Rin. She was an orphan my father took in during one of his trips. She's pretty much like a sister to me." I sighed in relief. So he only considered her a sister then. It made me feel reassured then that Len didn't think of her as more than that. But just to be sure I wanted to meet her._

"_When the time comes Len, would you let me meet this Rin then?" Len grinned and nodded. _

"_I'm sure she'd love to meet you Miku! You're both rowdy so you'll get along very well." I hit Len on the head and laughed. "We'll make sure then that you'll get punished for mocking us." I then stuck out my tongue and ran again with Len chasing me._

_Rin huh? I wonder if we'd get along well._

_-End-_

* * *

><p>I giggled at the thought. Those times I was always jealous when Len talked of no one else but Rin. I hated her but when we met personally I started to think of her more of a friend than a rival. It touched me that Len loved me this much but if it was in expense of Rin's happiness it only made me feel rotten inside.<p>

This was not the kind of happiness I wanted.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"This one should be planted exactly on the 3rd day of spring; if you plant them too early or too late then they won't grow tall enough by the time summer comes." Meiko explained while she handed me the packet of seeds which I placed in the pocket of my apron. It was my first day working for Meiko and Kaito and I was determined to impress them.

"I'll leave you to tend to the Jasmines while I go back to the shop and make sure Kaito's selling and not stalling." I nodded in reply as Meiko left the greenhouse. It may be smaller than the conservatory back in the manor but the flowers here were of more variety than those back at the manor. It was true that I missed the times when Miku would always teach me how to tend the flowers in the conservatory and how she'd cut off some and give them to Len. I gave him a bouquet of Chrysanthemum once since it said in the book that it meant as a sign that he was a wonderful friend to me. Len only smiled as he accepted them. I was happy at the thought but I knew he loved the flowers Miku gave him rather than mine. If Len could never love my flowers more than Miku's then why not let other people love them instead.

"_When did I make a mistake? If I turned back time could it possibly have a different result? I've already started thinking about it._.." I was busy singing when suddenly the sound of pots shattering echoed in the conservatory making me stop.

"Ouch!" I went to the source of the noise and found a boy covered in soil. He had snow white hair and both his eyes didn't have the same colour, one was green while the other was light blue. I wonder how this boy ended up here. Meiko never mentioned another person living with them. The boy seemed too old to be their son, so who could he be.

"Um… Who are you?" I asked. The boy turned to face me with a quizzical look on his face.

"I should be asking you that question. Since this conservatory belongs to my sister."

"So Meiko is your sister then? I don't actually see the resemblance." I replied. Meiko never mentioned a brother to me. Maybe she was too busy to tell me. The boy scowled at my comment and got up.

"We may not look alike but she's my sister no matter what you say. Besides what are you even doing here?"

"Well I was hired about a day ago to care for the plants." I replied, trying to act polite. The boy looked at me doubtfully.

"Really now? Well then if my sister hired you then you should at least know the name of her brother."

"Which is?" I asked and the boy bowed and smiled.

"Piko…My name is Piko."

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><p>HIYA! I just didn't check my account for a day or two and when I did I was surprised to see 53 reviews! So I had to update<p>

Till we meet again!

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	5. Resurfaced Memories

Chapter 5 is out!

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><p><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I do not own VOCALOID!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Five:<br>**

Resurfaced Memories

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><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

I was not expecting her to be here in town.

As planned the ball was to continue regardless of the physician's pleas to have it postponed till fall. Miku wanted it to be on summer, exactly five days before her birthday. The moment she has is set there was no other way to change her mind. We decided to buy the flowers since the ones Rin prepared withered.

"There that's the shop I told you about." Miku pointed to a shop named Flowers of Hope. Many people crowded the shop making it difficult to enter but because Miku was renowned here in town, the people quickly made a path for us.

"Hello and what brings the Duke's daughter here to our humble shop?" The brown-haired woman greeted. Miku bowed as well and started asking the woman of the flowers they have in stock. A man with blue hair stepped forward and bowed in front of us.

"That depends madam, for what festivity will it be used in?"

"A ball, to celebrate an engagement." Miku simply replied. The man nodded and asked us to follow him into the back of the shop.

* * *

><p>"What about these Casablanca Lilies? They mean celebration and happy occasions." Miku shook her head and placed it back on the rack. The man sighed and started to search again for other flowers. Miku wanted our occasion to be worth the memory so it was to be expected if she went all out with the decorations.<p>

"What about these peonies Miku? I hear they mean happy marriage and happy life?" I asked as I handed the flowers to Miku. She smiled and handed it to the man. "Fine I'll take it since you chose it Len." I sighed in relief. Finally, the faster we ready the flowers the earlier we can get home.

* * *

><p>"So you ordered a bunch of peonies and a mixed colour of pink and white roses?" Miku then handed the pouch filled with fifty gold pieces. The shop clerk, named Meiko, bowed again as we both left the shop. We loaded the flowers first and afterwards I helped Miku in. I was about to enter the coach when I saw Rin looking at me. I stood frozen on my spot for a minute. I wanted to get out of here and away from her but somehow my body refused to. It was good thing though that Miku decided to come out, because if she hadn't, I didn't know how long we were going to play the <em>staring<em> game.

"Oh Rin! It has been such a long time. Tell me did you find a job?" Rin managed to nod but she still continued to look at me. Miku seemed to notice that and decided to push me inside the coach. I refused at first since I didn't want Rin getting anywhere close to Miku, but the look on Miku's face suggested that I followed what she ordered. I decided to sit near the door and eavesdrop instead since I had nothing better to do. Why is it that when my life finally goes smoothly, she appears. I made it clear to her that she had to stay away from us but she always manages to find a way to see us.

"How is it here in town? Did you meet any nice people?" Miku asked. Miku was always worried when Rin was alone. She was the type that always sees to it that Rin didn't get into any trouble which made it more difficult for me to keep her away from Rin.

"Yes I have Mistress Miku; I work here in this flower shop along with my new friends. Meiko and Kaito have been very kind to me, even to the extent that they decided to make me live in their house."

"I see, and you enjoy their company then?" Miku asked again. I peeped through the window and saw Rin nod. Their conversation might end a little while so I decided to have it end quickly. We were in a hurry and wasting time on idle chatter would delay certain arrangements prepared. I then looked out of the door and was about to call Miku when I saw a boy with snowy-white hair approaching us.

"There you are Rin! I've been looking for you for hours. The flowers are in bloom and I want you to see it." The boy happily announced.

"And who is this handsome man Rin? Don't tell me he's a paramour of yours." Miku giggled making both the boy and Rin blush. I looked at the boy from top to bottom. He pretty much looked like the boys in the village and I was expecting Rin would find someone better. I shook my head trying to erase such thoughts.

As if I'd care of whom Rin's paramour was.

"A pleasure to meet you then, my name is Miku and you are?" Miku asked. The boy then shook hands with Miku. "My name is Piko."

"So Piko, I expect you to be a good towards Rin then when I'm not around."

"Mistress Miku!" Rin turned red again. Piko smiled and nodded happily. "Sure, I'll do my best."

"Not you too!" Rin frowned. Somehow I felt irritated and looked out the window. I called Miku's attention and told her we had to leave. I didn't want to waste another moment being here.

"We have to go Rin. We'll see each other soon I guess, till then make sure you take care of her Piko." Miku waved and she entered the coach. I didn't want to wait for Miku to look out and wave good-bye so I hurriedly asked to coach to return to the manor.

* * *

><p>"Don't you think they look good together?" Miku asked me when got down the coach. I could only shrug since I really didn't care if they suited each other or not. We had other matters to attend to so I had no time for such useless matters about who suited who.<p>

"I can tell Rin will be very happy there in town especially since she has someone like Piko."

"And who is this Piko?" I turned to the voice and found Rei leaning by the entrance. Lately, ever since Rin left, Rei seemed to always be in a foul mood. He'd rarely eat and was always out. I never really knew where he went but he'd always come back here with a few geese or so. He might be venting out his anger by hunting every now and then.

"Hmm…I don't know much about him. Rin only introduced him to us a while back while we were buying flowers for the ball." Miku said. Rei then turned to me for answer but I could only give him what Miku knew because technically I didn't care who this guy was.

"So Rin managed to find a job in town then?" Rei asked me and I nodded. He smiled a bit, probably happy about seeing Rin all the time. Really, of all people to be fond of Rin it had to be my brother.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I shushed Piko for the third time.

I didn't want him to talk about Miku and Len right now. I didn't know what to do when I met him face to face. I made to myself clear that after the confession I had to forget him. It was difficult at first but somehow I manage to overcome it little by little. I was expecting it to go smoothly but his appearance here made me break that resolve.

I laughed to myself. He always broke my resolves.

* * *

><p>"Fine I'll stop Rin." Piko finally said. I nodded in reply and decided to change the topic. Knowing Piko, he would never stop even if he said he would.<p>

"Are they truly beautiful? The flowers blooming."

"Yes they were Rin! If we hurry we might make it in time." Piko took me by the hand as we ran towards the meadow not too far from the town. It was nice to have Piko around I guess. Even if Piko didn't notice it, his childish demeanour always made me laugh.

I considered myself lucky to be friends with him.

* * *

><p>"Meiko! Kaito!" Piko called out as we ran towards them. A picnic was prepared beneath a huge tree which overlooked the entire meadow. Night was quickly approaching making the meadow full of moonflowers and morning glories look breath-taking and beautiful. My stomach growled when I saw the feast since all that running drained all my energy.<p>

"Here have a sandwich." Kaito handed me an egg sandwich which I ate hungrily. Meiko was about to drink the ale but Kaito grabbed it quickly.

"Are you mad! Drink this some other time." Meiko smacked Kaito on the head and grabbed the whole jug of ale.

"Don't worry I won't get drunk if that's what your worried about. Rin will take over in case I do." She finished the jug in two gulps and leaned by the tree lazily. Soon afterwards she was finally asleep. Kaito sighed as he covered her with a blanket and got up.

"Why don't you guys head on over. We'll catch up later when Meiko's finally awake and sober." Piko nodded and gestured me towards the path that led to the meadow's centre.

* * *

><p>"You better be careful Rin, the way down is full of loose earth." Piko warned but I didn't care. I used to roll down the meadow back in Valice and it didn't hurt at all. The grass always supported you so getting hurt was never a problem.<p>

"Watch out!" Piko shouted and grabbed me by the arm. It was a bad option though since my weight overpowered his and soon we both tumbled down the hill. I laughed heartily as we tumbled down until both of us landed on the soft grass.

"That was fun!" I grinned. I opened my eyes to look up at the sky as I always did but what I saw wasn't the sky but Piko looking down at me with a surprised expression. Silence soon engulfed us. I wonder why I'm feeling very nervous right now. We should be enjoying this time right?

"Oi~ what are you two love-birds doing there?" Kaito shouted. Piko quickly got off me and stood up. His stare lingered for a minute until Kaito and Meiko finally got to the meadow.

"Really Piko? That was very bold of you." Meiko laughed. Piko turned red and tried to explain what happened. I was speechless this time since I really did know what passed between us. That long silence we experienced disturbed me a bit. Just what were those feelings?

"Look the flowers!" We all turned to where Kaito pointed and saw the petals being blown by the wind. The night combined with the white and blue petals made the scenery so beautiful and romantic…

Truly for me, this was the best night I've ever experienced since I got here.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"Damn it!" I cursed. My hand pricked on the white roses Miku handed to me. The wound wasn't that big but the droplets of blood stained the white roses.

"Oh Len! Your finger we have to do something about it." Miku panicked and soon called for a maid to find the house physician. I sighed to myself. She didn't need to call the physician and create a hassle; it was only a cut and only needed a slight bandage.

* * *

><p><em>-Flashback-<em>

_**-Eight years ago-**_

"_Ouch!" I jerked my hand and saw blood dripping from my index finger. It was raining and Rei's pet dog ran under the bush. Rei asked me to fetch it since mom and dad weren't around and Rei loved it very much. Mom and dad rarely went to see us since work was always in the way so I always stood as the breadwinner of the family when they weren't here. I had to be strong for Rei, because if I weren't, we'd be like children crying over nothing._

"_Are you alright Len?" I looked away from my wound and saw Rin drenched in the rain. I quickly hid my wound behind my back so Rin wouldn't worry but her eyes were fast and she saw it immediately._

"_Len your hurt, we have to take it back or else it'll get infected." Rin tried to grab my arm but I pulled back, I wasn't going back in without Rei's dog. After all, I promised Rei I'd come back with it. I wasn't letting one small scratch break my promise._

"_Well if your so stubborn-," Rin pulled out my hand from behind my back. She then brought out her hanky and ripped off a small portion of it. I reluctantly opened my hand to show the wound to Rin. She wiped the blood off first and gave it a kiss before tying the hanky around my wound. The pain receded soon after until it was just a numbing sensation._

"_There all better!" Rin grinned. I was lucky to have Rin here, had it been another maid then maybe I would never have found Rei's dog._

"_Rei's dog is inside the bush, I was wondering if you could help me Rin." I asked. Rin giggled and looked under the bush. The dog turned to Rin and quickly ran out to her._

"_How'd you-," I asked dumbfounded. The dog refused to approach me but it when Rin looked it just suddenly jumped out to her._

"_The dog's mom was my pet dog so I raised it until your dad gave it you as a present." The dog licked Rin on the cheek. _

_Really…It good to have someone like you Rin._

_-End-_

* * *

><p>"Hmph" I huffed.<p>

Funny how I remembered past memories

* * *

><p>There I'm finally done with Chapter 5! I was not expecting to get 85 reviews so thank very much for all your support.<p>

If you're wondering about why Rei didn't know who Rin was and yet Rin knew who he was…well Rei and Rin never really met personally. Rin didn't really live with Len's family. She was placed in an orphanage and had Len's dad as her benefactor. Only Len went to visit her since Rei was still young to leave the manor. When Rei was finally allowed to leave that was when Rin moved in to work for Miku so that explains why they never met. Len never mentioned her to Rei since Len had a sort of rivalry with Rei. Rei got their parent's attention and Len thought Rin, being his only close friend, might be easily stolen by Rei. So Len kept Rin's existence a complete secret to Rei until Rei met Rin personally as Miku's maid. It was a while later that Rei knew Rin and Len had been childhood friends.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	6. Holding On

Chapter six is now out!

I was inspired more than ever when i heard Rin's song "Secret Crush" and the Kagamine's duo "Hello Again"

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><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID or the songs Rin sang here! They all belong to their respected owners.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Six:<br>**

Holding On

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

"Do you have a partner for the ball Rei?" Miku asked me one day. Miku's pre-engagement ball was nearing and sadly I had no partner as of late. Sure many girls invited to the ball asked me but there was no one that I wanted to accept. I wanted to invite Rin but she didn't have an invitation so she couldn't come. That is unless…

"I actually have one but she lost her invitation."

"Well that's not such a problem Rei, here take this one." Miku handed me a white envelope and I smiled. "Thanks a lot Miku." I replied, getting up. I quickly grabbed my coat, got out the manor and entered the coach.

"To the town please." I ordered and the coach driver pulled the bridle and we were off.

Now the matter of importance is that if Rin would agree to come…

* * *

><p>"Excuse me but does Rin work in this shop?" I asked the store clerk named Meiko. She looked at me warily but I assured her that I was an old friend of Rin and meant no harm.<p>

"Yes she does work here, wait for a while I call for her." Meiko ordered the tall blue-haired man to keep an eye on me while she went out. Seriously, Nii-sama was well known here and yet I am his younger brother and no one even recognizes me.

"So an old acquaintance of Rin eh~" The man asked and I nodded.

"Well now how well do you know Rin then chap?" He added curiously.

"She worked as a maid of my brother's fiancée once. I'm more of a close friend you see." I replied casually. Really how long do they plan to keep me cooped up here? The man looked at me intently but his death stares didn't seem to scare me at all.

"I assure your sir I mean no harm to her."

"Right, I hear that all the time." The man replied sarcastically. I was about to start a very tiring argument with him if Rin hadn't appeared right on time.

"Rei! What are you doing here?" I was about to walk up to her when I saw a boy with snowy-white hair behind her. He gave me a somewhat look of worry and whispered something to Rin.

"Don't worry Piko he means no harm and stop scaring Rei already Kaito!" The man behind me sighed and nodded but I didn't care about him. I was actually looking more at the boy behind Rin. So this was the renowned Piko that Miku mentioned. He didn't look much and how is he even 'perfect' for Rin when he looks to frail and weak to even protect her?

Rin deserved someone better than him.

"Can we have this somewhere else private Rin?" I asked while I eyed the boy. Rin then excused herself and made a promise to be back before nightfall. The boy continued to glare at me but none of those threats bothered me. I gestured Rin out the door and quickly closed it shut.

* * *

><p>"So Rei…what makes this conversation important that we had to leave the shop?" Rin asked curiously. I took out the white envelope and gave it to her. She opened it and read the contents. At first she seemed to take it in real slowly but when she reached the end she crumpled the paper and tossed it back to me.<p>

"What was that for Rei! I thought we were friends and yet you hand me _that_."

"Allow me to explain Rin." I begged. Rin looked hurt again and this time it was my fault. Damn it! Could I never make her happy?

"That paper already says it all Rei! Tell me who had you send it, Miku? Len?"

"It was my idea Rin, I didn't have a partner for the ball so decided to ask you instead." I was practically pleading now. I could see she was fuming. It was either she said yes or I'd leave the place without a partner for the ball and a cheeky grin from that 'Piko' kid.

"There are lots of beautiful girls invited to the ball; at least one of them was enough to catch your attention. Besides, what can a maid like me do to gain your attention!"

"Everything!" I shouted back. She clammed up instantly and stared at me for a long time. I was blushing deep red and I can tell by the way she's looking at me that she can clearly see it.

"Please Rin…" I begged and she sighed, probably trying to consider her options. She turned back to me and to my complete surprise she nodded.

"Fine just this once Rei." I hugged her tightly and spun her in circles. She tried to pry herself free but I wouldn't let go. I was so happy that I wanted to kiss her on the spot.

"Rei! You're smothering me…" Rin pushed herself free and gasped for air. She immediately tried to whack me on the head but I quickly dodged it and caught her in the arm. Her face was so close to mine and yet I could never kiss her. I didn't want to lose this friendship. She's been through a lot that I didn't want to add this anymore than what she already has.

No matter what happens, I will hold on to our promise.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

Rei gave Piko a long glare before he turned to me and waved goodbye. Men…When you say yes to them, they always tend to do strange actions. Piko slammed the door and turned to me with a pouting face. He always acted like a child whenever he was with me which was a bit annoying. Can't for once he act like a grown up and talk to me properly.

"Neh~ Rin who was that guy?" Meiko and Kaito were asleep and so Piko and I had the whole shop to ourselves. I then took my seat on a brown stool and turned to him.

"An old friend of mine Piko, his name is Rei."

"Rei as in Rei Kagamine? The youngest son of Valice's duke." I nodded trying to hide my pained expression from him. That name…How long has it been since I last heard it.

"Then that makes him Len Kagamine's brother and Mistress Miku's future brother-in-la-," I cut him short and shook my head. Of all things for him to talk about it had to be this one. Piko took my 'no' seriously and nodded in agreement to never talk about it.

"Well then with that settled why don't we go back to bed?" I replied changing the topic. Piko frowned and got up. He opened the door and eyed me for a while.

"Well enjoy the ball then Rin…" He didn't wait for a reply and closed the door.

Really Rin what have you gotten yourself into?

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

Rei came home unexpectedly late.

Truth be told I wasn't worried about his nightly strolls but coming home with a grin on his face in the dead of night…something's off.

"Hey Rei where were you?" I asked as he handed his coat to one of the maids. Rei just flashed me a smile making me slightly irritated. Of all brothers why couldn't I have a serious one?

"Hello brother…"

"And what brings you home in the middle of the night with a smile on your face Rei? Something good must've happened then."

"Yes indeed Nii-sama, if you'll excuse me please." He talked no more and strode up the stairs. Miku appeared afterwards and sat next to me.

"Imagine Len, a few weeks from now our pre-engagement ball will be held…Will I look beautiful if you saw me?"

"Silly, of course you would, if I were the Prince then that would make you my Cinderella." Miku giggled at my comment making me smile.

"Will you look at no one else but me then Len? Like a spell Cinderella unknowingly casted on the Prince?" Miku asked and I nodded. She was the only one I positively would look on and no one else.

I wonder why Miku asked such a question.

* * *

><p>It was already six in the evening by the time we were through.<p>

Miku decided to have a small celebration on its success and decided to have a feast. While the rest were busy preparing, Miku asked me to buy some wine from town. I refused at first since not all of us in the manor drink but Miku persisted of it and sent me out to buy. She could've sent someone else…Why did it have to be me?

"That'll be one hundred gold pieces." I handed the clerk the pouch of money before leaving the building. Rain began to fall from the sky forcing me to make a run for it towards the coach. I soon passed by an empty park and saw a familiar figure sitting on a marble bench. I stepped back a bit and walked the other way instead but her soft voice made me stop and listen.

"_As I try to hate you, my love towards you is overwhelming…So, I wish I could forget all the feelings I have for you. Let me get soaked with sweet time just for now, I know what is true."_ She sang before she broke into soft sobs. I could only stare at her from the distance, wasn't I suppose to hate her? And yet here I am listening to her sing her heart out.

"_Please at the very least let me hear you call my name, Even if one day these feelings go away…I want you in my heart to stay as you were at that time forever, Please keep smiling… More than you are now. As long as you're smiling under the unknown starry sky I'm satisfied, the words I couldn't tell you are scrabbling in my mind even now… So I'll tell it without sounds." _She was hesitant in the last part as if she knew I was watching her. She then turned to my direction behind the gates. The rain was strong making it impossible to see clearly so when she suddenly turned to my direction, it made me flinch. I knew it was her from her voice and the white ribbon Rei had given her, but in her point of view I would've looked just like any other ordinary passer-by. We stared at each other for a long time until Rin gave off a faint smile and said the last line of the song.

"_I loved you so much…" _When did she say these lines again? Now I remembered –When I sent her out the manor. I got over it afterwards though but after she said it to me again here, it made me feel wrong inside. Why is she making me feel so troubled lately? Even after what happened to Miku I still felt like I had to forgive her?

Why is she making me doubt my actions even more?

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

Even if it the rain was strong I still knew it was him. No matter how far apart we are I could still tell if it was him watching me or not.

He just stood there looking at me with those eyes I could no longer read. Even after I said that last line to him he still looked at me like that. I wonder why I keep on hoping. As if a small voice in my mind is telling me that there's still a chance.

"Len!" I shouted back. He seemed surprised I called him but he didn't leave his spot. Besides, I couldn't reach him. The locked gates of the park made sure of it. We were silent again; there were no more words to exchange after all. The memories we had of each other no longer lingered; only the feeling of bitter pain was left.

"Len!" I called out again this time my voice sounding desperate. For once couldn't he just reply? Please if miracles really existed at least make him answer back. I stared at him and still he didn't move. His gaze was fixed on me.

"What do you want!" He replied as if irritated but I could sense his voice quivering. I rubbed the tears from my eyes and forced a smile at him. "I was just wondering how you were."

"Very much fine after you left." He shouted but he didn't seem to mind as I approached him. Only the gate was the wall between us so maybe he didn't mind my presence close to his.

"Really?" I asked back. For a bit he looked away as if he was guilty of something…as if he was regretting something. I would if I could, reach out to him but he'd just brush me aside. He hated me after all.

"Yes really, and if you don't mind I have to get going now." He was about to walk off but I reached my hand out and grabbed him by the sleeve. Not yet…don't go just yet. Tears were escaping my eyes again and it was futile to hide them. He saw them completely well; I fumbled for the words to say. It took a while but he didn't seem to notice the time it took, that to me was alright.

"Good luck Len, as always I wish the best of happiness." I murmured while I gripped his sleeve tightly as if it were my life. I would have to let go sooner or later. I wasn't the only wanting him here by my side even if for just a moment. My hand loosened and no sooner had I done it, he ran off. As his figure vanished from my sight, I then fell to the ground and cried as if there was no tomorrow.

When the time comes Len…Please hold on as well and don't let go.

* * *

><p>Sorry if I hadn't updated for a long time… School just started and we had home works to do! I did my best to write it quickly but the assignments got in the way. But finally I am done! Thank you so much for being patient with me and I hope you R&amp;R.<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	7. Forgiveness and Acceptance

Chapter Seven is here and thank you so much for waiting :)

* * *

><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their repsected owners!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Seven:<strong>**  
><strong>

Forgiveness and Acceptance

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

I never knew that choosing a dress was this hard.

"What about this design sir?" The seamstress asked as she handed me a piece of paper. The dress would've been right but the hat would not suit Rin. I handed it back and started flipping a book, looking for a suitable dress for her. It had to be something both angelic and beautiful.

"Looking for something to wear to the ball Rei?" I turned to the voice and found Nii-sama with Miku. It seems they too were looking for a dress for the ball tomorrow night. Miku turned to the book I was holding and frowned.

"Neh~ Rei isn't that women's clothing?" I turned red and stood up.

"I-I know that! My partner had no dress to suit her so I decided to buy her one."

"Who's your partner anyway Rei?" Brother asked curiously. I froze and turned to him. Should I tell him it was Rin? But if I did then brother would never allow it, what's worse is that he might yell at Rin. I doubt it that Rin could handle another scolding from brother. I had to keep it a secret.

"She's an old friend of mine and I happened to meet her here in town by coincidence. I had no partner for the ball so I asked her out."

"She must be very special to you Rei?" Miku giggled making me blush. Of course she was very special to me.

* * *

><p>"What about this one Rei? She might look cute in these." Miku asked as she twirled a pink dress and faced me. Seriously, it'd suit Miku but not Rin. I shook my head and again turned to the book.<p>

"What's she like anyway Rei? You know; size, built, hair colour. Those types so that Miku wouldn't always base what the girl looks like from her." Len asked and grinned when he saw Miku's pouting expression.

"Well she's as tall as you Nii-sama, her built is light and she has blonde hair." I answered. Brother quickly looked at me doubtfully. Could he have caught on to me?

"Then I know just the thing that'd suit her Rei." Miku cut off and quickly ran to one section of the building and pulled out a white dress with angel wings attached at the back. I stared at it for a long time when Miku handed it to me. Would this even suit Rin? I turned to brother who nodded in reply.

"I'm sure it'd suit her Rei. She's your angel after all." Brother answered as if he knew who the dress was for. If he did, I'd never deny it anyways.

"She used to be your angel Nii-sama, what happened?" I murmured softly as I handed it to the seamstress. Rin talked of nothing to me but your well-being it almost made me jealous. She always looked at no one but you. It was unfair that she thought me as nothing but your shadow.

"Rei?" Miku waved her hand in front of my face trying to gain my attention.

"Sorry I was thinking of something. If you'll excuse me I have to go." I replied as soon as I got the dress. Someday…For sure, she'll see me instead of you Nii-sama.

I'm no longer your shadow anymore.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

Rei…

"He was sure in a hurry Len. I wonder why?" Miku wondered as we watched Rei board his coach. He was careful to place the box first and then went in.

"Maybe he wanted to give the present to his friend quickly." Miku added by the time the coach was off. Give it to her quickly huh? Rei was never the guy to rush and yet… this girl; was she worth it?

"Miku have you chosen something for the ball already?" I asked and Miku nodded. I then gave the box to the coach man and helped Miku into the coach. Maybe the only way to find out who this girl is was to follow Rei. The moment he said she had blonde hair, how come I quickly thought of Rin? There are a lot of blonde-haired ladies here but she was the first to come to my mind. She and Rei had been very close lately it was starting to bother me. At first I was against it but as the days wore on I gave up; when Rei wants to do something he'd do no matter what. It was his stubbornness to understand situations that always got him into trouble.

"Len are you not coming in?" Miku asked but I shook my head in reply.

"I have to go somewhere Miku, go on ahead and I'll follow shortly when I'm done." Miku frowned at my reply and nodded.

"Be sure to come home early this time Len." Was all she said and closed the door. I then got on a different coach and waved goodbye to Miku.

"To the Flower Shoppe please." I said and the coach sped off.

Could this girl really be Rin?

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I gave a slight bow as he entered the shop.

"Welcome sir." I forced a smile. After what happened two nights ago, I swore I'd give up hoping he'd walk into this store again and yet…there he was.

"Thank you Rin." Len bowed back and scanned the room. I was the only one tending the shop today since Meiko and Kaito were out in the market to buy food. As for Piko, he was taking a nap in the house since he was done with his shift. So that made Len and me the only one in the shop.

"Looking for something to buy for Lady Miku?" I asked. Len was silent for moment as if deep in thought before he replied to me.

"I came here for a different reason Rin… I was wondering if you've seen Rei anywhere."

"As of today I actually haven't seen him yet. Why are you asking anyway Len?" I questioned but Len refused to answer. I wonder why he was looking for Rei and how did he know that Rei visited here often?

"Wait, you said you haven't seen him yet, does that mean you were expecting him then?"

"Yes of course I am, he ordered a bunch of Ipomoea and he said he'd claim it today." I replied and strangely Len sighed in relief. He's acting strange lately and it's making me worry. Sadly, I'm no longer in any position to wonder or ask if he was alright or not anymore…that sole role now belonged to Lady Miku.

"Thank you very much Rin. Sorry to have taken your time." Len bowed. He seemed different lately, as if I could finally see those guarded eyes again. He no longer looked at me coldly nor yelled at me. I wonder why? Could it be what I said to him before!

"Rin are you alright your face is red?" Len asked as he placed his cool hand on my forehead.

* * *

><p><em>-Flashback-<em>

"_Don't overwork yourself next time Rin." Len scolded as he placed a wet towel on my head. Even Mistress Miku was worried when I collapsed while helping her in her gown. I wanted to be of help but in doing so I overexerted myself and got sick._

"_I'm sorry to make you all worry." _

"_Seriously Rin…Whatever am I going to do with you?" Len sighed as he got up and took the candle from the bedside table._

"_Len?" I called out making him turn around._

"_Yes Rin?"_

"_Thanks a lot for today." I smiled weakly. He smiled back and ruffled my hair. "If it's you Rin of course I'd do it." He was about to take his leave when I grabbed him by the sleeve._

"_Yes Rin?" Len asked again. I turned redder and redder as I tried to convey what I had to say. _

"_C-can you wait for me to s-sleep Len… Like before?" I managed to say. Len laughed and nodded. "Fine Rin if it'll make you feel better." He then turned the couch by the fireplace to my direction and sat down. I felt assured and drifted to sleep. When morning came I saw Len asleep on the couch and my fever gone. It was thanks to him I got better…_

_-End-_

* * *

><p>Like before huh?<p>

"Thanks for worrying Len but I'm fine." I smiled. Len smiled back taking me by surprise. Did he really change this time?

"Len… Is that really you?" I asked Len.

"Of course it's me Rin? Are you sure you're alright?" Len asked worriedly. Is my mind playing tricks on me?

"Of course I am…I'm just surprised you've finally started talking to me again." I replied. Len noticed it too and suddenly turned serious again but he was still there…The Len I knew.

"A-about that Rin… I'm sorry for everything. It was just that Miku was hurt badly I thought I'd lose her. She means a lot to me… even my life and I kind of lost composure but she's alive and that's what matters. As time dragged on though…I realized that what I did to you was wrong. I know you didn't mean any harm to Miku and she told me that. I guess I didn't give you any benefit of the doubt…" Len trailed off.

"I know that asking for forgiveness from you is hard but I want you to know that I'm still your friend no matter what happens. I really am sorry Rin…Truly I am."

"I believe you Len…But please forgive me if ever you offer me back to the manor and I refuse it." I replied and gave a bow as well.

"Why?" Len asked curiously.

"I plan to start anew here Len…Staying there only brings back bitter memories for me. Remember Len, we are no longer friends. As I said before, the moment you sent me out was the day we broke off our friendship. I am neither cruel nor unforgiving but it is for the best we start from the beginning. For now we are nothing more but acquaintances." I replied trying to sound strong. I knew Len meant well for us both, but starting from the beginning will help us ease ourselves and the people around us. I was glad at least that Len was back to normal. The real Len was here and I have been forgiven.

"Very well Rin…at the very least don't hesitate to call when you need help." Len replied as he took his leave from the store.

Now I have no more doubts.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

Rin told me of what happened and somehow I was both glad and upset.

I was glad because brother had finally forgiven her and that she could attend the ball without worries but what made me upset was that now it meant that I was pushed back into the shadows again. She finally had nii-sama back to help her…so where did that put me in.

"Rei?" Rin looked at me worriedly. I tried to force a smile but I couldn't help it. It was just too painful.

"Rin…You love brother very much do you? Even if he is taken you still love him." I asked making her turn red.

"So where does that put me Rin? I know I can never be like nii-sama but please don't turn me into his shadow…" I murmured as I looked at her. She turned away from me and frowned.

"Rei, you were never Len's shadow to me; remember that."

"Then tell me Rin, what am I to you if I am not my brother's shadow?" I asked. Rin turned to me with a smile on her face and ruffled my hair.

"Let's say you were my guardian angel Rei; the one who helped me up when I fell, the one who made me smile when I cried. You were there to tell me never to give up." Rin pointed out.

"But those are what nii-sama does…" I trailed off. I didn't want to sound upset but it was the truth. Those were what brother was to her.

"Then tell me Rei what _do_ you want to be to me anyway?" Rin finally asked. I turned red as she asked me that. What do I even tell her?

"Well Rin…I want to be someone special to you. Someone not even brother can be compared to Rin. I guess that's what I want to be for you."

"W-well Rei consider that done then…Hehehe." Rin laughed nervously. I then hugged her tightly and nodded.

"Thanks Rin…That just made my day." I replied. Rin hugged me back and nodded as well.

"You're welcome Rei."

* * *

><p>"Here Rin for you…I knew you had nothing to wear for the ball so I bought you one." I said as I handed her the box. Rin's eyes grew wide at its size and turned to me with a grin on her face.<p>

"I-I don't know what to say Rei…thanks I guess."

"Make sure you wear it alright." I replied while getting on the coach. I'm glad she liked it.

"Of course I would Rei; you gave it to me after all." She laughed. I then looked out and waved her good-bye as the coach sped off.

* * *

><p>Well here we go chapter seven! I'll do my best to update fast to just stay tuned<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	8. Forgotten

Chapter 8 guys! Sorry for the short update even when it took such a long time...

* * *

><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their repsected owners!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Eight:<strong>

Forgotten

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

Meiko tied the ribbon to the side of my hair and started adding feathers to it.

I remained motionless, afraid that any slight movement would ruin this night. When Meiko finally finished my hair by adding the pins, she then helped me up and faced me to the mirror.

"Meiko…I-," I fumbled to say as I stared at the reflection that stared back at me. She giggled at my expression and slung her arms around me.

"Of course you look beautiful! Who ever said that you weren't?" Meiko replied while she laughed. I smiled at her and bowed.

"Thanks a lot Meiko."

"The pleasure is mine Rin, anytime you want my help don't hesitate to call." She winked as we left the room. Finally, the ball is tonight and I plan to enjoy it greatly. There will no longer be hindrances to stop me from enjoying the night. I breathed deeply, trying to calm the energy that wanted to escape as I opened the door that led to the shop.

* * *

><p>"Well now! Isn't she a beauty?" Kaito breathed as I entered the shop. Rei and Piko quickly turned to my direction and then glared at each other for a long time before looking away with irritation.<p>

"I designed her so she deserves to look beautiful." Meiko boasted as she admired her design on me. I bowed in front of all of them as how Miku once taught me. Rei got up and approached me with a smirk on his face. He bowed as well and extended his hand.

"May I have the honour of taking the hand of the lovely maiden standing in front of me?" Rei asked coolly making me blush again.

"Yes you may." I replied and took hold of his hand. Meiko and Kaito applauded as Rei led me to the store's centre and danced with me to the sound of the night's music. My heart was racing fast as we danced around the store. Neither Len nor Miku taught me yet how to dance so I was afraid to make any mistakes but with Rei supporting me as we danced I felt as if I knew the steps very well.

"Ahem! If you don't hurry you might be late for the ball." Piko replied breaking us both from our trance. Rei glared at Piko for a long time and then nodded.

"He's right Rin, but don't worry we'll continue this at the dance hall when we arrive." Rei smiled and helped out of the store and into the carriage.

* * *

><p>"Here Rin, the party is after all a masquerade ball so you'll have to wear a mask." Rei said as I put on the white mask he just gave me. He too, took out his black one and put it on. A mask to conceal who you meet hmm…it made me safe as I put it on.<p>

"Rin…" Rei whispered and I turned to him. There was something wrong with him tonight, he was always upbeat and ready for anything but lately he looks almost sombre and easily preoccupied.

"Yes Rei?"

"I'm a cruel person don't you think so?" Rei suddenly asked taking me by surprise.

"What makes you say that Rei? As far as I'm concerned, I've never seen you do anything bad." I replied getting worried. Rei looked out the window with a wistful look on his face.

"Does it hurt Rin? That feeling when you see the person you like with someone else." He added which made me a bit upset. Here we were about to enjoy a very beautiful night and then he just makes it worse. Why is he acting like this?

"I admit Rei it hurts but if you want that person to happy then wouldn't you gladly be at pain for their happiness. Why are we even talking about this?"

"Like I told you Rin, I'm just too cruel…" He whispered making me even more irritated.

"Rei what has gotten into you?" I shouted back. He remained silent for a long time before turning to me with a pained expression.

"It's just too painful Rin…I can't bear it. I'm not as strong as you think I am. When I see you smile in front of him it makes me upset. All I do is make you sad and angry, it makes me feel so useless. Even if it's for your happiness…I just can't give you to him." He nearly cried out. It was the first time I saw him in so much pain and remorse.

"Rei…" I called out worriedly. He hugged me tightly but I didn't pull away, instead, I hugged him back. I didn't want to see him like this again…it was too painful to watch.

"Please Rin…don't let go. Don't lock me up in the darkness again." He whispered. I embraced him tightly and nodded trying my best to act strong for him.

"I won't let go Rei…I promise you I won't let go. So please…" I begged burying my face on his shoulders. We stayed like this until Rei loosened his hold and looked at me with those faded gold eyes.

"Thank you Rin…" He whispered weakly.

For your sake Rei…I will be the light to guide your way.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~MIKU~<strong>_

His anxiousness was making me nervous.

Len was always glancing towards the entrance every time someone was entering. It made me both curious and worried. Curious because I didn't know who he was expecting; worried because I was afraid to find out who it was. He said he'd look at no one but me tonight, but lately his mind is elsewhere instead.

"Len who are you waiting for?" I asked unable to contain the curiosity suffocating me. Len didn't seem to hear me which made me slightly irritated.

"Len!"

"Y-yes Miku what is it?"

"Seriously Len, who is this person you're waiting for?" Len kept silent as he stared at me with those deep sapphire eyes of his.

"It's Rei…He's late so I'm just worried." He replied. Lies…it was just too obvious. It wasn't Rei he was waiting for but someone else. I didn't pry any further after I heard what he had said. I was too afraid to know the truth…especially if it was Len who said it. I just nodded in reply and watched as Len turned towards the entrance again.

* * *

><p>It was already midnight.<p>

"Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for coming to our pre-engagement ball; it is an honour to have you all here tonight." Len said as he raised his glass in cheers. Everyone raised their glasses as well.

"Don't they make a beautiful pair?" A lady commented while she took a sip from her glass.

"Imagine; Valice's future duke and Claridan's future Duchess, two powerful bloodlines. Surely our country will profit from this greatly." A man added making me smile. True my marriage to Len would mean stronger ties with both countries but that wasn't the purpose I married him. I wasn't some evil woman who'd want nothing but to profit from my husband. I love Len with all my heart and I'm not willing to have it destroyed so easily.

The music started playing and soon everyone made their way to the dance hall. I put on my blue mask and held on to Len's arm as we descended the long stairway. It was like a fairy-tale come true, me and Len dancing together in a masquerade ball. Even if his gold mask hid his face, I could tell that the way he looked at me was full of loving and happiness.

"It's an honour to dance with someone as beautiful as you Miku." Len smiled as he spun me around. I giggled at the comment and approached him when the band shifted to the next tune.

"Well it's an honour as well to dance with a dashing man like you."

"Really now?" He asked raising a brow.

"Of course." I replied. We continued this long dance as if the world consisted of no one but the both of us. The music paired with the atmosphere made me all giddy inside. When partners were about to be switched, I was almost reluctant to let go but the way he looked at me made me assured that he'd come back.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I never knew that dancing would be this difficult.

"One, Two, three… One, two, three." Rei repeated as he spun me around the second time. True it was easy when we did it back at the shop but that was when it was just the two of us.

"Oh! Sorry Rei." I said when I stepped on his foot. It was a good thing Rei was patient, because if he wasn't then he'd be yelling at me by now.

"It's okay Rin, just take a deep breath and follow my lead." He added while giving me a faint smile. At least he was finally lightening up and not sulking about. After the incident in the carriage, I thought that he'd remain like that for a long time. I guess making that promise to him finally calmed him down.

But the hard part is whether or not I could keep it for a long time.

* * *

><p>"Ouch!" I snapped back to reality when I noticed the song change and Rei was no longer the one I was dancing with. The man was clothed in yellow unlike Rei's black one. He wore a gold mask while his hair was tied to a short ponytail. His face showed that he was slightly in pain. I then looked down and noticed that I had stepped on his foot.<p>

"I'm terribly sorry!" I apologized. The man put off a slight grin and composed himself.

"You still never change…Rin." My eyes grew wide when he called my name. This man…could it be?

"Len?" I asked and sure enough the man removed his mask and there standing before me was none other than Len. I tried to step back and look for Rei when suddenly Len gripped me by the arm and pulled me back.

"It'd be a shame to leave so early Rin, at least do me the honour of dancing with you tonight." Len smiled as he pulled me to him. My heart was beating fast as he moved closer to me while we danced the waltz. I just hoped he didn't see me blush every time he spun me around the dance floor. Where on earth could Rei be? I quickly scanned the crowd, hoping to find his figure amongst the dancers that passed by.

"You'll trip if you look elsewhere Rin." Len said when he noticed me looking behind my back.

"It's Rei…I can't find him. One minute he's dancing with me then the next thing I knew, he's now replaced by you." I replied when I turned to him. Len frowned for a bit taking me by surprise. When did I last see him do this? It almost felt like years since I last saw this side of his…

The side he only showed to me and no one else.

But knowing the situation now…I suppose Miku had already seen this side of him. I guess I really have nothing I can call my own now can I?

"Rin!" I turned around and found Rei running towards us. My heart heaved a sigh of relief as I let go of Len and ran towards him.

"Wait!" Len shouted grabbing me by the arm. I turned to him and saw his eyes full of sadness… that pain I couldn't seem to understand. A few people turned to us and for that instant, Len looked away and let me go.

"Go." Was all he said as he walked away from me.

* * *

><p>Summer's finally here! Sorry for updating late I'll try my best to update as fast as I can so just stay tuned. P.S: Please comment if I need to polish anything in my work since I feel as if I'm not writing it as well as I used to. Tnx.<p>

And another thing...The comment made by **A. **Well the title I used was purely by coincidence. I actually didn't know that the title I had made was the same title as the author of that story. Just posting this to clear up that comment. :)

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	9. A Broken Promise

Chapter 9 is finally here :)

* * *

><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their repsected owners!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Nine:<br>**

A Broken Promise

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"Rin, what did brother want from you anyways?" Rei asked me while we took a break from all the dancing.

"Nothing Rei…He didn't even know that he was dancing with me had it not been for my usual manner that revealed me."

"Are you sure Rin?"

"Why does it concern you Rei?" I asked him curiously. Rei turned pensive for a moment before shaking his head as if erasing some thoughts.

"Never mind…Let's just enjoy this evening then, shall we?" He smiled while getting up and offering me his hand. I took it reluctantly, wondering why he quickly avoided the conversation.

Knowing Rei, he'd refuse to leave his questions unanswered.

* * *

><p>"Rei…Is something bothering you lately?" I asked while we danced. Rei wasn't talking and almost as if deep in thought. Did I anger him again?<p>

"Rei…Are you mad?" I added taking him by surprise.

"Whatever do you mean Rin? I'm not mad…just worried that's all."

"Well then, what's making you worry?" I asked. I was glad at that he wasn't mad but it made me uneasy that he was worried about something.

"Sorry for making you worry all the time Rin."

"It's alright Rei…but please, at the very least; don't push yourself away when you need help. You're making me look useless you know." I smiled. Rei smiled back and nodded.

"Okay Rin, the next time I need help I'll tell you."

"Then that settles everything Rei. So instead of sulking around, lighten up and enjoy the ball…Okay?" I added while patting him on the shoulder. It was kind of a hard pat since he almost fell over much to his annoyance.

"Now you've done it Rin!"

"Hahaha! See you're finally lightening up Rei." I laughed while running off. A lot of people were looking at us like we were two children playing around in the park but I didn't care.

Seeing him this happy was alright for me.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

Who would've thought that the ones causing the noise were them.

"It seems Rin and Rei are having a great time Len." Miku whispered to me. I could only give her a slight nod since I really didn't have the mood right now. It was weird for me to be feeling so upset when everyone around me is enjoying the night.

I wonder why I feel so upset tonight.

"Len you're spacing out again." Miku called out waving her hand in front of my face.

"Was I?" I wondered aloud. Miku sighed and nodded. Was I making her worry again?

"Len you're hiding something from me…Don' lie because I can clearly see it on your face."

"Sorry Miku…I'm just not in the mood tonight." I could only say. This feeling was too confusing, I couldn't understand it. Miku frowned at my answer and quickly looked away to hide her face.

"Why aren't you in the mood Len? We planned this ball so well that I was sure not one moment would ruin our time…You even said yourself that this would be the best night of our lives. So why aren't you enjoying it Len?"

"Miku I-," Before I could even finish what I had to say, Miku quickly got up and left. She was mad and as usual it was my entire fault…

Why am I always making this worse for the both of us lately?

* * *

><p>"Miku! Where are you?" I called out but no one answered. She wasn't in her usual hiding place which was the gazebo which only meant one thing - She didn't want to be disturbed.<p>

"Brother?" I turned around and found Rei looking at me and as usual beside him was none other than Rin.

"What do you want Rei?"

"You seem to be looking for someone brother, do you need some assistance?" He asked. I wanted to say no and leave but I needed all the help I could find if I were to locate Miku.

"Yes I am looking for someone…by any chance did you see Miku anywhere?" Much to my disappointment though, both of them shook their heads in reply.

"But we can look for her if we split up right…We can cover more ground that way." Rin suggested.

"Very well, we'll meet up at the conservatory if we're done searching then." I added before we split up.

Miku…Where are you?

* * *

><p><em><strong>~MIKU~<strong>_

Stupid Len.

The night was so perfect and then out of the blue he's suddenly not in the mood and sulks like a spoiled child. Just what is wrong with him?

"This night was supposed to be special for us…Why did Len have to ruin it?" I sniffled. The stars in the conservatory were supposed to make me smile but tonight not even one star was out to cheer me up.

* * *

><p>"Miku?" I flinched and looked up to find Rei looking at me.<p>

"Rei-Rei-Kun."

"Seriously…stop it with that nickname." He replied slightly irritated. How on earth did he find me?

"I was about to wait for Nii-sama and Rin to meet me when I happened to notice a glimpse of your hair from the conservatory's balcony. It surprised me that neither Rin nor brother saw you."

"Please don't tell Len where I am…" I begged. Rei could only sigh and sat next to me.

"Did you and brother have a fight?" He asked and I nodded. Was it even worth it to tell him my problem? He might not even care about it and tell me off to Len.

"Don't worry Miku…I won't tell." He smiled setting me at ease. I told him what I could, hoping somehow he had answers to them. Rei listened to me and not once did his face show any slight of boredom. When I was finally done, Rei nodded his head and sighed.

"You know Miku; brother was really concerned when you ran off. You should go talk to him and tell him what you feel."

"Would he even listen to me Rei? He was so preoccupied lately that I was worried he wouldn't even listen to what I had to say at all." I confessed and to my surprise Rei laughed.

"Miku, if it's you… Brother will surely listen."

"You mean it?" I asked and he nodded.

"He loves you Miku, don't forget that. No matter what happens he'd do anything to protect that smile of yours." I blushed scarlet at his reply.

"Thanks Rei and as a way of thanks I'll stop calling you Rei-Rei-kun." Again he flinched at the nickname making me giggle. Thanks to Rei, I managed to gather my courage and confront Len.

* * *

><p>"Rei…can you tell Len I'll meet him here." I said before Rei was about to take his leave.<p>

"You sure about this?" Rei asked and I nodded. Courage Miku…as what Rei said, Len would definitely listen to you.

"Very well Miku, I'll go find him and tell you where you are." He replied and left me. As soon as he was gone, I got up from my seat and walked to the balcony's end and breathed in the warm air.

Would Rei be able to find Len for me?

* * *

><p>I didn't know how long I waited but finally Len appeared from the door of the balcony.<p>

"You're late Len." I pouted.

"Sorry Miku…" Len replied. Soon after he said that, silence engulfed us. Somehow that courage I was trying to store seemed to drain away. Maybe I shouldn't have had Rei look for him because right now, neither of us had the courage to talk it out.

"Listen Len I-,"

"I'm so sorry for a while back Miku." Len cut in and then in embarrassment that he cut me off, he quickly looked away.

"I should be sorry too Len…For running off and making you worry and all."

"You shouldn't be sorry at all; it was my fault for making you worry and then ruining the good mood of the ball." He said and then turned to face me with those blue eyes that showed sincerity in his word.

"Remember that promise you made to me Len?" I asked.

"Of course I did, I'd never forget that."

"Really? Prove it to me then." I dared. That promise was made long ago so I had a feeling he might've forgotten it- to my surprise, Len grinned and then pointed up at the empty sky and said in a low whisper;

"When the stars aren't there to cheer you up or when the world turns against you… no matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!"

"Forever?" I asked a hint of doubt in my voice.

"Forever" Len said with a smile.

Just as he said those words, the clouds suddenly drifted away to reveal a million stars shining down on us.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

New words may hide it but it was still the same promise…

"Same promise but to a different person…" I whispered to myself as I watched their figure huddled together in a happy embrace. I should never have followed Len in here- This is what happens when curiosity gets the best of you.

Like they said; 'Curiosity killed the cat.'

"I guess promises were made to be forgotten- well for me that is." I laughed to myself as tears escaped my eyes. Crying and laughing? I must be losing my mind. It was probably to be expected that Len would forget our promise. It was made long before his promise to Lady Miku…and besides, he couldn't keep two of the same promises to two people.

* * *

><p><em>-Flashback-<em>

_**-Seven years ago-**_

"_Len stop it!" I tried to stop them from fighting but the look in Len's eyes made me too scared to do so. _

"_Really Rin? You're so weak, relying on the rich to protect you." Yukio taunted as he lifted Len by the collar and tossed him aside like a rag doll._

"_Yukio stop it! You promised you wouldn't hurt him." I begged as I tried to grab him by the arm to avoid him from hitting Len._

"_Step aside Rin or I'll hit you first." Yukio shouted trying to shake me off. _

"_Hit me all you want! I won't let you hurt Len again." I shouted angrily. _

"_Fine then, you asked for it!" Yukio slammed me to the wall and started hitting me. It was painful I had to admit but I didn't want him to hurt Len. Just thinking Len getting hurt like this if I hadn't stepped in was too painful for me to imagine._

"_Rin!" I heard Len shout after that was the sound of wood snapping into two. Yukio stopped hitting and I opened my eyes to find him collapsed on the ground. He wasn't hurt but just unconscious from the hit so I was glad that Len wouldn't be scolded about hurting an orphan._

"_You know Rin you should leave this orphanage… You're always getting bullied it makes me angry." Len said as he looked at the unconscious body of Yukio._

"_I have nowhere else to go Len…Besides; I'm used to him hitting me." I admitted wiping the blood trickling down my head. Len quickly took out his handkerchief and tied it around my head._

"_Sorry for not being able to protect you Rin- Sorry for being so weak and watch you suffer." Len apologized again and again. _

"_You don't have to be sorry Len- like I said; I'll protect you no matter what." I smiled. Len returned the smile but looked away and towards the distant clouds._

"_I'll change that promise Rin- When I'm old enough… I'll come back and take you away from this dreaded world. I'll take you to a world where no one can hurt you and where you'll always be happy." _

"_No matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!" He added and made a pinkie swear with me._

"_Forever?" I wondered aloud._

"_Forever." He said with a smile_

_-End-_

* * *

><p>He kept that promise and sent me to Miku…his fiancée. I enjoyed my life in Claridan but there were times I wished we went back to the days when we were still in Valice.<p>

The old times when we were still so close.

By the time I moved in to Claridan, Len always came to visit me and Miku. The days where all three of us enjoyed the time running about and laughing like children. But as it wore on to years my conversations with Len dwindled into nothing more but hellos and goodbyes.

Then soon…His promise to me was completely forgotten.

"Forever protecting me and staying by my side?" I wondered to myself as I left them to their own world.

Those words he said to me were nothing to me now but empty promises…

* * *

><p>Here we go with chapter 9! Man I cried so much when I typed this chapter.<p>

I'm such a cruel writer making Rin suffer like this…

Please R&R! I'll do my best to update faster and give Rin her deserved happy ending :)

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	10. Promises and Reasons

Chapter 10 is finally here :)

* * *

><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their repsected owners!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Ten:<strong>**  
><strong>

Promises and Reasons

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

Rin…She looked so upset but she wouldn't tell me the why.

"You can trust me Rin, I won't tell a soul so pl-,"

"Rei, just…just stop. I don't want to talk about it." She cut off and sighed. Her eyes were puffy, meaning she cried over it. I know that I didn't have the right to pry on her affairs but just looking at her and doing nothing was making me look useless.

"Rin…you promised remember? You're not the only one allowed to hear out on other people's problems. When you told me I could lean on you for help, it also meant that you could lean on me when you need help too. Don't keep it to yourself and sulk abou-,"

"What do you know about keeping promises Rei!"

"Their only meant to be broken and replaced! That's all what promises are." She added angrily.

"What you're talking of is empty promises Rin! I never make an empty promise." I countered. She glared at me angrily and was about to storm off- I quickly grabbed her arm and took her away from the dance hall…away from the onlookers who wanted to see what our fight was about.

"Where are you taking me!"

"Where we first met." I replied as I took her to the maze of roses and finally to the white pavilion where I first met her. I let Rin sit on the marble chair waiting for her to settle down.

"Why did you take me here?" She asked her voice in a soft whisper but with a hint of annoyance in it almost like she was sulking.

"To settle this little spat."

"It wouldn't have happened if you hadn't butt into my affairs." She retorted slightly annoyed. I then sat next to her, my hands clasped together and placed on my lap. Her eyes followed my every movement until I looked at her directly forcing her to look away.

"It was a promise so I have the right to butt in."

"I told you before promises were-," She was about to say had I not cut her off.

"-meant to be broken, so on and so forth. Goodness Rin! Does that make our promise a while back useless? Then what was the point of making it if you're just going to talk about how useless it was?"

"It wasn't a promise Rei."

"Give one good reason for it to not be considered a promise?" I asked. Rin thought hard for moment before giving me her answer.

"Because I didn't say 'promise'"

"Promises don't need those kinds of words to make it a promise Rin. Just swearing or vowing to it is what makes it a promise." I answered back.

"Fine! So what we said a while back was a promise, even if I told you what my problem was about…you wouldn't be able to do anything."

"Try me." I dared. Rin was taken aback by my sudden act. I was glad she was though; I wanted her to think I could help her no matter what her problems were.

"Rei, really I think it's best that we-,"

"Rin! You can trust me." I assured her. Rin nodded reluctantly while fidgeting with her gown.

"It's…about a promise, I made with Len."

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I turned to him waiting for a reply.

This was the whole reason why I didn't want to tell him. I tried to make sure we never talked about him whenever we were together. Now I just crossed the line.

"And what promise is that?" Rei asked. His face was unreadable making me even more nervous.

"It was made long before I met you so it's nothing to talk about-,"

"I was asking what the promise was Rin not when it was made." He cut off. What would be his reaction if I told him? Would he be upset? Angry? Or Hurt? I was too afraid to tell him. Why did I even have to tell him about all of this?

"What's with the long pause Ri-," Rei asked.

"To be by my side when I needed him!" I shouted back cutting him off. Silence soon followed making me even more worried. I was afraid to look at him so it was hard for me to tell if he was either angry or just upset. I mustered my strength to look and saw Rei looking down, his reaction hidden by the shadow of the night.

"R-Rei?" I tried to reach out but he just looked away. Was he angry?

"Rin, why are you so upset over something like that?" He asked as he looked at the sky. His eyes were hazy as if he was deep in thought.

"Rei, it was a promise we made back then…he vowed he'd keep it but in the end he failed. Wouldn't you be upset if a friend of yours did that to you too?" I answered back.

"I would but I wouldn't cry about it. He lost a great friend Rin; you didn't lose him…he lost you." Rei looked at me and smiled faintly.

"If he couldn't keep it then let me take his place." He added in a faint whisper.

"You don't have to Rei."

"Why then? Don't tell me that you're still hoping he hasn't forgotten about it." Rei asked with a hint of pain in his voice.

"What's wrong if I hope Rei?"

"It's because I hate when I see you like this! Always suffering…always hoping, so what if he remembers it then? He won't be able to even keep it since he already has someone to protect right? He will swear that oath on the day of their marriage Rin so-," Rei shouted angrily. Now he was angry, just when I thought that we finally understood each other this happens.

"Stop it! I don't want to hear any more of this Rei. You said you'd help me but truth be told you're not. So if you have nothing helpful to say then don't say anything at all!" I answered back while getting up. I give up…We're failing at this and there's nothing I can do.

"Wait just a minute Rin!" Rei quickly grabbed me by the arm and pinned me down on the marble chair.

"Re-Rei! What on earth are you doi-,"

"Please Rin hear me out…please." He whispered his face completely unreadable as he lay on top of me. T-this…W-what is he doing! And that anger awhile back…Where did it all go?

"Why do you have to look beyond what you already have Rin? Am I not enough?" Rei asked.

"What are you talking about Rei?" Somehow those words he said struck me. Not enough? I did my best to free him from Len's shadow.

So… what am I missing?

"Reason, Rin…Give me a reason to keep on moving forward." He replied as if he knew what I was thinking.

"I'm trying but still you're not satisfied…What kind of reason do you even want!" I asked…no pleaded to him. Rei, what kind of reason are you really looking for? I gave all that I could think of. What else do you want from me? It's all too confusing that I'm losing my mind here.

"I don't know either! That's why I'm asking you Rin. I'm confused and I don't know what to do anymore." As soon as he said those words, something wet brushed against my cheek.

Was he crying?

"I'm sorry okay - I don't know what to answer back either. I'm as confused as you are right now Rei…I don't even know what my reason is either." I murmured. All this time, Len was the sole reason I had to move forward…to strive for happiness but right now…after all of this…

Just what is my reason for moving forward?

"Then I'll be your reason Rin." Rei replied. What did he say? Will I bargain all my hope again like last time for a reason?

"If it all goes wrong…I'll have nothing left to give…" I answered back to him with reluctance. Is it worth it? Bargaining whatever hope I have left just to feel it again? To be able to feel complete…To be able to tell myself again that I can still move forward and hope for a future I deserve.

"It won't Rin! I swear on it that I won't fail. Whatever power I have I'll do whatever it takes to protect it." He shouted back. Protect. There it was again- that word; for him to swear on something that ruined me…

"Promise?" I asked taking him by surprise. Strange, suddenly making the same promise to a different person; But I have every right to do so right? Len made the same thing to Miku…so why can't I too?

"I promise Rin so please don't give up on me. I'll be your reason and you'll become mine." He vowed. Me? His reason? I'm making him suffer here and yet he makes me his reason; such a thing, is he really that stupid? To go to such an extent to prove that he can be something Len couldn't- trying to surpass his own brother.

"Tell me one thing Rei…Why do all of this? To such an extent- am I truly worth your reason?" I asked him. Of all people Rei- why me?

"You are Rin- more than you know it. I want you to become my Raison d'être; it means-,"

"Reason for existence…" I continued.

Such a heavy word to carry.

"Rei what if _I _fail you…Are you sure of all this?" I added. He says he won't fail me but what about me failing him? I don't know what will become of us if such a disaster were to happen.

"You won't Rin- I know you won't."

"You believe in me that much?" I asked him. I've let him down countless of times and did my best to fix them. Even after all of it he still trusts in me?

"Is it wrong to trust in you Rin?" He asked me.

"Rei! I've failed you so many times, I did my best to fix them but afterwards…"

"I wouldn't be here right now if you've truly failed me Rin. Remember; 'you're not alone'." He smiled faintly.

Not alone… Was I truly never alone?

"I'm so sorry for being so weak Rei. I'm so useless that I hate it." Tears streamed my face as I told him this. I look so pathetic, always crying, always relying on others to shoulder my own burdens. I created my own loneliness thinking that I had nothing left to move forward and yet here was Rei, telling me that I was never alone.

"Hey, you don't have to cry. No matter what, I'll protect your smile and prevent it from fading. So Rin; smile for me will you?" Rei encouraged me. I did my best and somehow I managed to force a slight smile.

"Thanks Rei."

"For you Rin…I'd do anything."

"Really now?" I asked and he nodded.

"Of course. Just say the word and I'll do it." Rei grinned.

"Mind getting off me then?" I asked him. It took him a minute to digest the words but when he saw my face below him; he quickly turned scarlet red and got off me.

"You are just like a little kid you know that Rei, hehehe~." I giggled.

"Stop it Rin! It's not funny at all." Rei replied, slightly embarrassed and annoyed. At least our _little_ argument is finally over. I hope that this will be the last, it'd just hurt us more if things like this always happen.

Please do not let the happy moments that come by be nothing more but short-lived happiness.

* * *

><p>"Go Rei! I just need to settle some matters. I'll meet you at the dancehall by the time I'm done with it." I said as I pushed him in the room. He was reluctant to leave, thinking that I might still be upset over our little fight, but I assured him it that I was not upset about it.<p>

"Make sure you're back before twelve Rin." He replied and handed me his gold pocket watch to make sure that I didn't forget.

"I'll be back Rei so don't worry." I smiled and walked away after saying 'good-bye' and 'I'll be back' to him. I had to go back to that place, it hurts me to do so but I had to tell myself;

That it was time to let it go.

I looked at the building, still unsure whether or not I was ready for it. Taking in a deep breathe, I opened the door of the building and ascended its steps quietly; afraid that maybe he was still there with her and that they'd hear footsteps and look out to find me. As I reached the last step, I saw the balcony empty; no one was in here except for me. I sighed in relief and walked towards the balcony's end and looked at the night sky full of stars.

Again, Gemini was nowhere to be seen that night.

"Looking for Gemini again Rin?" I spun to the source of the voice and found Len leaning by the balustrade.

"Such a shame though that it's not out tonight. I rarely see it nowadays. " I replied partly surprised by his sudden appearance and here I thought that they had finally left the area.

"It actually is. if you look carefully you can still see Castor and Pollux." Len replied while getting up and then looking at the sky as well.

"I guess Gemini is getting too far for me to see it clearly now." I admitted. Len chuckled and pointed at the two bright stars that were shining beside each other.

"The stars never move Rin; look they've been there since the first time we saw it."

"I guess so; Maybe, I'm just forgetting where it is that's all." I replied the moment I finally caught sight of the stars.

"Well that's odd; you were always the one reminding me where and how to find it."

"It's been so long since I last saw it…" I mumbled while leaning by the railings of the balcony. It's been a month since the accident…months since I last looked up at the sky, looking for the star that only belonged to us- but tonight…this'll be the last time I'll be looking at it;

Because this star no longer belonged to us but them.

"I have to go Len. Rei might be getting worried now." I finally said while checking the pocket watch.

"Rei?"

"Yeah, he told me to be back before midnight. He tends to get worried sometimes so I have to hurry back." I said while placing the watch back in my pocket.

"Rei worrying? Hmmm…Rei's changed huh. He was never concerned about other people other than me or Miku; surprised me that he finally started talking to other people besides us." Len replied slightly surprised.

"Yeah I guess you can say that he's changed a bit."

"I owe it all to you Rin, so thanks." Len smiled.

"But I'm just curious~ are you and Rei like an item? For you to change him that much is really odd…unless you are his lov-,"

"W-what! Rei's a very close friend of mine Len. W-why would you think of such a thing?" I almost shouted out of embarrassment.

"Hahaha! Oh Rin, your face is priceless." Len laughed.

"Geez! Len…do not joke around like that." I pouted while placing my hands to my hips. Len raised his hands in surrender, telling me that he was sorry. There are really times that Len never failed to act like an annoying little kid.

"Not a lover then? Then what is Rei to you?" Len wondered making me blush redder.

"H-hey your still up to it! Seriously Len, enough with this nonsense thought. Rei is a very close friend of mine. Surely as his older brother, Rei would have told you about our relationship if ever there was something more right? Since he has not as I can see, then it only means that there is nothing more going on between us."

"No need to explain too much Rin. Goodness! You've never changed at all." Len said while putting up a smile.

"But don't you miss these kinds of things Rin…The fun times; time moves just too fast." Len added. Somehow his tone changed; it was almost like he was reminiscing.

"Say Len…Where is Mistress Miku? It's rare for me to find you here alone. She usually stays by your side except when you're out of town." I asked, changing the topic. I missed those times- I really do but I already decided to let go.

So whatever happened before I have to do my best to forget it.

"Miku wanted to meet with her parent's friends. She went ahead of me but she was very upset about me wanting to stay longer, she may even be still upset till now."

"Well then you better hurry to her side then- before she runs back here and drag you there." I joked. Finally, a slightly more normal conversation between us, truly I am finally moving forward.

"But how about you Rin? Did you not say that Rei would be worried had you not made it back to the hall before his curfew?" Len reminded me. I quickly pulled out Rei's watch and noticed that five minutes have passed since Rei's curfew.

"I am late! So late, Rei will be upset with me. I'm sorry Len but I have to go."

"Then I'll come with you. Miku might be looking for me as well." Len replied as he walked pass by me.

"Aren't you in a hurry?" Len added as he turned to me.

* * *

><p>"I'm starting to regret heading back too early now." Len said when we finally exited the conservatory. First he says that he wants to go back to Miku, and then the next minute he starts to get nervous and decides to go back. Seriously, he needs to be firm in his decisions.<p>

"Why are you regretting? You decided to accompany me back right? Backing out is very unbecoming of a gentleman Len." I reminded him. Len frowned as if the comment was like a slight slap to his pride.

"I would never decline to accompany you Rin. It's just that…it's Miku. If I return to her this late- She'll be upset and ignore me the whole night."

"Afraid of Mistress Miku eh? Have you become this weak as the years wore on Len? Whatever happened to you being the braver one of us both?" I giggled while watching his worried expression. I sighed when I noticed that he wasn't properly listening.

"In front of all those people, I doubt that she'd ignore you. Besides, she acts less childish in front of others unlike some people I know of." I assured him but with a slightly playful insult in it to sheer him up. It took him a few minutes to comprehend who I meant but when he got it…he was definitely not happy about it.

"Ch-childish! Whatever made you think that I acted childish in front of others?" Len shouted.

"I never said that the person was you Len. I just said 'some people' not 'Len'." I taunted playfully.

"Now you've done it Rin! Prepare to be punished." Len raised his hands into a strange formation. A strange aura was emitting out of him. Did he finally snap?

Did I overdo it too much?

"W-what kind of pose is that Len." I asked while taking a step back while I positioned both my hands in a cross formation. Len moved forward as if waiting for me to make a very wrong move.

"Prepare for your punishment Rin! Prepare to be tickled to death." Len shouted as he tried to catch me. A tickle fight? Truly Len still acts too childish but….This is just outrageous.

"Are you doing this to avert the idea of ever walking back to Miku!" I shouted but he wasn't listening. I dodged him again and steadied myself.

"Len! Stop it already, this is just too childish!" I said panicking, I never could get away from him when he starts acting up like this and during these times its best I just run away till he gets tired of it and give up.

"Get ready Rin!" Len shouted making me step back as quickly as I could. Had I made a mistake Len would have caught me by the hem.

"You'll never catch me!" I replied adding it with loud laughter as if all my problems just disappeared into oblivion. I ran away as fast as I could, made a sharp turn to the left and skidded straight into Rei forcing both of us to trip and slam to the ground.

"What in heavens were you thinking, running blindly like that Rin?" Rei asked worriedly as he helped me up. I did my best to explain to Rei my problem but my heart was beating too fast that I was almost gasping for air.

"Rin!" Len shouted from across the hall. I hid behind Rei as I watched Len approaching us.

"Forgive me Rei!" I shouted to him, Before Rei could ask what the problem was I was already gone from his sight.

Why did I even get myself into this mess?

* * *

><p>"You won't be able to get away Rin!" Len laughed. Wait, now he's laughing? What is so fun about running around the dance hall in circles acting like a bunch of children who were deprived of playtime when they were young? Truly he is becoming demented.<p>

I ran as quickly as my feet allowed me arriving at the garden. Luckily, I spotted a huge bush just the right size for a person with my body frame to hide in. I made no hesitations and hid behind it waiting for Len to pass by. Minutes later, Len came running out of the corner and passed by my hiding place.

"Finally, I lost him." I sighed in relief as I stepped out of my hiding place. He seems to be enjoying this too much that it's annoying me. So he feels insulted by what I said? It doesn't excuse him from acting like a demented person.

"Caught you!" Len shouted while his two hands wound around me. I struggled from his grasp but in doing so, it sent us tumbling down - towards the row of rosebushes.

* * *

><p>I half-opened my eyes and saw myself covered in rose petals. My white dress was slightly torn and covered in dirt while my hair was messy and covered in leaves.<p>

"Oh! Now you've done it Len, my dress is ruined. Rei will be very upset!" I shouted angrily as I vainly tried to clean off some of the dirt. Len just laughed as if tormenting me was a natural thing for him to do.

"Are you even listening Len?"

"Relax Rin! You look fine. You were never this uptight before."

"That was before Len! As the son of the duke of Valice, you should know when to act like an adult." I chided while he sat up.

"My life's becoming too suffocating Rin. Weren't you the one who always told me that I have to spend my life as how I wanted it? Well I want it to have a little fun in it, not having to follow those orders once in a while. Life's just too short, so I have to enjoy it to the fullest right?"

"Well that's a very mature answer coming from a kid like you."

"Well thank you very much for your kind compliments Rin." Len replied while he got up. He was about to extend his hand to help me up when he suddenly froze as if listening for something.

"What's wrong Len, why did you suddenly-," Len quickly covered my mouth and kneeled closely to me.

"Whumph ifs wrumpfs wif fyump!" I tried to shout.

"Shh! They'll hear you Rin." Len whispered. Seconds later, two pairs of footsteps made their way by the maze. Len and I did our best to keep quiet while we watched the two figures walk by. It was too dark to see their faces but it was noticeable that one was a woman and the other was a young kid. They seemed to be carrying a lot of things as they passed us by.

"Nee-san! These flowers are too heavy." The young boy, judging by his voice, said to the woman walking next to him. The voice sounded very familiar, like I've heard it before.

"Here let me carry some for you Piko." The woman replied while she placed her cargo on the ground. She called the boy Piko…could it be that the woman is Meiko?

"Where do you think you're going?" Len whispered as I fumbled to get up.

"I know them Len so don't worry."

"Wait Rin-," Len grabbed me by the arm but his pull was too strong that I stumbled forward while dragging him with me.

"Rin! Is that you?" I looked up and sure enough, Meiko was looking down at me with a worried look plastered across her face.

"Goodness Rin! What did you do to your gown?" She added worriedly while helping me up.

"It's nothing Meiko, besides the party will be ending soon anyways. No one will notice me in this mess since its dark already." I could only force up a smile as I told her more of what happened. Meiko took it in well while passing glances at Len who was busy talking to Piko.

"Neh~ Rin, isn't he Len Kagamine, the son of Valice's duke?" Meiko whispered to my ear. I nodded in reply while following Meiko's gaze. Piko was busy talking to Len about Miku and the mansion. Len would reply but the smiles he gave Piko looked forced as if he wasn't enjoying this conversation at all.

"Neh~ Len, when you become a duke does it mean that you get to have many wives?" Piko asked taking us all by surprise. Wh-where did he have the courage to put up a question like that?

"W-what on earth are you talking about!" Len replied turning red.

"Well there's a duke I heard of once that had ten wives; the people in his town said that it was because he was a duke that he could have many wives…So I thought that…" Piko wondered aloud. Len glared daggers at him from behind as if he was going to strangle him then and there.

"L-Len he just misunderstood it no need to be mad…" I tried to explain.

"H-he just insulted my relationship with Miku! He deserves to be-,"

"So Rin have you made a decision yet?" Meiko quickly interjected to change the topic.

"Decision? About what?"

"Oh! I must've forgotten to tell you about it Rin." Meiko giggled. Okay….I think she's gone too far with the changing the topic thing.

"A day from now you and I will be going overseas. There's this town somewhere in the continent of Fenmyrrh that sells beautiful breeds of flowers. The shop keeper there agreed to sell some of his seeds to us but I have to talk with him about it first before I agree."

"Why me? Couldn't Kaito or Piko accompany you, I still have much to learn." I replied. Overseas with Meiko? It's been long since I last travelled on a ship.

"Kaito's watching the shop with Piko. Besides, this is to test you out right Rin."

"I suppose…how long will we be staying there anyway?" I asked.

"Probably a week since the travel there takes about a day and the owner's out of town and won't be back in four days… I might not be able to accompany you all the time while we're there so I suggest you bring someone along."

"Me! Can I please come too Meiko nee-chan!" Piko begged but Meiko shook her head.

"Sorry but no, someone has to keep an eye on the shop and that _flirtatious_ man Kaito." Meiko said while emphasizing flirtatious. It looked like Meiko wanted Piko to keep an eye on Kaito more than the shop itself.

"I know maybe Rei can come along with us." I suggested.

"I'm sure Rei would enjoy it there too. Remember to tell him that we leave on the day after tomorrow okay." Meiko reminded me and I nodded in agreement. I can't wait to tell Rei all about this. A trip with just the three of us, it'll be very exciting.

"Don't forget to tell him Rin! I'll see you tomorrow then to talk about the arrangement okay Rin." Meiko replied while lifting the boxes again and said good-bye as she walked away with Piko.

"I doubt it that Rei would be able to come." Len suddenly blurted out.

"What are you talking about? Rei is sure to come…I'm sure of it."

"Then why is there a tone of hesitation in your voice? If you trust Rei then you have to believe in him right? Since it almost looks as if I'm already replaced as your best friend, Right Rin?" Len smiled. Where is this conversation heading off now?

"I don't doubt Rei and his actions, I have nothing against him. He's a good friend so I'll understand if he can't come." I admitted flashing him a smile as well.

"I have to go now Rin; Miku might already be worried about me… Thanks for enjoying this night with me though."

"You're welcome Len; I have to go too since Rei might be looking for me as well." I replied while watching him walk back first.

"Rin." Len called and stopped walking.

"Yes Len?"

"If Rei can't come…You can always ask me i-if it's alright with you. I'm not forcing you to accept just consider it as my last time becoming your best friend and accompany you like last time." Len replied while refusing to turn around and face me.

"It's fine by me Len! But make sure you ask Mistress Miku's permission first."

"Heh~ sure I'll tell her." Len said before waving good-bye and running off. Even if we've been childhood friends there are just some times I could never understand Len. There are times his actions never fail to take me off guard but that what I used to like about him. He always makes me want to anticipate what will happen tomorrow.

"You were never replaced Len…I still consider you my precious friend…I just need to fix my own path first before I try to find the answers to correct this mess." I murmured to myself while walking back to the dance hall.

When the time comes…I'll tell you all of this for sure.

* * *

><p>Finally done! Whoo! I tried to make it as long as I could since this is the tenth chapter. Thanks so much for all the views and comments guys! It makes me want to work harder on it more ;)<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	11. Past and Present

Chapter 11 Finally Updated Sorry for the suuuuper long update!

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><p><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!

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><p><strong>Chapter Eleven<strong>**  
><strong>

Past and Present

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"What do you mean you can't come!" I shouted angrily that my voice echoed in the entire mansion. I quickly clamped my mouth shut when I realized that the whole household was looking at the both of us.

"I'm truly sorry Rin but I was already asked by the Duke of Burmyn to attend a political meeting tomorrow. If I could have my way, I would've declined his offer but father has been ill for some time that he is in no condition to travel."

"What about Len? Why couldn't he be the one to attend the meeting?" I asked and as soon as I said that Rei frowned and looked away. I had completely forgotten what Rei and I had discussed; that no matter what, Rei would never become Len's shadow.

"I'm sorry if you're mad but I wanted to do this…" He replied.

"Rei…It's not your fault, I was so sure of myself that you'd be coming so I was kind of disappointed when you declined. I'm sorry for saying those things without understanding your feelings." I assured him. After our promise the night before…I was now afraid of committing any mistakes against him. He made me his reason so I have to do my best to assure him that I wasn't failing him.

"I understand what you feel Rin…I'm sorry too, for not being able to be there when you need me."

"No it's my fault. It seems that I'm breaking our promise again."

"H-hey you don't have to make yourself look bad. Besides, I'm not mad at all." Rei smiled but I wasn't sure now if what he put up in front of me was either fake or real.

"But if I'm not able to come…then who will you come with? You did tell me that there might come times that Meiko might not be able to accompany you. Won't you feel lonely?" His voice suddenly showed a hint of worry. I could only return him a slight smile and assure him that I'd be fine on my own.

"I think I can manage myself Rei so don't worry about me and worry more of your work. Remember it's your first time so you have to leave a good impression on them."

"I'll try Rin…just make sure you get there safely and come back here quickly." Rei said and ruffled my hair furiously.

"Hey! I just fixed my hair Rei!" I pulled his hand away and tried to get back at him. Rei tried to step back but he missed his footing and tried to grab me, making him trip on the carpet and send a few vases falling to the ground before falling onto the ground with me following in.

"What was that noise just now?" Miku rushed to the scene and gasped at what she saw. Rei was on the ground and on top of him was me, our faces inches from each other.

"My Rin…so very straightforward." She giggled.

"No Mistress Miku, do not misunderstand this! It was an accident." I replied turning bright red as igot off of Rei.

"Aaah…Rei's first love! Oh how romantic~ A forbidden love." Miku sighed dreamily. What on earth is inside her mind? Spouting such nonsense about forbidden love.

"F-forbidden love? Miku, please do not make such statements!" Rei added.

"Why are you being so defensive?" She smiled slyly.

"I am not being defensive!" Rei shouted embarrassingly.

"It is obvious from your expression that you are being defensive. Oh Rin, you lucky girl! Imagine getting married to Rei…that would make us related oh how lovely!" Miku shouted happily.

"Married! Don't you think it's a bit too early to be thinking about that?" I replied.

"Who is getting married?" Just when things were finally settling down Len suddenly pops into the scene.

"Don't you think they make a beautiful couple Len? I was expecting her to be with Piko but seeing her act with Rei like this is just too adorable…especially back at the ball. I can't help but pair them together!"

"Wh-what! W-with Piko? He's just like a brother to me." I added.

"Do not mention that kid's name again!" Rei countered and regretted it later when he saw the look plastered all over Mistress Miku's face.

"Do I hear the bitter tone of jealousy Rei?" Mistress Miku said and ran directly in front of Rei while she placed her hand at the back of her ear. Len approached me with a smirk on his face while Miku and Rei were busy arguing.

"So… You and Rei eh?"

"What are you talking about Len? Don't tell me you believe all that you've heard?" I groaned. Why does everyone think that Rei and I have something going on between us?

"Miku tends to overreact so it's hard to know if she's telling it correctly or not. But I know you meant it back at the conservatory that you and Rei weren't an item so I believe you. After all, you're a very bad liar sometimes." He grinned. I frowned at his remark but I was glad at the very least that he trusted my words.

"Will you really be alright tomorrow Rin?" Rei asked when he managed to distract Mistress Miku away from the room. Len raised a brow as he looked at the both of us. A sure sign that he wanted to know what was going on.

"Don't worry Rei; I'll be fine on my own. Besides I can explore the town when Meiko's not around, that way I won't feel lonely."

"So Rei can't come with you to the trip huh?" Len asked. I nodded and explained Rei's trip to Burmyn and how I won't have any company on the days Meiko won't be around.

"Maybe I should come…" Rei trailed off but I assured him again that I'll be fine. Really how can this man ever hope to succeed his brother when he keeps worrying about me too much?

"Well if Rei can't come; I guess I'll accompany you then." Len suddenly added.

"What are you talking about broth-,"

"Well you see Rin and I had a little talk. That if you failed to accompany her then she can ask me to accompany her there. Since I'm free anyways, why don't I be her escort there?" Len interjected as if his idea was a good one.

"You needn't have to accompany her brother. I trust Rin's words that she can handle things by herself." Rei replied while turning to me for an explanation, his tone sounded slightly irritated making me worry.

"Yes. Rei's right Len, I'll be fine on my own." I added. Len looked upset for that short moment before he reverted back to his usual attitude as if an idea had suddenly struck him.

"If she had an escort tagging along then the boys won't approach her, that way you don't have to worry about a thing Rei."

"I'm more afraid of you accompanying her rather than the boys." Rei muttered to himself.

"What about Mistress Miku? She definitely would not agree to this kind of action." I said.

"Miku would never object to such actions when it concerns you." Len replied. True, Mistress Miku was very overprotective of me when we were young so she wouldn't mind Len keeping an eye on me. Even if I get Mistress Miku to side with me, Len would always find a way. He's just like Rei after all, too stubborn.

"Rei, What do you think? Shaking Len off seems kind of impossible." I asked Rei. He sighed loudly and quickly admitted defeat, I guess even Rei couldn't handle his own brother too.

"Do I look like have any options left? Why did you even agree to something like this without my consent? I agree to this idea, but please… take care of yourself when you're with him Rin." Rei warned me. Why did he look worried when he told me those? Rei seemed like he was hiding something from me.

Something I don't know about Len.

"You know very well what I meant brother; I'll never forgive you if something happens to her." Rei added when he turned to Len. Len just gave him a smile and watched Rei walk out of the room.

"Heh~ I wouldn't forgive myself either if I failed again too." Len murmured to himself. Somehow his cheery attitude faded after everyone was gone.

I wonder why?

"Hey are you alright? Whatever happened to your cheery attitude a while back?" Len snapped back to look at me and smiled. It was the fakest smile I had ever seen in all my life that it made me scared. This is the first time I'm seeing this kind of reaction from him.

"What are you talking about Rin? I'm perfectly fine." He chuckled.

"No you are not! And that smile proves it."

"And what about my smile?" Len asked still unable to hide that smirk on his face.

"It's not like you…to smile like that- it makes me worried, it's like you're hiding something from me."

"Whatever made you think of that idea? Can you not trust me?" He wondered. I trusted him well enough but…even the closest of friends can sometimes doubt one another. I haven't been with Len for quite a long while now that I'm not sure what kind of person he has become. Sure we have been childhood friends for a long time but that was before. The past is different from the present, a lot of things change and that counts our friendship.

"I trust you Len but not like before…I'm sorry. It's just that, so many things have happened that we barely have the time. Time moves too fast and before we know it everything has changed…there's no going back, the bonds shared and created, the times enjoyed…well their all in the past already. There's no reliving them now, no way of knowing if what was there will still be there." I admitted to him. Len could only give me a half-hearted smile and laughed.

"This is not a laughing matter Len! Do you even understand what I'm trying to say is-,"

"I hear you Rin and of course I understand it. Isn't that the reason why I asked you to invite me? You're not the only one thinking about it." Len interjected.

"I know…" Was all I could say, we're in the same boat after all. Searching for the conclusion to all of this…

"Then enjoy it alright, this trip is more like a reunion and remember Rin; I still haven't forgotten those words you've told me that day."

"What are you talking ab-," Before I could finish my sentence, Len mouthed something to me…something I had been hoping he had forgotten by now. I knew that saying that back then was a bad idea, I was hoping that he would have at least forgotten about it but it turns out that he _clearly_ remembers it.

"Never expected me to remember it huh Rin?" He grinned making me turn red from complete embarrassment.

"H-how sure are you that I even mouthed those words?" I defended. Maybe if I pretended that I mouthed something else then maybe he'd think of it to be that. That was truly a very terrible idea for me to do.

"Then what was it you were trying to tell me then? What other word could you have possible thought to mouth to me on that day besides 'I love you'?"

"Colourful." He eyes grew wide with surprise when I told him my answer.

"Colourful?" He repeated and I nodded. I mouthed it to him to prove to him that they had the same form when mouthed.

"Well I guess it was my mistake…but really Rin, who on earth would say 'colourful' on the day she leaves? Wouldn't that person want to make an impression, one that'd be etched deep in someone's mind forever?"

"I chose colourful becau-,"

"Never mind about it Rin; I don't need your explanation, the answer is enough for me." Len interjected almost sadly. Was he upset that the word I mouthed to him was colourful? Was he expecting me to tell him that what I had really told him before was a confession? Len should know his status by now…actually I should've accepted his status back then. Now it seems that I made him even more confused of his decision right now.

"Where you expecting something else Len?" Somehow it just tumbled out of my mouth. Here I go again I guess. Always praying for a glimmer of hope… regardless of the real answer already there in front me, ready to slap me as if to tell me that I should just accept it. Len turned away from me and I saw his hand clench into a fist and then loosen up and again he turned to me with a face I was not expecting him to make.

"Hahaha! Just kidding Rin~ why? Expecting me to suddenly turn around and then confess feelings to you. That will never happen!" Len laughed almost childishly when he saw my shocked expression. So it was all a trick? A set-up to get vengeance! And here I was worried that I had confused him with what I said only to be fooled and made fun on.

Somehow it didn't feel funny but…painful. I guess I got mentally slapped already, that I should be giving up on such hopes and move on. What if I admitted to him my feelings back then…would he have chosen me or Mistress? But I was a coward and now here he is- engaged not to me but to my former Mistress. I have to tell myself already that I'm no longer living in the past but in the present. But why can't I let my eyes just open wide enough to see it?

"Are you upset that I fooled you Rin? I'm sorry if I hurt you in any way, it was merely a jest to get even and I meant no ill- meaning." Len apologized. Did he see my expression? How upset I was when I found out that he had tricked me? Come on Rin! Tell him that it was true, just to ease this situation and remove the burden I'm now carrying.

"I-I Uh…Yes that's it. I'm sorry Len for making you worry; I had a terrible day so I easily get upset lately…please forgive me if in any way I made you worry." I bowed in apology. I looked up and for a split second, I saw Len make a face that I couldn't seem to make out- a mask hiding something he wishes for no one to know.

"No I should be the one apologizing for pulling something like that on you."

"Len I-," I tried to speak out what I wanted to say but I bit my tongue. I didn't want to ruin the atmosphere now by asking unneeded questions. It's better for it to remain like this just to keep the short-lived happiness from falling apart. I just accepted his apology with a smile and excused myself before heading out.

Making sure that he did not see the sadness and bitter pain plastered on my face…

* * *

><p>Awww! Why does Len always make her cry! Why am I such a cruel person! But then again all romance stories have to have drama to make it so heart wrenching right Sorry for the long update though when summer ends and college starts well you have less time to write but then again I have to try hard to get it updated right!<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	12. The Truth Hidden

Chapter 12! Sooooooorrrrry for the long update!

* * *

><p><strong><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Twelve<strong>

The Truth Hidden

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"Take care and make sure you both stay safe." Kaito gives me and Meiko a tight hug before giving Len his own good bye too. Mistress Miku gave Len a small kiss on the cheek, wishing him to take care and keep safe. It stung, yes I admit to see them like, so happy and in love…whereas I on the other hand -

"Come back as soon as you can okay Rin." Rei's voice from behind me snapped me back to reality. I was expecting him to leave for Burmyn by now so seeing him here to say good bye made my heart leap with joy. He was willing to at least be a little late just so he could say his farewell.

"Rei… Aren't you a little worried that the duke might not agree with you being late?"

"It doesn't matter, he'll forget about it. I couldn't help but see you off before I go that's all."

"My, my, Rei another bold move for you~" Miku appeared suddenly beside me, looking at Rei with those eyes of hers. Rei cringes at her sight and blushes red making me giggle.

"What's so funny?" Len starts walking towards us. Rei expression suddenly darkens as if a storm had suddenly entered.

Did he and Len have a fight?

I wanted to ask Rei but the moment I tried to, he suddenly approached Len and whispered something to his ears. Len looked at him confusingly making Rei frown and walk away. I tried to catch up to Rei but Len grabbed me by the arm and forced me to face him.

"We have to go, wouldn't want to miss the boat." He said urgently. The boat wasn't set to leave yet so why is he trying to rush me?

"~Len!" Just when I thought that I had no way of escape, Mistress comes in and saves me. The moment Len loses his grip on me, Mistress gives me a wink and I ran as fast as I could and grab Rei by his arm before he could enter the carriage.

"Wait!" I shouted while gasping for air.

"What is it? I haven't got all day!" He barks back at me making me flinch. He looks at me-surprised at his sudden action.

"Sorry…" I apologized. Maybe he's mad because I didn't let him know sooner of my agreement with Len.

"No I should be the one apologizing…it's just that…of all people why him?" He wondered to himself. The moment I was about to give him my reply, Len ran towards us and told of the boat's nearing departure.

"We have to go already." Len said while glancing at his watch but for a split second I saw him eye Rei before turning to me. Rei turned to me with one last look before turning to Len.

"Your promise nii-sama… You made a vow be very careful not to break it." He warned Len before getting in the carriage.

A vow? A vow of what?

* * *

><p>"<em>Your promise nii-sama… You made a vow be very careful not to break it." <em>Rei's words…What did he mean by them? What kind of vow could he be referring to?

"Len…Rei mentioned a vow. What did he mean by that?" I asked, it took Len a while to respond but when he did he looked more confused than I was.

"I'm not sure Rin…I was expecting you to be the one who knew what he was trying to say." Len admitted as we got in the boat.

"He specifically said them to you Len not me, so you should be the one who knows what he's talking about."

"I wouldn't be asking if I knew right." He pointed out.

"True…" I replied. Vow is a promise…a promise for what though? It must be something important that Rei had to remind Len about it… But why did he seem mad about it?

"Well no use worrying about it right?" Len replied suddenly. A sudden change in the topic…what is Len trying to avoid?

"Wait! We should be-,"

"Then what's the point of this vacation if you can't even enjoy a little?"

"Vacation! Len this is not a vacation, this is a-,"

"A vacation! Come one Rin stop being so uptight and enjoy a little. You'll look younger that way." Len laughed. Y-younger! Do I look really that old? I try to feel my face for any signs of wrinkles and when I feel none I suddenly hear Len laugh again

"Stop it! It's not a laughing matter." I shouted embarrassingly. Len raises his hands in surrender but I know he's trying to hold his laughter.

"I'm sorry Rin…it's just been so long." He chuckled.

"So long since I saw you laugh like this." I added, trying to hide the smile creeping up.

"Well, well enjoying the time now are we." Meiko's voice said from behind me.

"Yes we were, and you Meiko, seemed to have spoiled it." Len replied, before getting nearly hit on the face with Meiko's purse.

"Being cheeky now are we, you may be the son of a duke but that doesn't mean that you have to disrespect your elders." Meiko huffed. Len just shrugged at her reply but a smile was tugging from his lips – a sure sign he wasn't sorry for what he did.

*Plip*

A small drop of water fell on my arm making me look up. The sky above was greyish in colour and claps of distant thunder echoed from the far-off parts of the ocean. Before I could comment on the weather, the rain started to pour down fast. Meiko and Len stopped arguing and were now assisting each other in carrying the luggage.

"This way!" Meiko shouted as we ran to the ship's hallways.

* * *

><p>"I'm soaking wet!" Meiko moaned while we waited in our room for the rain to end.<p>

"You're not the only one who is wet Meiko." I pointed out, seeing as I'm drenched in water and shivering from the cold air our room gave off.

"We should take a bath, getting drenched in rainwater might get us sick." Len advised as he handed us our towels.

"Very well, then I'll go first." Meiko volunteered. As we watched her enter the bath room, Meiko turned to us with her face turning slightly red.

"Ummm…shouldn't you both be heading to your rooms now?"

"Aren't we sharing one room?" I wondered. Meiko sighed and pointed at the small bed we were sitting on and then tossed us a key.

"As if we'd fit on such a small bed, now hurry on before we all catch a cold." She replied as she pushed us out of her room.

* * *

><p>"Um…Only one key?" I stared at the small gold key on my palm.<p>

"Is there a problem with that? It's not like we'd do _anything_ right?" Len replied, a smile playing on his lips.

"No! That's not what I meant."

Len just shrugged and turned left, following the numbers engraved on the door.

"It's suite 14 right?" I asked Len. A suite room huh? Why did Meiko stay in such a shabby room when she could afford a suite room like this? Len just nodded and took the key from my hand.

"I guess you're wondering how Meiko afforded such a room for us huh Rin."

"Yeah…but why would she stay in such a poorly kept place, I mean if she had the money then wouldn't she be able to afford one for herself too…Unless-," I quickly spun around to face him.

"What?" Len asked, acting like he was nearly surprised.

"You didn't just kick her out of her own room did you!?" I accused and in that moment Len burst out laughing.

"I'm not that kind of person Rin, and even if I was, I wouldn't even dare to take Meiko's room by force."

"Then how come we have such a fancy room then?" I pointed out.

"I think you already know the answer."

"No I think I don't." I admitted, slightly irritated.

"I'm sure that a duke's son like me has enough money to at least afford a suite like this right."

"Well why didn't you have a room made one for Meiko too then?"

"She refused my offer." He just shrugged as he opened our door and went in.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"Achoo!" Rin sneezed and shivered violently as she wrapped the blanket around her. How would Meiko be able to manage with Rin having a slight fever?

"I never expected you to be the one to catch the flu Rin." I chuckled as I placed a wet folded cloth on her forehead.

"Sorry for spoiling the fun then." She sighed and wrapped the blanket around her tighter. The smell of chicken soup approaching us was a sign Meiko had already finished cooking it.

"Here, they say that it cures fevers, not that I believe in it but at least it's worth a try."

She took the bowl from Meiko's hands and took a sip. The soup tasted good and it wasn't long until she had already finished it.

"Well that's all I can do, but it would be better if you took a long rest right now."

"But what about you Meiko? How will you be able to handle he work without me?" Rin asked worriedly.

"I think I can manage that, besides, what matters to me most is the safety of my employees." She winked before putting Rin to rest and taking her leave.

"If you need me then Rin, I'll be in the other suite." I said while getting my things ready. Rin's eyes popped open and then looked at me.

"Meiko gave us one key, how is it that you have another one?"

"Meiko agreed for me to be the one to pay for our rooms, just to remove the load she would pay for us; I gave your key to her and took mine." I explained and watched her calm herself and settle down.

"Don't worry; I'm just in the other room next to yours." I whispered before taking my leave.

When I opened the door, I saw Meiko leaning by the door looking at the ground.

"I thought you already went to your room Meiko."

"She just your future wife's former maid…but you seem to care for her very much, why is that?" she turned to face me with a quizzical look on her face.

"She's my childhood friend, is it wrong if I worry for her?"

"No it's not."

"Then if you please-," I was about to excuse myself when Meiko suddenly grabbed me by the arm, taking me by surprise.

"In a few months, you'll be married soon. Stop giving false hope to people, not everyone will get what they want but it's better to let them know that, rather than letting them believe in something they know they can't have." She whispered before letting me go and walking away.

* * *

><p>I didn't get what she was trying to tell me.<p>

Who was I giving false hope to?

I sighed as I lay on my bed looking up on the roof. Miku was perfectly happy, I loved every bit of her and I knew I wasn't giving her anything false. Me and Rei may have our differences but I loved him like a brother- and Rin, we're the best of friends, sure I may have gotten mad at her and fired her but I regretted it afterwards, she forgave me but I guess our friendship isn't the same as before now. But isn't this the reason I came with her? To repair the damage I created.

"_Your promise nii-sama… You made a vow be very careful not to break it."_ Rei's warning echoes in my mind? Vow…A marriage vow! That's what he was trying to tell me.

But what's my vow to Miku got to do with this?

"Len…" A soft tap from my door followed by Rin's voice snaps me back to reality.

"Shouldn't you be taking a rest right now?" I tell her when I finally had her settled on the couch.

"I know but I got cooped up all alone in my room so I went here, Meiko would scold me if I went to her but I doubt you would."

"Well you thought wrong though, sooner or later you'll have to go back."

"Y-yeah…I know." She sighed before nearly collapsing had I not caught her.

"My God Rin! Your burning." I shouted alarmingly. I then lifted her to the bed and ran to the bathroom to fetch a cloth and a bowl of water.

* * *

><p>"You really shouldn't over-exert yourself Rin."<p>

"Sorry just wanted to have a company with me, didn't actually bring anything to pass the time."

"I know but please don't make me worry like that."

"Now you're starting to sound like Meiko." She giggled. I sighed and tried to mimic Meiko by placing my hands to my hips and winking.

"I think I can manage that, besides, what matters to me most is the safety of my employees."

"Hahaha, if she finds out about this she'll scold you for sure." Rin laughs before starting to cough again.

"She wouldn't find out unless you told her but I know you wouldn't." I chuckle as I pull the blanket up to her neck. She snuggles warmly and smiles.

"Thanks a lot Len."

"It's to make up for all those sentry duty you've been doing for me back then." I pat her on the head. Just when I was about to lift my hand, I feel Rin's hand on my mine as if stopping me from leaving.

"Len."

"Yeah?"

"I love you." She mumbles before dozing off. Somehow I feel as if my entire body is rooted on the spot. Had she mouthed it I would have mistaken it for colourful again but this time…she had said it to me.

Meiko's words suddenly made me realize what she was trying to tell me.

"Rin…" I stare at her painfully before taking my leave.

I guess now I know how irreparable my damage to you is.

* * *

><p>Soooooooooooo sorrrrrry it took such a long time to update, writer's block keeps getting in the way. I know I promised I'd update as fast as I could but- GAH! I'm so sorry . I'll do the best I can. Again thank you so much for all the reviews and likes, really I appreciate it.<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx**


	13. Anguish

Chapter 13!

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><p><strong><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Thirteen<strong>**  
><strong>

Anguish

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

Complete silence.

That was what it was as we sat down to eat breakfast. My fever had finally run down so Meiko insisted that I at least ate, so that my recovery would be much faster. The moment we bumped into Len as he exited his room, the aura between Meiko and him suddenly grew cold. Somehow, I had accidentally made it worse when I insisted that Len eat with us. Therefore, this is what is happening right now-

The most awkward breakfast I have ever had.

I tried to start a conversation but every time I did, it was either Meiko or Len who would suddenly comment on it, ending the conversation as if the silence was far better than a simple chat.

"The food here is good isn't it Meiko, if Kaito and Piko had come along then I'm pretty sure all the food would have been devoured completely." I said, trying to attempt another conversation. Meiko just nodded as she continued to sip her soup, while Len, seemed more interested in his food than to listen to what I had just said.

"Pray tell me what is wrong with you both!" I nearly shouted angrily, my patience finally tested. Meiko, Len and a few onlookers looked at me with surprised expressions but I did not care. Now that I have Len and Meiko's attention, it is about time I settle this dispute for good.

"Now as I was saying, care to explain why both of you are suddenly avoiding each other?"

"This is none of your business Rin." Len quickly answered. I slammed my hands on the table making both of them flinch. I hated it when they said that I had no right to butt in, no right to speak out when in fact I am already a part of it. Len saying those words to me was like a stab to the back, I spilled out all my worries and secrets to him when we were young and yet he cannot even confide in me about a simple spat. As for Meiko, I thought she trusted me as I did in her. So why can she not tell me these things?

Do they have no faith in me?

"I have every right Len since you already made me a part of it! Now I will ask again, what is wrong with you two?" I tried asking again and this time, Meiko was the one who answered.

"This is between me and Len, Rin. I hope you understand. I don't want to burden you with this problem."

"Do you mean to brush me aside too Meiko?" It was surprising for her to say that I had no right in the mess they had both concocted. Did I not deserve at least a small right to know what is happening? Did I not deserve their trust?

"We do not mean to brush you aside Rin, it's just-,"

"That I have no right because it is not my fight is that it Len? Is that what you are trying to tell me?" I interjected.

"No that is not what I meant Rin! Listen when I am trying to talk to you okay." He nearly shouted back taking me by surprise. Meiko quickly stood up and eyed Len angrily making him turn to her.

"What? You think I have it easy, this all your fault and you know that!" Len angrily said to Meiko. Her fault…what did Len mean by that?

"My fault, tell me Len, how much do you value her? Your fiancée I mean. Looking at things, the longer this trip goes on, the less you seem to notice it." Meiko added in, her voice getting louder. Len's face grew red with anger as he glared daggers at Meiko, had I not butted in then he would have surely hit her.

"Len stop! Do not make the situation harder than it is now." I tried to say while stopping Len, my anger finally turning into concern. Len brushed my hold on him and glared at me.

"You think I'm the one making the situation even harder? Don't joke with me Rin, you're the one who started this in the first place."

"W-what are you ta-talking about Len?" I nearly faltered, surprised by the venom in his voice. It took only a few seconds before Meiko jumped in and slapped him in the face. A few collected gasps and mutters brought me back to reality. I tried to stop Meiko but she had already started screaming at Len before I could even say my side.

"Don't drag Rin into this Len! She's your friend for god's sake."

"Friend… Heh, when did we become friends?" He wondered aloud as he turned to me.

"As I recall, Rin had told me that we were nothing more but acquaintances. Therefore, you have no right to tell me that I can or cannot drag Rin into this mess Meiko. Seeing as she wanted to be part of it in the first place." He said to Meiko.

"W-who are you?" I suddenly blurted out, making him turn back to me with a smile on his face. This is not Len…what happened to him? I no longer see him in this person standing before me.

"Who am I Rin? Why, I am Len Kagamine, your acquaintance, remember." He smiled a smile so fake that it frightened me.

"Len, what the hell are you doing!" Meiko grabbed him to face her but Len slapped her hold off with the back of his hand.

"Don't you dare touch me, by now; you should already know where you stand." He said angrily and left.

* * *

><p>"What did I do wrong Meiko, tell me, what made Len into that?" I asked her while we watched the dolphins following us at the side of the ship.<p>

"It's not you Rin…it was me." She said quietly.

"But he blamed me didn't he, why do you say it was your fault he turned into that?"

"Because…"Meiko bit her lip as she looked at me.

"You're hiding something from me aren't you Meiko?"

"I'm sorry Rin but truly, if I told you then this situation would get even more difficult for the both of you." She admitted before turning back to the sea.

"I'm not getting you Meiko. What do you mean more difficult for us?" I tried to ask again but Meiko shook her head.

"I'm in no position to tell you Rin. Len alone can tell you that." She replied.

"Len hates me right now Meiko. I doubt that he'd want to listen to me right now." I frowned but Meiko only smiled.

"He's prideful sometimes Rin. He must've screamed at you like that because he wanted to prove to you something."

"Prove to me what Meiko? He did not have to prove anything to me. He has everything- the money, the adoration…Miku. What else does he want?"

"What he wants Rin is the forgiveness of his friend." She answered. Len wanted forgiveness. Reconciliation for what he did is that what Meiko was trying to say. That I guess is what must have hurt him. When I announced to him that he was nothing more but my acquaintance, I never really realized what Len felt back then. I guess my own anger and resentment for him hating me and for not…choosing me, made me blinded to my own pride. That must be why he is mad at me.

He was right…it was my fault.

"Meiko, I think I'll go apologize to him. Tell him I'm sorry for saying those things back then and that I was nave to even understand his feelings." I said. Meiko sighed and then nodded.

"Go and speak with Len. Reconcile with him. And tell him…tell him I was sorry for what I did awhile back." Meiko told me before giving me a tight hug.

"Meiko…"

"I just want you to be happy. I'm sorry." She whispered as she let me go.

"I'm already happy Meiko, being with the people I love- that's what makes me happy." I tell her and Meiko smiles.

"Then go Rin, just promise me, that when you ever get into trouble, just know that I'm here okay." I nod at Meiko's final words before I run and look for Len.

* * *

><p>It was almost seven in the evening when I found Len by the deck of the ship.<p>

He looked deep in thought when I approached him, so he did not see me until I got close enough for him to notice my shadow. The moment our eyes met, Len quickly looked away and stared at the ground.

"I was looking all over for you; you had me worried for a minute when-,"

"What do you want Rin?" Len interjected as he turned to me. He was definitely still mad.

"I want to apologize." I replied, trying as hard as I can from not shaking.

"Apologize? Tell me, how much do you mean that Rin?" He asked me his tone mellowing down. He did not seem mad now; he looked almost tired as if his anger awhile back had suddenly subsided until there was almost nothing left.

"I mean it Len."

"You're not lying now are you?"

"Did I ever lie to you?" I reminded him and this time he looked away from me.

"Yes Rin, you lied to me. And I never expected that that lie would be the worst lie you have ever told me."

"I don't get it Len? What lie are you-,"

"Colourful…" He murmured and then looked at me.

"That's not what you were trying to tell me back then before you left. Am I right Rin?" He added. I could not reply as his sapphire-blue eyes looked bore deep into mine, reading my soul, wondering how I would react.

"Len I-,"

"I love you…Those were the words you mouthed back then. Don't deny it Rin, you yourself told me that the other night."

"I never told you anything Len." I reminded him and Len shook his head

"In your sleep Rin, you told it to me when you fell asleep in my room." That night I had a fever, so Len must have heard me say something before he left. How much more secrets did I suddenly mutter in my sleep? How much more did Len know about them?

"Well Rin, am I wrong?" He asked me and I shook my head, he did not look surprised so it must mean that he was expecting that answer but I knew that even if he knew he would never call it off for me. I never should have said it to him back then, we would not be in this position had I never admitted my feelings. Len was already happy with Miku, he chose her not me- it was always her never me.

"And what if I told you that you weren't?" I asked back, my voice quivering. He looked at me sadly as if he was trying to feel my pain but I knew he did not feel what I felt.

"I'm sorry Rin…I never should have come. Rei warned me and I refused to listen." He was at the railings now, gripping the steel bar tightly as he looked up.

"It's no one's fault but my own Len. I should've known my place…" I admitted painfully as I looked up at the sky too. Again, Gemini was nowhere to be found; the clouds had hidden it again, ready to pour down the rain that was almost like my tears.

"You deserve someone better Rin, not me. You have to move on…"

"That's what makes it painful Len! There is no one better, no one like you! That is why I cannot move on. It's eating me inside and it hurts!" I cried back at him making him flinch. Now I know why he was so upset awhile back. He found out but he was afraid to tell me…afraid to hurt my feelings. He should not be though, every moment he spends loving her is like a bullet to my chest, a bullet that does not kill me but eats me up until I am completely incapable of anything else.

"Rin! You have to let go, I cannot bear to see you hurting like this. Don't destroy yourself Rin…let go." He placed both hands on my shoulder, forcing me to face him. He was begging now, his faced looked in pain. Seeing me like this- it was too much for him to bear.

"I-I can't Len, it's too hard…" I replied hoarsely. Len was shaking his head as he let me go. I hugged him tightly, refusing to let go. Was it cruel of me to be at least this selfish? Even for at least a while, that he would stay this close to me, to feel how much he meant to me?

"I'm being too selfish am I Len? We have been together since we were little kids, made me hopeful that because it was just us you would soon realize my feelings for you. However, the moment Miku came, I knew it could not be…"

"I'm sorry…" He whispered into my ear as he pulled me back, that small magic drifting away as he did.

"Never like this Rin…were friends and that is all it is ever going to be between you and me. I'm sorry." He added as he looked away from me. Nothing more nothing less, I will be nothing to him but his friend.

"That's why Rin, let go…" He pleaded again, his hands clenched into a fist. He was trembling, he was afraid to see me hurting because of him.

"How many times do I have to tell you that I can't Len? I am afraid to let go, it is as if I am holding a live wire. It hurts but I just cannot let go, I do not care if I am chasing nothing but air Len! I'd rather die than let go."

"Do not say that! You hear me; do not hurt yourself any more than this Rin. Please, for me, do not waste your life away like this!" He shouted at me.

"Do not let me lose you again." He cried.

"Len I-,"

"Onegai Rin…" He begged. It hurts so much to hear him say that. As if there was no hope left, not even a shard of it. He pleaded to me as a child would plead for his lost toy back.

"If I let go Len…would you be happy now? Would you continue to smile as I drown in the depths of my own pain and resentment?" I added bitterly.

"Who are you!? You are no longer the same girl I shared my life with when I was young. Your sweet smiles, that laughter that brought life to the house…Where did it go. Tell me, why are you covered in so much regret Rin?" Len wondered making me stop. What have I become to Len then? My own regret turned me like this…in Len's eyes I have become nothing but a monster.

"I-I-," I trembled and ran, refusing to turn when Len called my name.

I was too afraid to face him now; he has seen who I am now and I have stabbed him too many times than I stabbed myself. I cannot face him like this…

The monster that I have become…

* * *

><p>So sorry it took so long but I updated as fast I could, Thank you so much for those who rated and commented I really appreciate it!<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	14. Uninvited Welcome

****Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!**

* * *

><p><strong>C<strong>**hapter Fourteen****  
><strong>

Uninvited Welcome

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

I opened my eyes and sighed.

"Gods, what have I done." I told myself the third time. She's probably still crying right now…all because of me. I gave her too much false hopes that she became blinded to the truth. Maybe she was right, I was too naïve to ever understand the situation I have put myself in to.

*Knock, Knock!*

Consecutive knocks on my door forced me back to reality.

"Len? Are you there, it's me Meiko." The moment I heard her voice, my entire body froze. Did she find out I wonder? Of what happened between Rin and me. If she did, then she'd kill me if I ever opened the door. Nevertheless, I guess I deserved it, after all, it was my fault Rin got hurt.

I opened the door waiting for my fate but froze when I saw Meiko crying in front of me. Her hair was completely windblown and her dress a total mess. She looked at me as though I was her only hope and collapsed to the ground still sobbing.

"M-Meiko? What on eart-,"

"Gods Len! It's Rin, I can't find her and the ships almost about to land. I searched everywhere for her but all to no avail. I even asked some of the crew if they saw her b-but- where could she be Len. Some of them said that maybe she jumped ship but I doubt Rin was the suicidal type. " She panicked but I was too stunned to speak. For Meiko to break down like this…goes to show how much she cares for Rin.

_Unlike you_

I shoved the thoughts away and helped Meiko up. I care for Rin too, I care for her so much that I had to tell her the truth- to save her, to let her know that she had to let go…

"Len…did something happen between you and Rin. Did she tell you? There's no way Rin would run off like that unless-,"

"We talked Meiko and yes, she told me but I…I rejected her. She had to know Meiko, she had to let go." I interjected and in turn received a slap from Meiko. It stung but I didn't feel surprised. I knew it was coming after all.

"You could never understand Meiko…how painful it was to tell your friend those words. To see them break so easily. Rin and I were meant to be nothing more but friends but Rin…I ruined the bond that connected us- heh, didn't I always do…and in the end, she always suffered for it." I added and chuckled bitterly as I slammed my fist angrily to the wall. So this was how weak I was, what kind of friend am I even to her? All I do is hurt her…the smiles she gave have all turned sour because of me.

"Don't tell it to me Len, I'm not Rin. For once, stop waiting for things to move as they are. Move on your own, don't let people dictate your life for you."

"You should know that it's easier said than done right?" I reminded her but Meiko shook her head.

"Those who say that are those who are afraid to take action Len. If you really want it, you will strive for it, so stop saying that it is hard."

"Just a second ago, you raised a hand on me because I hurt Rin and yet…why are you asking for my help?" I wondered aloud. I looked at her, waiting for her reply and saw her face darken.

"I have no choice Len. Between the two of us, I am nothing compared to you…That is why, please find her. I don't want to lose another family member Len, that's why please." She begged, the sound almost like a desperate cry, before walking out of the room, not waiting for another reply.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

The scent of the ocean was the only thing trying to keep me calm.

Never before had I felt so shaken, so rattled like this. I looked at my palms and saw them tremble violently. Meiko must be worried by now; I have been gone far too long now- long enough to get Meiko panicking. Judging from where I am hiding, I doubt that she could find me; well is not that the purpose of hiding? To never be found.

I looked down at the water and wondered to myself if I jumped. It was common anyway for people to jump ship during a trip. Would anyone miss me I wonder? Would they cry even after all I have done to them; what would Meiko, Piko and Kaito think when they suddenly realize that they wasted away their time caring for me only to realize that I had just wasted it away? What about Rei, will he be angry for me deserting him, letting him think that I could be his reason and him mine, after all he's done for me?

But, most of all, what about Miku and Len?

Miku would cry no doubt. She loved me even if I loved her fiancé, just goes to show how cruel I am to her. And Len? He would shed a tear all right but only briefly…after all a friend just died. It seems enough to shed only a few tears for a friend.

"Rin!" Len shouted making me flinch but I dared not turn. How did he find me? I made sure to stay hidden, meaning even the crew men did not notice me hide here.

"_Who are you!? You are no longer the same girl I shared my life with when I was young. Your sweet smiles, that laughter that brought life to the house…Where did it go. Tell me, why are you covered in so much regret?" _Len's words echoed in my mind making me shudder.

"Stay back!" I shouted, my voice quivering and heard the footsteps stop a few feet from me. He is not supposed to be here, to see me like this, to be the person he could no longer recall.

"Rin please come down from there!" He shouted but it only made me grip the railings tighter. I heard the footsteps running towards me now but I did not move. I could not move, not when he is here to see- to think that I am going crazy. The feeling of his hands on mine snapped me back to reality, somehow without me knowing, he managed to get me down from the railing and now- I was on the ground; my tears, uncontrollable as I continued to sob.

"What on earth were you doing!? Were you really trying to kill yourself?" He shouted crossly. I looked up and saw his eyes full of concern as he held me there, trying to keep me from trying to run. His warmth so close…I didn't know if I should be happy that he held me protectively as if he was afraid to lose me or maybe because he was afraid to be tormented by his conscience because of what he had done to me.

Between the two, I no longer knew which was right or wrong.

"Look at you…this is my entire fault." Suddenly his eyes turned hazy as he murmured those words. I felt his grip tighten and then suddenly he crushed me a bear-tight hug as if afraid to let me go. Seemed ironic for him to hug me like this when just last I night I did the very same thing and yet he pulled away. I wanted to push him away and show him what I felt and yet I could not do it. Even if I wanted to hate him, I could never do it-

Because no matter how much I denied it, I was too much in love with him.

"You can hit me for all I care Rin but I don't care. You're safe and sound and that's that."

"You know very well that I could never hit you Len. But I still hate you; hate you so much I want you to suffer." I saw his eyes grow wide and I quickly pulled away from him.

"Damn it Len! Why do you torment me like this? Are you happy to see me suffer? And when I'm at the depths of hell, you come along like a knight in shining armour, ready to save me then stab me at the back when it's all going wrong." I cried in agony.

"Shut up! Look at me Rin! Look at me! Do you think I want any of this? I do not want to see you destroy yourself like this Rin. I could never stab you Rin, hell I could never even bear it to see you degrade yourself like this because of me." He said through gritted teeth, trying to control the anger and anguish from erupting.

"If you want me dead fine! If that makes you happy then I'd gladly do it."

"There you go again Len! Just how much do I even mean to you?"

"Everything!" He bellowed but I controlled the urge to slap him.

"More than Miku!?" The moment I shouted her name Len's eyes grew wide and soon he was too speechless to speak. And for that moment, I knew the answer.

"Never say things you can't keep and mean Len…Never ever do that, especially to me." Was all I said before I stormed off.

* * *

><p>I slammed the door shut and plopped myself on my bed.<p>

Yes, he valued Miku more than me. After all, she is the fiancée and I am just the friend. That is why I hated it when Len said those words. He should know that those words he said are nothing more but empty promises. He always loved making those kinds of promises to me. Always watching me writhe in agony even if he didn't mean it.

"I never should've agreed…Rei was right I should never have agreed to any of this." I muttered to myself as I started to get up and pull out my suitcase. I thought that this trip to repair those damages from before but somehow it just made things worse. Everything I try to do always goes bad.

"Rin! Are you there? Gods Rin speak up will you!" I heard Meiko's voice from the door. I stopped packing and walked to open the door.

Before I could recollect myself, Meiko pushed the door open and hugged me tightly. She looked bedraggled and her eyes bloodshot as if she'd gone mad.

"Meiko how on earth-,"

"Goodness! Thank Goodness, you are safe Rin. Gods, I didn't know what I would've done had I lost you." Meiko sniffled as while robbing the air out of me from her hug. What a cruel person have I become. To make Meiko worried this much all because I cared for no one but myself. I tried my best and hugged her back, trying to calm her down as sobbed.

"I'm so sorry for making you worry Meiko. It was cruel of me to do this to you…." I apologized, I knew it wasn't enough to make up for what I had done but with my state right now- it was the only thing I could give.

"Never do this again to me Rin! You hear me!?" She pulled me away and now started to scold me but I was not mad or upset. Because truth be told, this was the Meiko I always wanted to see and not the crying one.

"Why are you smiling? This is not a laughing matter Rin."

"Oh Meiko, I'm glad to see you are now lightening up."

"Gods Rin, I forgive you but please never do this to me again. It was a good thing Len found where you were hiding." The moment Meiko mentioned Len, the aura of the room suddenly turned cold and my face started to darken.

"Rin are you alright?"

"So you sent him to look for me…Why?" I asked her and suddenly her face turned serious.

"Because you need to settle this issue. I know I'm prying Rin but to see you suffer like that, like the world suddenly ended, I couldn't bare it. Asking for Len's help was done because I had no choice. I didn't want to ask him but between the two us- he had to because he had to settle it with you."

"I know you mean well Meiko but this is something beyond what you can comprehend."

"I know Rin but…"

"I don't want to talk it anymore Meiko." Was all I said and Meiko accepted it.

"Very well Rin, I'll accept it since it is for you to decide not me. We're about to depart so get ready okay." She just replied and got up.

"Meiko?"

"Yeah?" She turned to look at me.

"Thank you." With that Meiko smiled and turned to the door and left.

My decisions huh?

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

I glanced at the watch and then back to Meiko and Rin who were now approaching the docking point.

It seemed awkward to be next to Rin after what happened. The two hated me that much I know since they both acted as if I did not exist. Well they had the right to since I caused the trip to turn sour. That was why decided to head back to Valice when I touched land. Because right now, the only medicine Rin needed was if I wasn't there to make her suffer. I didn't want to inform them though of the whole thing, seeing as they didn't care anyways, so I decided to keep it to myself as the bridge went down and we started to file out of the ship.

One by one we all started, Meiko and Rin not to far while I walked behind them. Below the ship, I saw countless of people, their hands waving and eyes searching for any of their loved ones that were on board the ship.

"H-how, wh-when did you get here!?" The sound of Rin's voice mad me turn to their direction.

My eyes grew wide as I stared at the boy grinning as he talked with Rin and Meiko. As if sensing my presence, his honey-colour eyes turned to me and the smile on his face widens, as if I was the best thing he had seen in his life. Even if he was, my brother- to see him smile like that unnerved me in every way.

"Hello nii-sama." He bowed in respect.

"Hello to you as well…Rei."

* * *

><p>Finally done. Sorry if it's too short after all the months you had to wait…I'm sorry I could never stick to those promises about trying to update as fast as I could! Please don't kill me for it. Hoped you like the chapter and please R&amp;R :)<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	15. Forgotten Memory

******Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!****

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Fifteen<br>**

Forgotten Memory

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"Did the visit with the duke go well Rei?" I asked while taking a sip from my cup. After we had docked, Rei decided to treat us to a nearby store. Meiko and I agreed but Len excused himself, insisted that he would be the one to ready the inn for us, and walked off, which was fine with me, seeing, as I did not want him in my line of sight today after what he had done. Meiko went ahead after a few sips to see the innkeeper and left both Rei and I in our own little world.

"Rin…I don't mean to be rude but did something happen between you and nii-sama?" The moment Rei asked me, my face grew dark. I did not want him to worry after all the effort he did to get here just to see me but I did not want to break my promise by keeping secrets from him…

"And if I said there was? What would you do?" I suddenly asked and turned to him waiting for an answer.

"Punch him in the face." Rei shrugged and I frowned.

"I mean in an ethical way Rei. That option sounds like something that could land you in deep trouble." I chided and he chuckled making me turn red.

"It's not funny Rei, I don't want you both fighting because of something I stupidly did. You're siblings and I don't want to destroy that connection."

"Rin, relax I won't do anything to tarnish my _beloved _brother's name." Rei replied sarcastically, with a hint of malice emphasized on Len, and I sighed.

"Look Rin, I mean it. If he does anything to hurt you or upset you I swear I might end up hitting him even if he's my brother." Rei added, his tone serious, meaning he meant every word he said which made me worried.

If he landed in a bind because of me…I could never forgive myself.

"Aw come on Rin, cheer up! You're ruining the day here." Rei pouted. I tried to smile and act that I was fine but looking at Rei- his face showed that he was not being convinced by my acting.

"Come here." He quickly took me by the hand and dragged me out of the café.

* * *

><p>"Where are we going Rei?" I asked every time we made a turn but Rei would never turn to me and reply to my question.<p>

"Rei!" I finally said and Rei paused, causing me to nearly bump into him.

"Were here Rin!" He turned with a smile on his face and I looked behind to him to find the huge ocean before us.

Rei had taken me to a beach!

"Well, what do you think Rin, is it enough to cheer you up?" Rei asked and I smacked him playfully on the shoulder.

"Man Rei, you scared the hell out of me when you dragged me out of the café! I should be upset but…seeing as you did try to make it up to me. I forgive you." I smiled and ran to the beach. The gulls flew from above and the smell of saltwater seemed all so calming to me as I ran around playing with the water.

"Hey Rei! Aren't you joining?" I shouted when I saw him watching me from the distance. He only shook his head and still sat there. I then ran to him and half-dragged him to the water.

"Rin! Nooo!" Rei shouted but his shout was drowned by the sound of his face hitting the water.

"Now you asked for it Rin!" He chuckled and tried to drag me down as well, I tried to fight back but the sand made me slip, making me hit the water.

"Hah! Now were even." Rei laughed before he dodged the water I tried to spray at him.

How long has it been since I had this so much fun? The bright sun, the cool water, the noisy gulls- they all seemed so refreshing as if rejuvenating my worn out body. I feel thankful for having Rei here…for being there for me when I needed some fun…almost made me ashamed to accept his warmth when I for one could not give him one. Sure, he complained sometimes when he saw that I cared for Len more than him but he never hated me for not liking him back…

He accepted it even if he wished for it to be more than this, making me almost feel guilty.

"Rin! Rei! So you were the ones causing the ruckus out here!" We both turned to find Meiko running out to us. I quickly got up and ran to where she was.

"Meiko! How did you find us?"

"It's hard to miss you guys when you're shouting so loudly at the back of the inn we're staying in." Meiko replied and pointed to a huge cottage not too far from where we are. It looked worn out but I guess with a few repairs, it would look like as how it had been when it was first built.

"Meiko, care to introduce me to these young kids?" A man with long violet hair approached us. He looked about a few years older than Meiko and one thing's for sure he looked odd. Not only did his hair stand out because it was long but his outfit looked almost like he was a duke, with all that eye-catching gems and that long sword strapped to his left.

"Well if it isn't the second son of the duke of Burmyn, Gakupo." Rei bowed as he got up.

"No need for the formalities Rei, I heard about you from my Father, thank you for back then." Gakupo bowed back and then smiled when he saw the shocked expressions plastered on both my face and Meiko's.

"D-Duke, all this time I-I-," Meiko was too baffled to speak as she suddenly backed away from the Gakupo. Gakupo chuckled and turned to me making me nervous.

"You must be Rin then? I heard you from Len."

"Len?"

"Len did say that two girls were accompanying him…Seeing as the woman here is Meiko then that must mean you're Rin." He replied and looked up at the sky.

"I believe it is getting dark, you'll get sick if you don't change from those wet clothes." He finally said and helped us into the cabin.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

I was waiting by the porch when they walked up to the inn.

Rin avoided my presence and continued to walk up even after seeing the worried look I had plastered on my face. Just because we fought does not mean that I have no right to worry for her.

"Giving me the _silent treatment _isn't going to work Rin. Yes, I admit it is my fault but that does not mean you will not let me have the right to worry." I grabbed her by the arm and turned her to face me. Rei, Meiko and Gakupo looked at both of us, completely surprised.

"Why does it concern you what I do Len? Do you not have any other more pressing matters to attend to?" She retorted while giving me the glare. I returned the look as well but refused to let go of her arm. Rei came to her rescue, as always, when he tried to pry her from my grasp but I refused to budge.

"Nii-sama, may we discuss this some other time? It's not right to keep a lady cold like this right?" Rei replied and I sighed.

"I guess you're right." With that, I put my coat around her and freed her from Rei before running off with Rin in tow.

* * *

><p>"Nii-sama!" I could hear Rei shout as he followed us into the inn. I continued to climb the steps while I did my best keep Rin from prying my hands off her. I continued walking until we reached the attic and closed the door while barricading it with lots of wood and chairs. Rei continued to bang at the door while cursing but I paid no heed as I forced Rin to sit on an old stool positioned under the light.<p>

"We have nothing to discuss." She only said and tried to get up but I forced me to sit down.

"No, we have a lot of things to discuss about."

"The way I see things Rin, you are no different from me." I added taking her by surprise.

"What are you talking about; we are nothing alike at all."

"I feel sorry for my own brother for loving someone like you Rin…" It sounded like I was looking down on her but she had to know.

It was time I exorcised this demon that was destroying Rin.

"I'm sorry for Rei but it's not like I wanted him to love me." She replied rather angrily which all the more made me upset.

"Neither was it in any of my intention to make you love me as well. Looking at things Rin, do you not see how alike we are? You hate me for not loving you back don't you think that you should go check on Rei and see if he hates you for not loving him back!" I nearly shouted making her jump. It was about time we settled it, we always tried but it always ended up getting worse and worse until the fuel had become a fire we could not put out. This time I was betting on it that this would be settled right then and now.

"I know what he feels but…"

"Now you know what I feel, how can you expect someone to love you back when you corner them like that? I love you Rin but not in the way you think, stop forcing people into doing something they don't or cannot do." I leaned by the table barricading the door and sighed to myself. I wonder if she understood this, judging from the look of shock she is giving me…

"I need some time to think." She only said and tried to get up but I stopped her. He looked at me angrily but ignored it and made her sit down again.

"No running away again Rin. We'll face this and end it now."

"If it was never your intention for making me love you then those promises back then mean nothing after all." She replied.

"Promise?" I asked and watched Rin flinch and clench her fist tightly.

"No matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!" She suddenly cried taking me by surprise. How did she know of my promise with Miku?

"How did you know that?" I asked and in turn received a slap, shocking me even more.

"How could you forget Len!? Are you really that dense or maybe you're right and I'm starting to become demented."

"You made that promise to me long ago first. I was first not Miku, how could you be so forgetful! Maybe that's all I am to you after all a forgotten memory." She snapped back and pushed me aside trying to move the table out of the way.

Wait that promise was with Rin? When did I make it? How… I turned to Rin and forced her to face me again. As usual she was crying but out of anger and disappointment not pain. Just when though that this finally going right for once.

Am I really just tearing her apart because of this?

* * *

><p>I'm sooooooooo sorry this was so short and late! Man I'm so bad at making updates. I can express my gratitude for you guys for being so patient. Please R&amp;R, I need to know what you think and if there is anything you hate don't hesitate to PM me and ask. Just no flaming okay<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	16. Uncertainty of the Future

********Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID and the Song used! They all belong to their respected owners!******

* * *

><p><em><strong>Please listen to this on you tube to enjoy the story better:<strong>_

**Winter Music Box Lullaby -Anime-  
><strong>

**you(no space)tube(add the com)(slash)watch(slash)?v=UlKPtrpZoVk**

(Just delete the parentheses and exchange them with what they really mean. Man that was hard :D)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Sixteen<br>**

Uncertainty of the Future

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

I was too afraid to stop her when she finally tore the barricade and stormed past the surprised Rei.

"What did you do to her nii-sama!?" Rei shouted at me before he ran after Rin. What_ did _Ido to her I wonder? Making her suffer like this all the time…If only I was some heartless bastard and she were just some stranger then I would've brushed it aside easily and all this would have been easier to bear. But she wasn't some stranger to me and I'm not some bastard…well to others I'm not but to Rin, Rei and her friends…I'm one.

However, it was her fault, not mine, for falling in love with the wrong person in the first place. I didn't ask for any of this happen.

"I see you've made things worse, Len." Meiko's voice snapped me back to reality and I turn to find her walking towards me.

"I thought I could settle it with one go but I guess I was wrong. Now look at what I've done!" I shouted angrily not at Meiko but at myself for not being strong enough to push her back and tell her that it wasn't meant to be. How could I possibly tell her to give up when every time I look into her eyes it feels like I'm jabbing a knife deeper into her heart. I didn't want any of that for Rin, she was my friend after all. What I wanted nothing more was to make her happy.

But how can I? When_ I'm_ the one making her cry like this.

"Len…" Meiko could only give me that pitiful look while I struggled to compose myself.

"_No matter what, I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!" _Those words she said to me. I always thought that I made it to Miku, hearing it from Rin that I gave her that promise first made me sick of myself for being so cruel to her.

"To protect her and be by her side…heh, how I look at things, I've never even made one effort to do it." I said to myself as I looked out the window.

That promise…I remember it now…I wanted to be stronger for her so that she could be free of the pain she felt in the orphanage. I was weak back then, incapable of protecting anyone…Rin was always the one coming to my rescue, like a reversed story of a prince and a princess where I was the one that needed saving. Was I so cruel to take advantage of her selflessness back then by thinking that, whenever she saved me and got hurt, she'd always smile as if nothing happened? I always thought that if I became strong then I could protect everyone, even Rin…

Little did I know that I was only a weakling clad in armour.

"No matter how many apologies I give her nothing will set this right will it Meiko?" I asked Meiko, who by now was leaning by the windowsill watching the night sky.

"No, nothing will mend this Len…unless you can make Rin see that there is nothing for her in this path she chose to walk."

"But how can I Meiko? How can I look into her eyes and tell her…"

"You shouldn't be having doubts about it Len. If you're serious about it then tell her…unless-," Meiko stopped midway and glanced my way. For a split second, I thought I saw her eyes in complete shock before she shifted her gaze and looked out once again.

"I'm just wondering Len, do you doubt your marriage to Miku?" My eyes widened in surprise when she asked me the question.

"Doubt? No I don't Meiko. How can you say, let alone think of such a-,"

"Then why can't you stop her? Why are you so afraid to tell her…even if she's your friend I know you can still say it Len. So why doubt so much?" Meiko pointed out to me.

That's right, why am I so afraid of telling her? Why can't I just look her in the eye and tell her that there's nothing for her? Am I really doing what I can to tell her or am I just all talk and nothing more?

Am I leading her to a false hope or am I leading myself there?

"Are you implying that I maybe…falling for her?" I looked at Meiko and received a safe answer.

"Those are your words Len, not mine. What does your heart say?"

"I don't know Meiko! I'm so confused right now…" I slammed my fist hard on the sill and sighed angrily.

"I'm not going to break another promise Meiko; I'll push through with the engagement. I've already tore Rin apart and I'm not planning to do that to Miku too." I added but Meiko knew the moment our eyes met that deep in my heart, if I either choose the wrong or right there is no going back…

I can only protect one.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

I spun her to face me.

"Leave me alone Rei!" She tore away from me but I grabbed her firmly by the arm and embraced her tightly.

"Let go!" She struggled to break free but I held fast.

"Stop it Rin…please. Are we always going to be like this? How long can you last before the last hope goes out leaving you hopeless? Will you still be the same?" I hugged her tightly as if she was going to vanish before me.

I could almost see it now, the future for us in this world she suffers in. There is nothing in it unless she willingly takes my hand and I pull her out. But how can I? When she can't even forfeit the will to think that there's still a future for her with nii-sama.

"I'm sorry Rei…even if you made me your reason. To think you'd be so kind even after all I've done." She cried on my shoulder.

"I have no regrets Rin. I didn't give it to you because you asked, I gave it to you because I wanted to. I love you-,"

"Stop it Rei! I don't want to give you false hopes too. Only I deserve that…" She cut me off and pushed me back. I could see it in her eyes, she's slowly slipping away from me. She wanted this kind of future for us but I won't allow it. How could I? When my feelings for her are something I just can't put aside.

"I'll take those hopes then! I don't care if they vanish before me Rin. All that matters to me is the fact that at least I was able to hold it. To know that it was all real to me, no matter how small or how unreal it all was."

"Rei…I hate myself so much." She covered her face and began to cry again. I wrapped her in a warm embrace and stayed silent.

"If only I could reverse time maybe I can undo all of this so that you don't have to share my burden too." She whispered in my ear.

"I wouldn't reverse it if it were me Rin. I'd end up losing you if I did, all this time I thought that I was only a shadow, only to follow my brother's footsteps with no way out of it. And here you come, a light in my world to bring me out and tell me I could be someone different. How can I give that up Rin?" I replied to her and I felt her shiver with my response.

The uncertainty of our future with no light to guide us, we make the path to our own end.

She stopped crying now, in my embrace did she find safety? I pulled away from her slightly and I saw her blue eyes looking at my amber ones. She didn't pry away when I moved close, our lips brushing against each other under the starless sky. This was how far I was willing to give everything up for her, even my own future; I will make it like hers so that she won't walk that dreaded path alone. I will be there to catch her and carry our burden together…even if she didn't love me back…

I will still be there for her.

Because that's all I can do- love her.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

Why am I feeling this way, I wonder?

How come watching them like this feels so wrong somehow? Was it because Meiko was right about what I said? That's why I feared letting Rin know because I didn't want to lose her right before my eyes. Is this even something a friend like me should feel?

All I can do is watch and do nothing because I chose Miku. I chose Miku, because I knew it was the right way for us. Rin was better off with Rei, not me. The way he looks at her as if she was the most important thing in the world, that's what Rin needed that I failed to give her. She needed someone to pull her out of the painful world she lived in. I tried to do my best for her back then but all my actions ended in failure. Not only did I lose my friend but a special person to me as well.

"Was your decision to give up so you could save your marriage?" Meiko was next to me now, watching the two of them. I looked up at the sky and saw the clouds clear, revealing the stars that looked like fireflies dancing in the night sky.

"I didn't do it for the marriage Meiko. I did it so that I could show her that she has to give up and that there's nothing for her now with me." I replied.

"But you're not happy with it are you Len? Deep inside I can see that you're afraid of what will come with this choice because you know that there's no way out of it now." Meiko pointed out and I nodded. There was no lying now, Meiko was right…that was what I felt. That fear of the future I will create for the both of us with my choice.

I will carve out our story now, my happiness in exchange for hers. I will not back out with my choice. Miku is my light and no one else can sway me from that now. Rin will be happy with Rei and in the future, she will show that smile of hers again.

"She was very precious to me Meiko. The only thing I've done is make her cry, not something I wanted when I gained the power to be strong for once. She was my reason back then, that's why I strived to be strong. It was so I could free her from the hellish world she was put in by fate."

"Your smile for hers? Free her from this fate in exchange of your happiness, is that what you're trying to say?" Meiko asked me.

"I'm not sad Meiko. Miku will be my warmth and I will be hers. That has always been our fate from the beginning. By doing this I've freed Rin from a hope that will never be fulfilled and I will give Miku the happiness she deserves."

"Was it really fate by chance or because it was decided by your parents?"

"I cared for Miku! I nearly lost her back then and I don't want to lose her now." I retorted angrily but Meiko didn't flinch, there was no anger directed at her in my eyes and that she knew.

"You're only lying to yourself Len. Soon you'll feel the burden of it."

"Why are you forcing me to doubt Meiko? As far as I'm concer-,"

"It's because Rin wouldn't want any of this! Do you think that she wouldn't see it when the time comes? Rin's not blind Len, she'll know what you've done and I don't want her to regret more." Meiko countered at me.

"I don't want her to suffer anymore Len, I just want her to be happy." Meiko added sadly.

"Then you know that this is the only way right?" I reminded her but she didn't respond. Was it really right though? Hearing it coming from me seemed too unrealistic. Was this the only way it would end for all of us?

"I'm sorry Len, for all of this…" She finally said and without saying another word, walked back into the inn. I continued to watch their figures as they looked at each other and Rei gave her a kiss. Something inside me felt so knotted up I closed my eyes and waited for them to part.

There's no going back now, that was what I chose. This is my fate now, it has run its course too far for her to reach. Such a cruel game destiny has given us, was this all meant to be a tragedy?

"I'm so sorry…" I murmured, hoping somehow that the winds could carry it to her.

The uncertainty of our future…I fear for what fate might bring.

* * *

><p>I'm sooooooooo sorry! Two months and I give such a short chapter! Please don't kill me! I'm so bad at updates :( Please R&amp;R, I need to know what you think! If there is anything you hate don't hesitate to PM me and ask.<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	17. Troubled Thoughts

********Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID! They all belong to their respected owners!******

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><p><strong>Chapter Seventeen<br>**

Troubled Thoughts

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"Not planning on sitting with them?" Gakupo asked me.

I turned to the other table and saw Rin, Rei and Meiko eating pancakes, Meiko in between the two who were completely red. Had I not seen the events that took place last night, I might have asked them why they seemed so awkward with each other.

"No, I don't think I'll be welcomed there."

"What makes you say that? I don't think Rei's the type to ignore his brother." Gakupo replied making me chuckle.

"You don't know the half of it." I answered earning a confused look from him. I took a glance at the other table and saw all three of them completely silent. Meiko felt my gaze and turned to me with her eyebrows raised making me look away.

I guess these were one of the things I wasn't allowed to do anymore after that night- keep glancing at Rin's direction like I was expecting something.

"Hey, why are you two so quiet? Did something happen last night?" The moment the words left Meiko's mouth, the two suddenly turned a brighter shade of red making me nearly choke on my coffee.

"Are you alright, Len?" Gakupo asked me worriedly. I assured him I was fine, turned to Meiko, and saw her eyeing me as well, a look telling me to look away and mind my own business.

"I know my bounds and I plan to keep it." I say aloud making them turn to me.

"I hope you do so Len." Meiko replied and I smiled a smile so unreal even to me.

"What are you talking about?" Rei cut in and Meiko quickly shut up. He turned to me with a suspicious look and I return it with another smile much to his irritation.

"Well, with that settled, I was hoping if you could all help me." Gakupo butted in, hoping maybe somehow he could brighten up the mood that was beginning to turn foul.

"And what's that?" Rin asked while calming Rei and passing me looks. Gakupo then pulled out a folder from his coat and revealed to us a poster for an upcoming festival called the 'Fantasy Fest'.

"This is a one month festival wherein each shop would be decorating their place in accordance with a theme they are assigned with. The winner gets ten thousand gold and to be able to represent the town for the annual Winter Eve Ball." Gakupo explained, his eyes brimming with excitement.

"I don't get it Gakupo, you're the son of a Duke and all so can't you just go there?" Meiko asked him and for an instant, Gakupo's face turned red.

"I-um…" He mustered to say while turning into a much deeper shade of red.

"It's not about the money is it?" I guessed and somehow he nodded.

"I promised her that I'd come to her myself with my own hard work. This inn was literally made with my own hands not my father's money. I wanted to prove to her that-,"

"So who's the girl? She must be very _special_ then." Rei cut in before Gakupo could finish, the tone of curiosity evident in his voice while making sure to emphasize the 'special' part.

"I'm surprised you still remembered it, the _promise _with her I mean." Rei added. I felt his eyes looking at me, making me shift uncomfortably from my seat. I did my best to calm myself and tried acting completely unfazed by asking him what our theme was. Gakupo gladly answered my question, finally comfortable with the idea of discussing something other than his love life.

"Alice in Wonderland, I was planning on being the Mad Hatter. Meiko can be the Red Queen and I think Rin deserves the role of Alice. Len you're the White Rabbit and Rei's the Cheshire Cat." The moment he assigned our roles, Rin quickly turned to Gakupo with a nervous look on her face.

"M-me as Alice! I think someone else deserves the role not me." She protested. Rei smirked and gently took her hand and kissed it making her even more flustered.

"I think it suits you Rin, after all I get to be the devious cat that always leaves a smile for you." He winked making me scoff, earning a look from both of them, including Meiko who shot me a warning look.

"Endearing, dear Rei, but you do know that it was the white rabbit who unwittingly led Alice to Wonderland. Had he been selfish for once then maybe he would never have sent her there to be seen by the cat." I said and then saw Meiko cover her face with her hands, sighing in defeat.

"Well…preparations will start today so I'll leave the decorating to the girls and the heavy work to both of you boys. I'll be going to the seamstress to get our costumes ready, if you need money then there's some inside the box under my dresser." Gakupo instructed while glancing at his watch. He then excused himself and walked out to the see the tailor.

* * *

><p>"Have you gone completely mad Len?" Meiko asked me just after breakfast.<p>

"What makes you say I've gone mad? I've done nothing wrong." I reply making sure that we were beyond earshot of Rin and Rei. Meiko nearly smacked herself on the face and looked at me one more time.

"I thought you said that you'd give up your smile for hers Len? As far as I can see, it's like you want her to like you again. You said you had Miku and you love her, so why are you switching sides just when Rei confessed to her!?" She nearly shouted and then covered her mouth and glancing back, hoping none of the two heard her.

"Switching sides? I did nothing of the sort Meiko. What's wrong if I want her to like me? All I want is to get my friend back." That's right, my friend. I lost her three times now and if I make another mistake then I might never repair it. Even if I did give up my happiness for hers, I still didn't want her to think of me as a stranger. Maybe one more time, just one last chance to make up for all the things I did to her. Just to say that even if she never saw me as a friend at the very least I atoned for my errors for once.

"Is that really what you think Len? If you continue on with that lie, it won't be long until the real truth comes out." Meiko warned me.

"I can see it in your eyes after all Len. I guess Rin's persuasions are actually very effective. You're starting to fall for her and you know it. It'll be a matter of time now before you start to doubt yourself Len." She added while looking at me pitifully.

"I don't need your sympathy Meiko. I can…handle this myself." It was difficult to say that last sentence and somehow Meiko knew that. Did I really need help? I always thought Rin needed the saving.

Was I somehow wrong and that it was I who needed to be saved?

"Meiko I need help here!" Rin shouted, an indication that our conversation was over.

"Think about it." Were Meiko's last words before she went to help Rin.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"What were you talking about Meiko?" I asked her while taking a glance at Len who walked to where Rei was.

Lately Meiko and Len were always with each other, whispering about something I couldn't seem to comprehend. It was almost as if they were hiding something from me and it made me uncomfortable not knowing anything.

"Nothing Rin, it doesn't concern you." Meiko replied. Lie. When adults say that you're not part of it, it's always the opposite.

"I know you mean well Meiko but you shouldn't scold him so much. It's our problem and I don't want you to get involved." I assured her and I saw Meiko sigh in relief making me look at her suspiciously.

"I'm sorry Rin, it's just that I was so worried since you were always so down that I decided to take matters into my own hands."

"Oh…thanks for worrying about me Meiko, I appreciate it." I smiled. It was a good thing Meiko was around. I could never fathom how I'd survive like this if she weren't there to always help me when it needed it.

"That reminds me Meiko. Could you do these decorations for me? I have to go to town to buy some streamers for the roof décor." I suddenly remembered while pulling out a list of stuff to buy.

"You sure you don't want me to come with you?" She asked me but I assured her I'd be fine and grabbed a basket. I made her worry too many times now, so I took it to my own hands to do something to lessen her burden.

"I'll be back soon." I waved her good-bye and ran out to look for the store.

* * *

><p>"That will be fifty gold coins miss." I handed him the money and put the items in the basket. I glanced at the clock by the store's exit and saw that I finished quite early.<p>

"Wouldn't help to take a stop and buy some food. I'm sure Meiko and the others must be hungry." I thought to myself and inspected my wallet, checking if I still had enough money to buy food.

"Sixty-nine…eighty-two…one hundred and thirty!" I still had enough money. Now all I need to do was find a store that sold food.

Being a visitor to a foreign country meant having to ask directions from time to time. It took me several times before someone finally pointed out to me a shop that sold bread and jams. The jingle from the shop's doorbell made a woman with pink hair appear from the door behind the counter.

"Yes how may I help you?" She asked me while I took the liberty of looking through all the pastry they were selling. When I saw what I wanted I pointed out to her my choice and then began looking through the jam section.

"I'll have this and this…" I pointed out the strawberry jam and the marmalade next to it.

"Are you preparing for a party?" The girl asked me while glancing at the basket full of decorations. I nodded in reply and started explaining the whole festival and the theme we had. How I was elected to be the main role and how it made me nervous.

"Who's shop are you representing anyways?"

"Ummm…I represent the inn by the beach." I answered and saw the woman's eyes grow wide in surprise.

"Is something wrong?" I asked worriedly and the woman shook her head.

"No…but I want to ask you something. By any chance, did the owner ask for money from his family? I know it seems rude of me but you see, this festival is by hard work and-,"

"No you're wrong miss! He got all this cash by working hard in his inn. He told us he wanted to prove something to someone so I know that he'd do his best without asking for his family's help." I defended Gakupo. The woman was wrong, I know that when you care for someone you'd do whatever you can to prove to that person that you deserve their trust and love. That's why Gakupo refused any financial help from his family. He wanted to prove to that special person of his that no matter what he'd win by hard work alone.

"Did he really say that?" The woman asked me and I nodded.

"The way I see things, he did that because he wanted to prove to that person that he was a man and not some rich guy who relied only on his parent's wealth."

"I see." Was all she said and then handed me the bread and jams.

"I believe you umm…"I gave her my name and she replied and said that her name was Luka.

"Thanks for everything Rin. As a token of my gratitude, the whole thing you bought is for free." She added and handed me back the gold I paid for it.

"But…I didn't do anything."

"Oh, you did do something and I thank you for it." Was all she said and then started reminding me that my friends might be looking for me.

"Please tell him when you get back that he better make sure to win." She added one more time when I took my leave.

* * *

><p>"Do you need some help miss?" A man approached me and I shook my head.<p>

"No thanks, I can handle this on my own." I replied but thanked him nevertheless. I waited by the stop, hoping for a carriage to arrive when the sky started to darken. People started running for shelter and it didn't take long before the dark clouds suddenly brought forth rain.

"Where is a carriage when you need one!" I panicked while protecting the items from the rain that began to get stronger. I scanned the area and sighed in relief when I saw an open carriage getting close. I signalled it and hopped into the carriage, making sure not to crush the decorations and the food, before slamming the door shut.

"Thanks a lot sir. Please take me to the beach please." I said while drying myself up and making sure the items weren't getting wet by the rain. I saw the coach driver nod and then made a turn to the left.

"Umm…the beach was to the right." I added when the driver made another left turn. He didn't seem to hear me but rather the carriage seemed to be getting faster. I suddenly started panicking and tried to look out the carriage to see where he was taking me.

"No use trying to escape. At this speed, you'll get killed if you make a jump. Might as well sit down like a behaved girl you are and follow orders." The coach driver commanded. I scanned the area again and saw that we were near the exit of the town. The buildings were now replaced by bushes and trees and that's where I saw my chance. Clumps of wet leaves were positioned at the side, a perfect pillow if I jumped. I waited for the coach to get close and when it did, I got up and moved to the edge.

"Sorry sir but I'd rather die than go with the likes of you!" I shouted and jumped from the carriage. I heard the whinnying of horses and I knew that the chase had yet to begin. I quickly got up and ran into the forest, hoping somehow it'd hide me from my pursuer.

"Stop right there!" I heard him shout and I did my best to run faster. The bushes slashed at my clothes and tugged at my hair but I didn't care. I needed to find somewhere to hide and I needed it now. It was a good thing Meiko didn't come with me, at least I know that she's safe instead of running from danger here with me.

I looked up at the sky and saw a tinge of orange staining it. It'd be nightfall soon, if I could continue to outrun him long enough for night to fall, then maybe he'd give up on chasing me. I hid behind a bush and watched as the man passed me by and continued going straight. I backtracked and happened upon a huge tree with branches strong enough to carry me.

"Okay…take a deep breath and…" I tugged at the branch and then steadied my feet at the other. One, two…one, two…one, two, taking turns with my hands and feet, I managed to make it to the top and sit on one of the huge branches that overlooked the town. I looked behind me and I could see the carriage, the man still not yet back.

"Now I wait…" I leaned by the trunk and waited for the horses to move. The birds chirped at the sky and I watched as they flew to the town's direction. Looking up, I silently prayed that someone would come looking for me.

Please…help me.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"She's taking too long." Meiko worriedly said while looking at both the watch and outside. Rei shifted uncomfortably from his seat and looked outside at the sky that was beginning to darken. The door opened and we all turned to see Gakupo, his face etched in worry.

"Any news?" Meiko asked and Gakupo nodded but he didn't seem too happy, meaning it was not a good news.

"We're lucky that Rin's ribbon was very noticeable. A few villagers saw her riding an open carriage. The said it made a left turn to the beach, I asked some shops nearby and they said it made another left turn _away _from the inn." Gakupo recounted. The news clung to the air like a suffocating gas. Rin…kidnapped. It seemed too hard to believe but this was a foreign town we're dealing with. There was always a possibility and it made me mad thinking about it.

Why hadn't I done anything? Maybe I was so focused into proving to Meiko that I could forget those feelings and walk away. Look what happened though, Rin was gone…taken elsewhere and I could only sit here and do nothing for her.

"She must've at least escaped somehow! Did you talk with the authorities?" Rei asked and Gakupo again nodded and pulled out a torn white ribbon from his pocket.

"They found it not too far from the forest just a few meters away from town. They also apprehended a man who the folks said escorted her out of town." Gakupo narrated and I saw Rei's eyes grow wide when he saw the torn ribbon. No mistaking it, that belonged to Rin…a gift from Rei as I recalled.

"Did he confess Gakupo? What on earth did he do to her!" Rei asked through gritted teeth before bursting out in a fit of anger. Luckily, Gakupo didn't feel the intensity and continued to discuss about the event that took place.

"He confessed when they found Rin's wallet and stuff in the carriage, he stated that she ran into the forest and he lost sight of her not too long after." Forest…not too far from town? Then he was heading for the docks, a perfect place to transport kidnapped people.

She must be lost then…hiding in fear, that's why no one could find her. A forest that big would be too difficult to comb out. If night falls, then she'd be exposed to more dangers…

'_Help me…' _The memory was so vivid like it was right before my eyes. I need to help her before it's too late.

"I'll be back soon." I didn't wait for their reply and made a mad dash to the door. The night air made me even more worried as I ran to the stop and hopped into a carriage. I felt another person enter and I saw Rei sitting next to me, Rin's ribbon inside his breast pocket.

"What one earth-,"

"No more questions nii-sama. Rin needs help and I know you'll need all the help you can get." Rei cut me off. I continued to stare at him and then nodded in reply. I realized that I'm not the only who cares for her. Even Rei would willingly cross the globe just to see her safe…this was how far his feelings were for Rin and it made me both happy and…jealous.

I mentally slapped myself and shook my head. I'd have done the same to Miku right? I would do anything to see her safe and yet here I am. I-

Would I really have done the same?

"I'm counting on you brother…I don't know what I would do if something bad happened to her." Rei snapped me out and I nodded. One more time and I'll stop and end all of this. When this is over…I have to put down the rope and watch it pull to the other side. Meiko's right, it won't be long now before I can no longer escape from it…

"The town's dock please and hurry it up!" We both commanded and the coachman whipped the horses, making them gallop faster.

This'll be the last time, so please…be safe until I find you.

* * *

><p>Thank God, for the three-hour break we have! I managed to update within one month this time Thank you so much guys for supporting this story till now. Please R&amp;R! I'll do my very best this time so stay tuned.<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	18. Tune for the Lost

********Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID and the Song used! They all belong to their respected owners!******

* * *

><p><em><strong>Please listen to this on you tube to enjoy the story better:<strong>_

**Sad Violin  
><strong>

**you(no space)tube(add the com)(slash)watch(slash)**?v=oNvFPKujc5w****

(Just delete the parentheses and exchange them with what they really mean)

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER EIGHTEEN<strong>

Tune for the Lost

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I looked down and closed my eyes.

How far did I climb up? Was it enough that he finally stopped chasing me? I could hear the owls hooting not too far from where I was. That's right…it's already night time. I wonder if they're looking for me? They must be worried that I'm taking such a long time to get home.

"They'll come, I'm sure of it." I muttered to myself repeatedly but my trembling body refused to believe it. It's scary being alone, so high up where no one can see you.

The wolves howling made me grip the trunk of the tree tighter. There are times you lose faith, especially in dangerous times like these, that's why I couldn't keep calm when the sound came closer.

"_Seems to me like they already forgot about you." _I shook my head, trying to erase the thought that kept on repeating itself in my head. They're looking for me…

Aren't they?

"Don't think negatively, They're probably here calling out to me. I just can't hear them that's all." I tried saying enthusiastically but my quivering voice only made it worse.

"_How will they find you? You're so high-up they might've already missed you." _My other-self told me…that's it! They couldn't find me because I was so high up the tree. Maybe if I went a bit down then maybe-,

*Crack*

The branch cracked and I held tight while watching the only branch that could lead me down fall to the ground. Now I was really stuck up the tree and with no chance of them finding me. If I shouted, it would attract the man and no doubt he'd find me first before the others. I have to find a way for them to know where I was…

* * *

><p><strong><em>-Flashback-<em>**

"_Leeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnn!" I shouted so loudly but he didn't reply. I guess playing hide and seek in the forest wasn't such a good idea after all. _

"_I give up Len where are you!" I shouted again. The sun was setting now and I could hear the owls coming out of their holes. Where on earth is he?_

_*Whistle*_

_A soft whistling, almost like a sparrow's chirp made me look up. There I saw Len, his face grinning down at me. He whistled the tune again, jumped off the tree, and landed in front of me._

"_What do you think? Uncle Ted taught it to me." _

"_It sounds nice." I smiled letting his victory slide for a bit. _

_After all, the tune was nice to listen to._

"_What makes it neat is the fact that no one can notice it." He whistled and I nodded. He was right, I only looked up because it seemed odd that a sparrow would be chirping so happily when the sun was beginning to set. _

_*Whistle*_

_I copied the tune and Len clapped his hands in awe making me turn red._

"_Wow, you copied it so well."_

"_Not as good as yours though." I admitted but Len didn't seem to mind that remark._

"_How about we make it a secret sign. You know, like those in dad's books, it'd be helpful that when one of us gets lost then we'd know where they are!" Len suggested and I nodded._

"_That'd be a good idea."_

**_-End-_**

Len if ever you're with them…please hear this tune. I just hope that you find me before the man does.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"I think it's a good idea if we split up, that way we can cover more ground and find her." Rei suggested to me when we got down from the carriage and walked to the forest where the man said Rin had ran off to.

"Let's just hope we don't get lost Rei, it's night time so the visibility's very low." I reminded him when we reached the part where the man confessed he lost Rin.

"Nii-sama do you think she'll be fine?" Rei asked me before we split up. I assured him that there was nothing to worry about and that Rin was capable of taking care of herself. Rei replied with a soft chuckle and left me to worry about what he had said before he left.

"You know her so well brother…it almost makes me jealous."

Knew her too well? We were childhood friends that's why I know so much about her. I wanted to explain that to Rei but I knew it'd only hurt him more if I did. He was doing his best after all, to win Rin over. Didn't I want him to push further so that he could take her away? But why is it that when he said those words, instead of feeling sorry I almost felt triumphant that I had achieved something he could not.

"Is Meiko really right? Do I really doubt everything…after all these years why now?" I punched the tree hard while muttering it to myself. I've made my resolve but it's funny how it was so easily crushed by something as trivial as this.

Am I this weak?

"No…not now, we have to focus what's on hand here and that's finding Rin." I said to myself and nodded. Those thoughts would have to wait. Rin was lost here somewhere and I have to find her and bring her back safely. It doesn't matter now if what really brought me here were my troubled thoughts, what matters most right now is that she's alive and needs help.

"Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin! Where are you?" I shouted at the top of my lungs making some owls flutter out of their trees. There was no response and the night was quiet, save for the wolves howling in the night.

*Whistle*

I stopped shouting and listened for the faint sound of a bird's whistle, not an owl's hoot but a different kind of bird. The moment the familiar tune played, the memories from back then came back to me like a slap.

It was Rin whistling our secret tune.

"Rin!" I shouted the moment I was close to the sound. A huge tree towered before me and I looked up to find Rin, her face pale and her small figure hugging the tree, afraid to let go. The moment she heard my voice, she stopped whistling and looked down at me.

"Thank God Len!" She shouted hoarsely and began to cry.

"Can you come down?" I asked her and she shook her head.

"One of the branches I used as support broke so it's a bit hard." She replied but nevertheless tried her best to get down. I watched worriedly when she tried to make her way down, a few times she nearly fell and my heart leapt worriedly.

"Just a few more Rin." I coaxed her. The moment she stepped on one of the branches, the branch cracked and sent her falling.

"RIN!" I shouted so loud and ran to her just before she fell on top of me.

*Thud*

"Oof!" I fell to the ground, my body in pain as if a huge boulder fell on top of me.

"Are you alright Rin?" I mustered to look up and saw her looking at me, her blue eyes full of tears as she hit me hard and began crying.

"What took you so long!? I was so scared…" Her sobs echoed in the night. I smiled, relief washing over me when I saw her safe.

"I'm here now so stop crying okay." I patted her head, trying my best to calm her down.

"I-I-diot!" She hiccupped in defiance and I chuckled. At least she hadn't lost her hard-headed side.

"Come, everyone's looking for you. They'll be thrilled when they see you safe." I tried to get up but felt a sharp pain in my back making me tumble back down.

"Len!?"

"Haha…I guess you really were heavy." I tried to joke and winced when the pain shot up my spine. Rin fluttered to my side and helped me rest next to a tree.

"Did Rei come along? Maybe I can call him for help." Rin suggested and was about to get up when unintentionally, my hand grabbed hers. Seemed pretty cliché if you asked me, how the guy stops the girl from leaving but when you experience it yourself it suddenly becomes a different story. Rin too, seemed at a loss for words at what I did, and so stood there looking at me in both complete surprise and worry. The moment reality finally connected with me, I quickly let go of her hand and covered my face.

"Sorry…" I managed to say without stammering and watched her nod her head warily before running off. Maybe I hit something hard and it happened…I can't…after all this time…I wonder why?

Why am I suddenly feeling this way towards her?

I wonder if it was guilt or maybe a late reaction to her feelings. Either way, it only goes to show how much love I can only give…or maybe I'm incapable of true love at all. No, my feelings for Miku…and Rin…

How can I show myself to Miku now?

"Heh, never realized curses like these existed." I laugh to myself, drowning in the false happiness I created. When does one say that they have gone mad? Mad to the point that the choices you make lead to nothing but despair.

"Tell me…what have I done wrong to deserve this?" I mutter to myself. Is it taking effect? When I said to Meiko that I was willing to give up my happiness for Rin- was this the answer that was given to me?

"Len! I couldn't find Rei…do you know where he went?" Rin came back, her face covered in dirt and leaves covered her hair. She knelt next to me and apologized for being useless.

"Aren't you supposed to be mad at me right now?" I asked her and saw her eyes widen and then grow soft. Yes, it was odd I would ask such a question but I wanted to know how she felt. Such a forgiving girl Rin can be sometimes. No matter how much I trample on her, she would always forgive me. That's why I needed an answer…

"We've been friends for so long…I waited for you for ten years and for those years never did you once look my way as something more than a friend. You stabbed me so many times to the point that I could've died and yet here I am in front of you. You say I should be mad and yet I'm not. Do you know why? Well I don't either…" Her words were like daggers of guilt to me but I let her continue. I wanted to know why, after all I did, why did she still love me.

"Love is funny Len. So weak and easily consumed by jealousy to the point one could lose their minds and yet, it's the one thing keeping us alive, making us strive better for a future we want. Even if you hated me…I could never hate you Len… In the end, love can be good but at the same time cruel. To think, of all people…I'd fall for you." Her words hung like poisonous gas, robbing my lungs of air, making me suffocate. Did I realize too late?

That in that instant, I would be committing a sin that would destroy us both.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

How far would you go for someone?

There they were, facing each other as if the world consisted of no one else but them. Where did that leave me? Was I nothing more but her support when she fell? Will I fall back into nothing more but a shadow? To me she was reason but am I the same to her as well or was it all just a fantasy I wove out of desperation?

"Existence is difficult when you have nothing left to live for." I look up at the dark sky and mutter those words to myself. It's not enough to just keep surviving, to live is very different than to survive. I've always tried to survive, to fight my way out of my brother's shadow. My life had almost become like that of a machine until Rin came and showed me how to live.

To see her like this… did I truly become incapable of anything else but a support to her?

Reason, to live, to love, to be accepted. What do they mean to me now? There's nothing left…NOTHING! I clench my fist so tight I felt something wet trickle down my hands. She's right, love is such a weak thing…so easily consumed by jealousy to the point it could drive any one mad.

"If given the chance you could look at no one else but me Rin…I would say 'I love you' everyday…to make sure you always know that more than anyone else, you were the first and the last one I would love." I whisper to her and walk away from their view.

I'm no longer needed Rin. In your eyes, my role is done. You've found what you were looking for and so I have to pack up my things and go. To you this was nothing more but kindness and yet to me it was more than that. To me, the memories will always stay, like a brand that even when it healed…the wound is still there.

"I love you Rin... when we met, now and even beyond, I will always love you." I mutter one last time as I walked farther and farther away from them…from her.

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><p>I AM SO SORRY! I'm so mean, I know. For two months you all waited and here I only one chapter with only 6 pages! It's just that I need inspiration...I'm sorry for being like Len and Rin for giving false hopes here and there. I know a simple apology won't cut it. That's why I need all your help guys! It's thanks to all your moral support I could still go on! Thank you so much for all the likes and reviews. As a normal human being, I would try to do my absolute best to try and update for all the readers out there.<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	19. Different Kinds of Love and Reasons

**********Disclaimer: **I do not own VOCALOID and the Song used! They all belong to their respected owners!********

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><p><em><strong>Please listen to this on you tube to enjoy the story better:<strong>_

**Sad Lullaby - Flower of Sorrows-  
><strong>

**you(no space)tube(add the com)(slash)watch(slash)?v=sb8c9XfZUVw**

(Just delete the parentheses and exchange them with what they really mean)

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><p><strong>CHAPTER NINETEEN<strong>

Different Kinds of Love and Reasons

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

"Look at you! You look like a drowned rat." Meiko embraced me tightly when I came back with Len to the inn. Len took his seat on one of the chairs, his face contorting in pain whenever he moved. Gakupo began calling for the doctor while Meiko got me some clothes to change in after I took my bath.

Now what made me worried was that Rei was nowhere to be found.

"Hm? He went with Len to look for you. Didn't you see him?" Meiko replied when I asked her where Rei was. Len gave me the same answer when I asked him and this made me worry. Did he get lost when he and Len split up to look for me? Just when I was about to dash to the door to look for him, the inn's door opened and in came Rei, drenched in sweat and his face masked in an expression I couldn't read.

"Where have you been Rei! You had me worried sick." I scolded him, my worry getting the best of me. Rei didn't flinch but rather he looked at me with a frightening smile on his face.

"I'm glad you _at least _worried about me Rin." His smile started to falter and before I knew it, his eyes fluttered shut and he collapsed on the floor.

"Rei!?" I ran to his side and felt his temperature. He was feverish and his skin started turning pale, the colour draining from his face. I then helped him up and along with Meiko took him to his room.

"It seems he has developed a cold, he should at least get a few days rest to recover." The doctor said after examining him and prescribing some medicine. After packing, he then turned to Gakupo and Len and followed them to have Len's injury checked.

"This is my entire fault…" I blamed myself while watching Rei's sleeping figure. That's right, if I hadn't gotten lost then he and Len wouldn't be in this situation. If I wasn't always such a klutz then they wouldn't always be getting hurt for me.

"Rei wouldn't want you to worry so try and cheer up Rin." Meiko tried to assure me, I returned the assurance with a nod but deep down I knew that she was only trying to cheer me up. How can I say that everything's alright when two important people to me are hurt because of what I had done.

"I'll go get some tea Rin, a tea can always calm the nerves." Meiko suggested and left to fetch us some refreshments.

"Neh~ Rei…I'm sorry for putting you in this state. If I wasn't always getting myself into a mess then maybe you wouldn't be suffering." I said aloud, hoping Rei heard me. As if hearing my prayers, Rei's eyes fluttered opened, his honey-coloured eyes looking at me.

"Oh thank goodness you're awake Rei!" I hovered to his side, checking to see if he was all right. Rei looked at me for a long time and then before I could react, he grabbed me by the arm and pulled down next to him, our faces inches apart from each other.

"Rei?" I asked worriedly when I saw that he wasn't talking. His eyes looked unfocused when he looked at me but his grip on me was still strong. With a light chuckle, he moved his face near me, his forehead resting on mine. I could feel his fever and my eyebrows creased with worry.

"Stay here for a while longer Rin. While I still have the chance to be next to you- please stay by my side." He whispered to my ear, his breath tickling it. I could feel the colour rise and my cheeks turning pink.

"Rei, I think the fever is getting the best of you. Let me get you some water." I suggested and was about to get up when Rei pulled me down again and this time restrained me in a tight embrace. I could feel his hands on my hair and when he pulled me back; his lips claimed mine, his kiss so powerful- hungry as if seeking something.

My heart made a tap dance and my stomach felt like it was doing summersaults. I tried to pull away but Rei was too strong for me. He quickly got up and lay on top of me, his hands restraining mine. Rei looked like he was possessed or something…his eyes looked so scary it had me paralyzed. There was no softness in it…

He had completely become a different person.

"Are you scared? Sorry about that but…I'm so tired right now, not because of the cold but of the fact that no matter what I do you'll never look at me as more than a friend. Didn't you already learn enough that brother would never love you? I'm here and yet-," He stopped midway and kissed me again. I fought again, panic rising. Why is Rei doing this? I don't understand…

"Let her go!" The door to Rei's room burst open and Len came in and pried Rei off me.

"Len!" I felt Len's hand on mine and he pulled me up behind him. Rei got up from the floor and turned to look at both Len and I. His eyes grew wide and he sighed before slumping to the ground.

"Please leave…" He muttered. I was about to reason out with him but Len stopped me and pulled me out of the room.

"Are you alright? Did he hurt you?" Len asked me and I shook my head.

"But he looked conflicted Len…I just don't get it."

"He's right about one thing Rin." He muttered and then winced. It was then realization had struck me that he was still hurt and I hovered to him but he brushed me aside.

"Is it just me or…I have to go Rin. Stay away from Rei until he cools down a bit." He quickly changed what he was about to say and walked a bit farther away from me.

"And you?" I asked, worried why he was acting all distant now. His blue eyes turn to me and I felt as if there was conflicting emotions building up in it before he hid it behind a mask.

"It would be best if you stay away from me until I sort this one out." Was all he said and quickly entered his room and locked the door. Stay away? I don't get it, stay away from him until he sorted it out. Sorted out what?

"Sorted what Len!? Why can't I come to see you?" I run to the door and began banging on it, hoping he'd open it and tell me why.

Sadly, it felt like I was only deluding myself again with hope.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

It didn't take a while before Rin stopped knocking and I heard her footsteps recede off into the distance.

There it is again, that constricting feeling whenever I hurt her. I don't understand these emotions anymore. When I came to visit Rei and saw him straddling Rin on the bed, I knew that saving her was the right thing to do because I knew she didn't want it but the second emotion…the anger that was building up inside of me when I saw them like that- I didn't understand it.

"I look so pathetic right now don't I?" I say to myself and plop myself on the bed. Lately I've been having this feeling of not wanting to leave, Miku would've been worried by now because I hadn't been back for a while. With that in mind, I'd usually hop on the first ship to her but right now that wasn't the case. There are times that when it rains I feel happy because I know I can't leave yet…why don't I want to leave?

What's making me want to stay?

"It's Rin isn't it?" I wonder to myself and sigh. Are these emotions tied to that as well? Didn't I tell her already that I didn't love her and that she had to find someone else better than me.

"You're falling for her aren't you?" I quickly get up and I see Rei, leaning by the windowsill, his face pale and his eyes hazy.

"Shouldn't you be in bed? Your fever won't go away if you keep on moving." I watch him as he walks up to a chair and sits on it while resting his feet on the desk.

"You didn't answer my question nii-sama."

"I doubt I need to answer it since you clearly know the answer."

"Should my answer be 'Of course no, since you have Miku' or 'Yes, you do love Rin.'?" Rei's eyes turned hard and he got up and paced back and forth in front of me. I watched as he turned to me and lifted me by the collar.

"Why? Of all people, she had to fall for you! I want to believe that you have no romantic feelings towards her but every day when I see you look at her…I know for a fact that I'm only fooling myself!" He angrily said between gritted teeth.

"Rei, I think the fever's getting to you." I only said and he pushes me back but I make no attempt to counter him.

Because deep down, I know that what he's telling me is all the truth.

"It makes me wonder if you're only using Miku as a scapegoat to free yourself from the guilt that you fell for Rin when it was too late. You think you can force to love someone else but it's not that simple." He continued talking and I only sit there to listen, I can't argue because what he's saying is the truth and it's only going to eat me up if I try to pretend that it was some awful joke.

"If I told you that you were right Rei, would you stop me?" I ask him and I saw his face darken.

"I wish I could but…it would mean hurting her and I didn't want that." He whispered, barely loud enough for me to hear and then he turned to me with a pained expression before walking out to the window and into his room.

He left me there with those words hanging in the air. To think that he was that self-sacrificing…when I, on the other hand, have always done whatever I could to get what I want, without giving any notice to those who I would harm because of it. If I chose Rin, it'd mean abandoning Miku- the one who I first loved…But then if I chose Miku, it would be giving up whatever I had for Rin right now …

Would I be able to save her by not loving her though?

*Knock* *Knock*

A knock from my door snaps me from my thoughts and I get up to open it, there before me was a tray of food and next to it a card that had Rin's handwriting on it. I then look to the left and I see that she too had left something for Rei but it seems that he didn't open his door to get it. I pick up the tray with one hand, trying to hide the pain from my back, and closed the door behind me. I then open the card and read the contents of it.

_You and Rei didn't come down to eat…if it was my fault then I apologize for it. Meiko insisted that you two needed rest but I wanted to at least try to help you both. I know I might've caused a lot of problems but you're both brothers right? Please don't fight any more than this. _

_I hope you both get better soon…_

_-Rin_

I frown at the card and close it. Was she blaming herself that Rei and I were fighting? Though I admit that she was involved, we didn't even put it to mind that she was the one who caused our little argument. Even Rei would agree if he read this. Why would she say that it was her fault? The urge to talk to her was strong but I did my best to fight it. If I walked out right now, without sorting my feelings, then it'd only confuse us more. I didn't want giving her any more false hopes or promises because of my recklessness. I love her but…

If I showed it or even said it, then I'd only be putting fuel to a fire I know I can never stop.

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I wonder if they both read the card?

It was a last minute decision. I know that they'd never let me in so this was the only plan I could think of. I took a peek and saw Len take the tray and close his door, at least he heard me. I looked at Rei's door and noticed that he had refused to open it even after I knocked on it many times. I knew he didn't want me around him for now and Len had strictly told me not to talk to him until he cooled down but it worried me that he was somewhat different than a while ago. The incident a while ago was proof of that.

He said he loved me, yes I admit it was surprising, seeing as I never saw him as more than a friend. So it pained me to see him in such a state. I could never return his love and he knew that, that's why he was doing all his best to hold back and allow us to only be friends. But after Len found me in the woods…he sort of changed when he got back. His eyes back then looked so sad when he looked down on me when he toppled me on the bed. He knew what he was doing was wrong but…I could see that he just couldn't help it anymore.

"_Didn't you already learn enough that brother would never love you? I'm here and yet-,"_ His last words struck me like an arrow. I know that Len could never love me… if Miku and I were both about to fall off a cliff; no doubt he's save her first because he loved her. Rei knew of my pain, that's why he offered himself, because he loved me. Loved me to the point I could see the agony in his eyes whenever I looked away from him for even a second.

I loved them both so much but my love for both is different. Even if I repeated this to the both of them countless of time, both would always give me the answer I didn't want to hear. Nevertheless, I had to hear it, because it was the painful truth that no matter what I did, even if I were to die here right now, Len would never love me and Rei would but I would always continue to hurt him.

That much I know was how cruel life was.

I snapped back to reality when I saw Rei's door open. I watched him put his coat on and walk past the tray of food on the floor. He walked towards the window at the end of the hall and jumped out of it. I ran towards the window and I saw him gracefully land on the ground before walking off. At this hour, I wonder what he was up to? I wasted no time pondering for the answer and ran down the steps to follow him. Knowing Rei, he was bound to do something reckless again.

"Rin where are you going?" Meiko noticed me putting on my white coat. I made up an excuse of buying something and ran outside quickly before I could hear a protest. It didn't take a while before I saw his figure, walking through the cul-de-sacs of the town.

"Re-," I was about to shout when I felt a hand cover my mouth. I struggled to pry free but the grip only got tighter. I watched Rei make a turn before the figure let me go. I ran as fast as I could after Rei but the figure behind me took me by the hand and embraced me tightly, my back facing the figure.

"I'm sorry…" I heard the voice say before I felt something hard hitting me and I lost consciousness.

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><p>SORRY! I know I'm the one who made you all wait and I doubt that a simple sorry is going to be enough for that. Asking for your forgiveness is not enough to make me realize how I SUCK so bad at updates. And yet, even if I am so bad at it, you all still forgave me by continuing to support the story! Thank you so much for the reviews and likes guys!<p>

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	20. Fantasy Fest

**Disclaimer: I do not own VOCALOID. Cuz if I did then Rin and Len would be Canon :)**

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><p><strong>CHAPTER TWENTY<strong>

Fantasy Fest

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

I could feel someone stroking my hair and I opened my eyes to see the sun rising.

Where am I? Last I recall, I was running after Rei who had gone off somewhere…and then…someone grabbed me and…

What happened next?

I felt soft fingers caressing my hair and that's when I noticed that I was lying down on what looked like a bench, my head resting on someone's lap. I tried to get up but I felt the figure keeping me down.

"Just leave it like this for a while Rin." I froze when I realized that the voice belonged to Len. Is this a dream? I felt my cheeks turning red at his touch but I shook the thoughts away. Just what is Len thinking? Didn't he already say for me to let go and yet…

"I'm not dreaming am I?" I asked, earning a chuckle from Len.

"And if I said you were?" He asked me back and sighed. I guess this really is a dream- a cruel one at that.

"If this is a dream then can I wake up?"

"Why?" He asked me.

"Because this is a nightmare not a dream… I don't want you in my dreams, I want you in real life but I know that can't happen. That's why I hate this." My tone sounded bitter now. I got up to confront Len but before I could turn, the world suddenly shifted and my vision suddenly turned hazy.

"I'm sorry for making you suffer Rin…" I heard Len say before I blacked out.

* * *

><p>*Gasp*<p>

My eyes flew open and I saw myself on my bed, the curtains drawn and the birds chirping outside. Was it all really just a dream? Did Len-

"Rise and shine sleepy head!" Just as I thought of him, Len's head popped out from the doorway to greet me. He wore white rabbit ears on his head and held a gold pocket watch on his left hands. He wore a plain white long-sleeved shirt and a black sleeveless vest, paired with a yellow tie. He also wore a pair of tight black slacks and knee-high brown boots that made clacking sounds on the floorboards of my room.

"The White Hare has come to pick up Alice." He bowed and reached out his hand. Is this another dream again? I wonder to myself as I reach out my hand and Len gently gives it a light kiss. My cheeks turn red and I jerk my hand away.

Nope this is all real.

"Len where on earth are-," Meiko's voice shouts and then stops when she saw Len in my room. The Red Queen herself, Meiko is dressed in a red and black frilly dress with a gold crown on her head. She put down the long gold sceptre she held on the table and walked in my room, cursing quietly on the difficulty of entering my room due to her long poofy skirt.

"What on earth are you doing here? Gakupo's been looking for you. Hurry down and I'll get Rin dressed up." She ordered and pushed the surprised Len out of my room. She then turned to me with a smile on her face while holding up a blue dress for me to see.

"Everyone in Wonderland is waiting Alice."

I looked to the faded calendar on the desk and saw the date written today. That's right, today's the start of the 'Fantasy Fest' Gakupo was talking about. After all the hard work we did, today was the day we get to see it bear fruit. I hope Luka would see this… No doubt she'd be proud of Gakupo for doing so much just to impress her.

"Earth to Rin! If you don't hurry up then we'll never get any customers." Meiko snapped her finger in front of me before taking my hand and half-dragging me to the changing room.

"What do you mean we won't be getting any customers?" I asked her when she started undressing me from my sleeping gown.

"It's a surprise." She winked and before I could ask again, she quickly helped me into a blue and white dress that reached until my knees. I sighed at her answer and just hoped to myself that it wasn't anything I should worry about.

"Hey Meiko?"

"Hm?" She replied while tying the frilly apron on me. Should I tell her? About Rei, Len, and what had transpired last night? I doubt Len would tell Meiko about it, seeing as regardless of how much he and Rei had a rivalry, Len still cared for Rei as his brother.

"Did you ever meet anyone before Kaito?" I decided against the idea and so changed the topic instead. I saw Meiko blush from the mirror and then saw her face darken. She then proceeded to tie a blue ribbon on my head and then started to comb my hair.

"How about you? Did you ever meet anyone before Len?" She threw the question back at me and this time it was my turn to blush.

"Well I met Rei but…" The moment I remembered Rei, I quickly spun to face Meiko, surprising her. Last night Rei had a fever and I followed him out into the streets. With a fever like that, he might have collapsed…or worse.

"Thanks a lot Meiko but I have to go now- don't worry I'll be back." I waved at her and walked out of the room just in time to see Rei in an almost identical outfit as Len but instead of a black vest, he had a red one and also unlike Len, he wore a long black coat with gold linings on the side. His black cat ears blended well with his hair, making it look like they were real.

"Rei!" He perked up at my voice when I ran to greet him.

"Well, well, look who we have here- it's Alice." He bowed and that's when I noticed a long black tail poking out of his coat.

"Are you alright? You know you shouldn't be up and about when you just came from a fever." I asked worriedly. Rei only laughed making me more worried since whatever I had just said wasn't even funny.

"Of course I'm fine Rin. I should actually be asking you that question- the 'are you alright' I mean."

"Huh? I feel fine." I answered him, completely baffled as to why he would think I wasn't alright.

"Sorry about last night. I know I shouldn't have pushed my feelings on to you like that…must've been due to the fever but I know that a stupid excuse like that doesn't cut it." He turned red while scratching the back of his head.

"What are you talking- oh…" I was about to ask when the thought of lips on mine surfaced through my memories. I felt my heart begin doing tap dances and the air around us suddenly got awkward.

"You probably won't forgive me after that but I guess I deserve it for doing something like that to you."

"It's not your fault…it's all mine since I made those promises I could never keep." I shook my head. People do crazy things at the spur of the moment but I couldn't blame them, we just want to find comfort in life and when we meet someone who can offer that we feel happy. It's just sad to think that when they ask for something, we just can't seem to give them what they want after all the effort they did for us.

"Don't say that… Don't ever say it was your entire fault because truth be told I would have lost myself if I didn't meet you." Rei said through gritted teeth as he pushed me against the wall.

"R-Rei-," I fumbled to say something but bit it back. To think he was this serious when I couldn't even… No, I should know my place. My situation is completely different from Rei's.

"Rin where one earth did you- oh Rei! Did I just interrupt something?" Meiko came running out of the hallway, saw Rei had me against the wall and then blushed red and ran back to the corner of the hallway.

"P-please excuse me."

"N-no Meiko! It was a misunderstanding!" We shouted in unison, turned to each other after it and then turned a bright shade of red.

"Look who I happen to see, Alice and the cat having some quality time." I turned and saw Len walking to our direction. Rei quickly turned stiff next to me, his eyes glaring at Len.

"Well I think they make a rather sweet couple." Next to him, Gakupo commented and for a split second, I thought I saw Len frown before quickly putting up his façade. Gakupo's long black coat swayed with his movement and his tall hat, the complete imitation of the Mad Hatter's, made me wonder how he could walk with it without managing to drop it.

"It seems the Mad Hatter has made his scene." I smiled at Gakupo's direction. Gakupo gave a bow and took my hand to his lips.

"A pleasure to meet you Alice. Now if you'll excuse me, the Cheshire and I have some business to attend to." With that, Gakupo took the now confused Rei by the hand and excused himself but not before passing Len a nod that held something other than a quick excuse.

"So is our Alice ready?" Len asked me after Rei and Gakupo had finally gone downstairs.

"Ready for what?" I asked him and watched him smile as he led me down the opposite staircase.

"To enter Wonderland of course."

"Can you be a bit more specific Len?" I sighed. Len didn't answer and instead led me to the front door of the shop where I saw a lot of people crowding around it.

"You're the main star Rin. So when I asked you that if you were ready to enter Wonderland, it means that I was asking you if you were ready to greet our guests." Len smiled and that's when I saw Rei already outside the shop, acting like the Cheshire himself when he bowed to the guests while showing off the most charismatic smile he could give.

"I-I think I'm not yet ready…" I panicked and was about to back out when Len stopped me, his firm grasp stopping me from making a run upstairs.

"After all the hard work we put into this? Not a chance Rin. We promised Gakupo we'd win remember? Besides, I think the headstrong and curious Alice really becomes you so I know you'll do fine." Len assured me while at the same time reminding me of what we had promised to Gakupo. I looked behind me and saw him smiling, trying to assure me that I'd play my role well.

I blushed at thought of him so close to me, his smile as always comforted me when I felt nervous. With a weak smile, I nodded and turned to the guests who were now entering the inn. That's right, I had to make sure Gakupo won this festival. I wanted Luka to see how much he had changed because of her. How he became a person who strived to fulfil his dream with his own hands.

After all, how can this be a 'Fantasy Fest' when there is no magic to grant any wishes.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

"Welcome everyone to Wonderland!" I heard Rin shout and watched her lead the guests to their table while humming a song. I felt someone tug at my sleeve and I looked down to find a young girl looking at me.

"Why hello there young miss. What seems to be the problem?" I asked her. The girl looked left and then right and then turned to me with a very serious expression.

"It's my birthday and I want you, the Cheshire, the Hatter, the Queen and Alice to be my servants for today."

I did my best to retain my smile and then was about to tell her that it seemed impossible when I saw a shadow towering behind the girl. I looked up and saw a man in his late fifties, dressed in fine attire. The girl looked behind her and lunged to hug the man whom I presumed to be her father.

"Daddy! Just in time. I want this place closed down for my birthday party." The girl commanded and I saw her father sigh as she put her daughter down.

"Layla, didn't we have this conversation before? Today is the 'Fantasy Fest' this place is for everyone not just you. Didn't you already agree that we'd do this next time?"

"But Daddy… I can't wait any longer! Pleeeeaaaseeee!" The girl begged her father. The man did his best to calm his child but it seemed impossible seeing as she had already gone into a tantrum.

"What seems to be the matter here Len?" I turned and saw Gakupo who had just finished cleaning a table and was now walking to see what the commotion was all about. I explained to him the girl's wish and I saw him ponder at it for a moment before nodding.

"Well we could open the bar room for her. It was supposed to be a party hall when night came but I guess we can make an exception." Gakupo suggested while winking at the girl who had now stopped crying. Leave it to Gakupo I guess to find a way around things. The girl beamed and hugged Gakupo who was now taken aback at her sudden action.

"When I grow up, I am definitely going to marry you!" She squealed in delight.

"E-EH!?"

* * *

><p>"All this for a girl? Tell me what makes her that important compared to a hundred guests that we are serving right now." Rei wondered while arranging the centre room to look like a throne room for Meiko.<p>

"Her father is one of the most influential people in this town. Having him on our side will boost the stores popularity, am I right?" I asked Gakupo and saw him nod.

"Now say ah~" Rin cooed and all three of us turned to watch the young girl as she ordered Rin to feed her a cake. Meiko sipped from her tea while acting the role of the Red Queen in front of the girl.

"I want a piggyback ride next!" The girl ordered and I watch Rei moan as he walked to the girl. I saw Rin giggle and then turned to see Rei blushing. Once again, that sour feeling came creeping up, making me frown at the sight.

"Alice save me!" The girl shouted and I watched all three of them run around the bar room, laughing and enjoying the moment.

"Something the matter Len?" Gakupo asked me worriedly when he saw the look on my face. I felt Meiko's gaze land on me and I knew that she was about to say something.

"It seems the Hare has gotten a bit-," She was about to add when I cut her off.

"What makes you say that I've gotten-,"

"It's written all over your face Len. I can see it well enough and I know Rei can as well. Don't make it harder for her okay. Just…accept it." She cut me off and this time I felt like a vein had just popped.

"Ummm…guys?" Gakupo voiced out worriedly but it seemed that neither of us heard him.

"Accept what? I don't get what you are saying-,"

"Give up! Just let it go. You keep saying that you already have but you haven't. You decided right. You're happiness for hers. The more you chase after it the deeper you're digging your grave Len. If you really care then leave her! Leave Miku if you-,"

"Do you think it's easy for me to just let Miku go Meiko? If it was that easy then I'd have already left but I didn't. And you know why? It's because I still loved her…" I shouted and that's when I realized that I had just dug my grave even deeper.

"_Loved _her Len. So now you know where your heart lies." Meiko only said as she got up to leave me in shock next to a completely baffled Gakupo.

* * *

><p><strong>HIATUS!<strong> I'm sorry for the sudden announcement but it seems like the story was losing its touch. The updates keep extending from two to three months and it makes me worry that you might be waiting for nothing…

What worries me even more is the fact that another story just popped into my head. I've already started to write it down but I decided that I might not post it until I've accomplished three chapters of it. What makes it worrying for me is that when I start it I might not have the time to update 'Until the Bitter End' hence the reason why I put it into hiatus.

So thanks for those who supported this story since that day it was published. I promise that when the time comes that I can finally write it again, I'll make sure it gets posted for all of you guys to see. Till then…I guess.

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	21. Before All Could Be Said

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT I repeat DO NOT own anything!**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER TWENTY ONE<strong>

Before All Could be Said

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

After the party I resigned myself to my room and refused any visitors to come.

Could Meiko be right and I did indeed fall for Rin? Could fate be any crueler to me and Rin? No doubt I can no longer look at Rin right in the eye and force her to give up on me. I paced in my room and flopped to the bed as I stared at the ceiling.

The marriage… if I backed out no doubt it'd hurt Miku but if I didn't… No! I rose from my bed and closed my eyes. No backing out now, this is my decision and I made it final to Rin. I won't drag her any lower just when she's beginning to move on.

"Oh… Rin, I'm so sorry." I muttered to myself as I leaned by the desk that overlooked the festive city. I could hear laughter and shrieks of people having fun, the sky decorated by the bright lights of the fireworks. Even if the town looked happy… I could not even smile for it.

"Len, it's me Rin." A soft tap came from my door and I turned to find Rin standing by the doorway, her eyes regarding me with worry.

"How did you get in here? I could have sworn I locked the door."

"Well you didn't lock it so here I am."

"I said I wanted to be left alone and that includes you in the list of people not allowed here for now."

"If there is something troubling you Len, you might as well tell me." She said and I shook my head. How could I ever tell her that the trouble lay at the thought of ever telling her these feelings?

"You needn't bother yourself with me Rin. Just enjoy the festival."

"Needn't bother? We've known each other for so long Len. You should know by now that I'm not just going to leave you sulking here while I have fun." Rin huffed and grabbed me by the hand taking me by surprise.

"Let go! Where on earth are you taking me?" I retorted as Rin pulled me outside of the inn. This time it was Rin who had the iron grip. Her iron grip made it impossible for me to escape as she half-dragged me towards the beach where I saw people gathering.

"Oh would you stop struggling and look."

"I told you Rin I-," I stopped midway when a flash of light shot up from the sky. I turned and saw a splash of colored light paint the night sky. I felt Rin come closer and turned to see her smiling at the fireworks.

"Aren't they just beautiful, Len."

"Like Fire flowers in the night sky." I could only reply and smile as well at the spectacle before us. Had it been different then maybe this moment would have been more memorable for us. Sadly, I can feel nothing but a painful sensation within me as I watch the fireworks with Rin.

After all, this scene for us is nothing more but a fleeting emotion of what could have been.

* * *

><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

Regardless of the throbbing headache I had, it made me glad to finally see him smile.

I didn't know what was wrong with him but ever since the festival began, Len had been more distant and upset with almost everyone in the inn. He'd do his job and smile for the guest but there was this sense of sadness in his eyes whenever he'd look away. Did he miss Miku, I wonder? I guess it goes to show that compared to Mistress, this was all I could to make him smile. It was so easy to make him smile then… I'd just put up a silly face and he'd be laughing in seconds but right now, not even that looked like it was enough to make him smile, let alone laugh.

"I guess it's time for us to go now, Rin." Len finally said the fireworks died down and people began to walk away. I stared at the sky and closed my eyes while nodding. With the end of the festival came as well the end of our trip. Tomorrow, all of us would be sailing back to Claridan and in a few months the wedding will begin. The knot in my chest as that day came made me wince in pain. Truly, no matter what they said, I still loved him.

"Rin? Is there something wrong?" Len asked me worriedly. I refused to look at him so that he wouldn't read my eyes. Len always could read me like an open book after all. I gave him the most genuine smile I could manage to assure him I was alright regardless of the knot in my chest and headache I was having. He didn't have to worry that much about me. He should be worrying how Miku was faring right now and not some girl like me.

"If you say so… but thank you for asking me out to see the sky. It's been such a long time since we watched the sky again."

"But even now Gemini is nowhere to be found." I could only say to remind him of our future. Len remained silent to my sudden reply. Either he didn't understand what I meant or he was afraid to say anything to ruin this moment, I didn't know. I no longer knew him after all…

"It's still there, just hidden by the clouds." He finally answered, still looking up at the sky as if he was looking for any sign of it.

"Why bother to search for it? If it wants to be found then it will be found…" I added bitterly while massaging my throbbing head and saw him frown at the sky before turning to me. There it is again, the way he talked as if he wanted me to think there was even a shred of hope for me. That's why I keep hoping sometimes, because he always made it look like there was one.

'_Or maybe it's all because of me misinterpreting his mixed signals.' _I thought to myself and then shook my head and scoffed at the idea. It's not the mixed signals nor the misinterpretation. It was all because of some stupid feeling called hope. I had always been told I was too optimistic for my own good and true enough they were right… I should have realized that not everything could go your way and that there are times you'd just have to accept it and give up.

"I'm sorry…"

"Stop apologizing! I'm sick and tired of hearing it… just, just stay silent. That's all I'm asking." I answered angrily and then softened, my voice already getting tired of the repetitive arguments Len and I are always having. Even if it's just these short moments, all I want is to spend this silence with him to make me feel like the confessions and the mistakes never happened. That everything was back to the time before all the drama. So that even if my life were to be short, then at least this would be part of those times I'd never want to forget.

"Rin, I-,"

"Len!" I turned and saw a blur of blue cut off whatever Len was going to say to me with a tackle. There I saw Miku on top off Len hugging him as tight as she could. I controlled every nerve in my body to walk away and forced a smile as I greeted the Mistress.

"Len, you meanie! How could you neglect to write to me for almost three days?" Miku pouted and I saw the look of surprise on Len's face as if he wasn't expecting Miku to be here.

"Ah, Rin. There you are. Miku and I have been looking all over the inn for you guys." I turned and I saw Rei walking towards us just as Len and Miku got up from the ground.

"What are you doing here, Miku? I thought you were going to ready the orchestra for the wedding?" Len asked and once again Miku huffed like a little girl.

"Is it wrong to see you? I missed you so I came to visit the town."

"I bumped into her when I went to the town to buy some flowers with Meiko. Really, nii-sama, she was so worried when you stopped writing to her." Rei narrated and I saw Len's eyes soften making me flinch. That knot in my chest stayed there making me have to turn around so I couldn't see more. I felt a hand on mine and I looked to see Rei looking at me worriedly. Guilt and pain enveloped me and I shrugged his hand off making him flinch.

"Excuse me." I only say as I walk away to avoid the ripping sensation in my heart. I've never felt so pathetic in my life. I'm chasing after a taken person and then giving mixed signals to his own brother. I promised Rei I would be his reason but all I'm doing is hurting him… the same way Len's done to me all because of my selfishness. Everyone around me is getting hurt all because I tried to play the victim when I'm not… I'm a cruel person, that's what I am.

I hate myself so much…

I locked the door behind me and collapsed to the ground, tears streaming down my face at the thought of all of this… I should never have confessed to Len that day and I never should accepted Rei's confession. I always thought it was only right to be selfish for once, because I never had the chance to have what I wanted… but I was wrong, this is all wrong. I overstepped my boundaries and now everything is crumbling down too fast.

"If maybe, I just died then no one would be hurting." I only mumble to myself and cried until there was no more tears to shed and fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

><p>I woke up and groggily got up, leaning my body by the door as I scanned my room and walked to my bed. I could hear the sound of Miku's cheery voice from downstairs and the occasional laughter of each and every one of them. I didn't have the stomach to have breakfast, nor did I feel like going down to greet everyone. I'd only just dampen their mood with my bedraggled appearance. After all, today was a day of celebration because the inn won the Fantasy Fest. Just as promised, Gakupo and Luka finally reciprocated their feelings for each other and now they were officially an item. The look on his face that time was so happy, I didn't want to be the cause of making it sad for him today.<p>

"Rin?" A soft tap followed by Meiko's voice made me open my eyes. I stared at the door contemplating whether or not I'd open it. I didn't want her to worry but knowing Meiko, the mere fact I didn't answer her was enough to make her worry.

"I still want to sleep." I lied lamely.

"It's half past eight. You're usually the early bird among us, Rin. Please just let me in." Meiko pleaded and I sighed.

"What happened to you? Are you sick?" Meiko asked me worriedly when I finally let her in the room. I wasn't surprised with her reaction, I looked like a mess so it was only normal if she worried. I could only manage a slight shake of the head as I sat next to her by the bed.

"Is it Len?" The moment his name left her lips I shook my head quickly and curl up into a ball.

"It's not Len, nor Rei or anyone. The fault lies in me." I tried to control myself from crying again as I rocked back and forth on the bed. Meiko looked at me confusingly but nevertheless she just sat next to me, patting me gently by the back until I broke down again.

"I've been so stupid, Meiko. All this time I kept on thinking that it was only right to be selfish… even if it was only for a short time. It only seemed fair since all I ever did was give but now I know I was wrong! Now look what happened, I've made Len so confused and I'm starting to lead Rei the wrong path… Now both brothers are fighting all because of something stupid that I had done." I wailed and I felt Meiko's gentle embrace around me, her soft voice cooing me like a mother would to a crying child. Having been raised in an orphanage, I never really found a mother figure I could look up to. Maybe this was what it felt like to be caressed and be loved by a mother.

"We make mistakes, it's what makes us human. Isn't that why we do our very best to fix them?"

"But even if you did mend it… it won't be the same. The scars are still there and there's no way to fix that!" I cried softly and Meiko only hugged me tighter, trying her best to calm me down.

"Scars are what makes us human too. I believe Len and Rei would never hate you. If they did then why are they still here? It just goes to show how selfless their love is. You've been selfless about your feelings too, remember? You just got a little lost but that's why we're here, Rin. So you can find your way back to us… You're never alone, okay?" Meiko assured me as my cries faded into soft sobs and hiccups.

Never alone? I guess I was so blinded by feelings and rejections I lost sight of those around me. Meiko and the others were there just next to my heart and yet I didn't look around to see them. They too have been selfless in love it made me feel guilty about not returning it back. I looked back to Meiko, my eyes still moist but nevertheless, hugged her back.

"I'm sorry and… thank you for everything." I felt her hand on my head and saw her smile back.

"You needn't apologize, Rin. Just the mere fact you are happy assures me you're alright. It isn't like you after all to always cry and frown."

"I-I guess." I managed to say as I wiped the remaining tears in my eyes.

"Meiko…"

"Hm?"

"I've decided that maybe… it's best I-," I tried to say until the entire room spun before me. I could feel the headache from last night coming back as I collapsed to the bed, Meiko's frantic calls for help reverberating through the room.

I heard several footsteps follow before I was soon engulfed in darkness.

* * *

><p>I'm back!<p>

Sorry for the loooong break but I came here to finally finish what I started. I don't want this story to end like my Kingdom Hearts BBS fic (which I deleted, sorry for that) so I want to finish this up with a bang. Sorry for the inconsistencies, I admit my writing is rather terrible when the stories I write start to become long. I hope you'll forgive me for making you wait for such a short chapter, barely even five pages long :( but as I said, I want to finish what I started… so yeah.

Please don't forget to R&R just to let me know what you think :)

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


	22. The Truth of What I Feel

**Disclaimer: I own NOTHING! If I did then Rin and Len would be a couple and there'd be an anime of Vocaloid!**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER TWENTY TWO<strong>

The Truth of What I Feel

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><p><em><strong>~REI~<strong>_

The sound of Meiko's call for help made us scramble to the source of her voice.

It was early in the morning and we were just busy preparing for breakfast when Meiko worriedly asked us where Rin was. Truthfully, it pained me just to hear her name. I didn't know what happened between her and brother but for some odd reason, that night, she looked at me so guiltily I couldn't fathom what had caused it. I tried talking to brother but Miku's completely glued to him that I didn't want her getting involved in this.

"I find it odd how she's late at waking up." Meiko worriedly said but they all assured her that she might just be tired from last night.

"Well, I go check up on her then." She just said and walked upstairs to Rin's room. I followed her retreating figure before looking back to the table, that worried feeling still lingering. I stared at brother and watched him busily eating with Miku. The moment our eyes met, he quickly looked away as if he too had something to hide.

Why are people so dear to me hiding something from me?

That was what continued to plague my thoughts before we heard Meiko's shrill cry for help. We all ran for the stairs, me being the first to slam the door to Rin's room open. I felt every color drain from my face when I saw Meiko trying to shake Rin to wake up. Brother was next to her in minutes, reading Rin's pulse to see if she was alright. I felt Miku leave my side as she followed Gakupo to quickly call for a doctor.

"…ei! Rei!" I snapped from the mental shock I was having when I heard brother calling for me, telling me to help him get Rin into a carriage. I quickly rushed to Rin's left and grabbed her by the waist as we both hefted her up.

*Cough*

Rin coughed violently, her body doubling over with her left hand on her mouth. Blood oozed from her hands and I saw Meiko and brother turn pale. I wasted no time and lifted Rin, letting the adrenaline energize me, as I quickly made my way downstairs and to the carriage that was now waiting for us.

"Oh, dear! Rin!" Miku panicked as I lifted Rin into the carriage. Regardless of her protest, Miku had to stay with Gakupo since brother didn't want her to worry too much if the results came out. So it was Meiko, brother and I who brought Rin to the doctor. I could still feel my heart hammering from both fright and worry as I saw Rin leaning by my shoulder, her forehead perspiring as she did her best to breathe while coughing terribly. What on earth happened to her? She looked so healthy and well that I didn't think that she was this sick.

Could she have been hiding this pain all along?

"Did you know brother?" I knew it was wrong to accuse brother but if he had known then he should've at least told us about it. Brother shook his head before saying he never even knew she was hiding something as alarming as this.

"But how could you not have known? You've been with her longer, you should have at least noticed!?"

"I didn't know about this, Rei. But it upsets me that I didn't, as hypocrite as it is to you since it came out from my own mouth, believe me when I say that if I had known then I would never have put her in harm's way. All those pains I put her in… If I could turn back time then I'd rewind it back those days and stop myself for having done it."

"Ha, it _is_ funny coming from you. Why only realize it now when she's near death's door? If you really cared then all those time's she needed you, you should have been there for her not me! That's all I ever saw in her eyes… now I know why she was guilty that time. Because she was afraid of turning into you, the one who she loved so much but could never have! She didn't want me to end up like her… and yet I…I…" I clenched my hands into fists as I controlled the urge to hit him. And yet even in all of this I loved her so. I could never hate her even when she looked at me and all I saw in those eyes of hers was not me but my brother.

"I-I…" I could hear my brother fumble for the words to say but I knew he could never say it. He could never let his heart dictate his mind after all. Even if his heart screamed for what it wanted, the guilt of his wrong choice always clouded his mind. That's what I was seeing right now, even if he already had Miku, his heart still yearned for someone else.

"Stop fighting! All we have to do is focus and help Rin. It doesn't matter now who hid what. All we need is get her to medical help." Meiko shouted, her voice trembling so much as she looked at Rin. For the short time Rin stayed with them, it surprised me that Meiko had actually grown a maternal instinct on her. I didn't retort any further and instead did my best keep Rin from shivering violently, her flushed cheeks full of life now turning paler by the minute.

"I-It's all my f-fault…" She tried to say, her voice hoarse and barely audible. Brother and I stared at her in confusion, was she dreaming?

"R-Rin?" I asked worriedly while shaking her gently. She didn't react to my worried shaking as but only continued to mumble about having done the wrong thing and the like. What on earth could she be dreaming? Enough to blame herself for something…

"We've arrived…" I heard the coachman say and that was our cue to quickly jump out of the carriage and help her to the medical ward. Several people already noticed our arrival and were quick to carry Rin to a bed and roll her into the emergency room. Meiko followed suit, stating that she was Rin's guardian and followed the doctor. Seeing as brother and I weren't in any way her relatives, we stayed outside, pacing back and forth as time wore on.

_Please…_ I prayed, hoping that somehow God could hear me from the heavens.

_Let her be safe…_

* * *

><p><em><strong>~LEN~<strong>_

When the doctor came out, I thought that it was all over and everything would be fine.

It didn't matter if Rin hated me, if Rei could never forgive me, if Miku was angry at me… Actually, I didn't care anymore if the whole world wished me dead. If it meant that she would live through that ordeal then that alone would make me happy. But as always, I knew that was impossible.

"I'm sorry but we did all we could…" The doctor shook his head sadly when he told us the news. Meiko only sobbed at news, Rei's face was completely unreadable and I… I just stood there without a word coming out from my mouth.

Tuberculosis…I didn't think she hid something so big from us this whole time. The doctor found it shocking that she made it this far… being an incurable and deadly disease, not much people lived long enough. When we asked him if there was any way to prolong her life, he could only shake his head and when he stated how long she would live, I felt as if the whole world just stopped. My hands shook violently as I felt hot tears drip down my face.

Three months… that was all the time she had left before she-

"You can't be serious!? You're doctors! You're supposed to assure us not give us any more bad news." Rei argued. My expression hidden, I lifted my arm to stop Rei from doing any more and apologized to the doctor as we excused ourselves. I didn't want him to make it any worse for all of us.

"What are you doing!? I thought you cared? So wh-," Rei was about to shout but stopped. Did I look that obvious? I could feel my hands shaking uncontrollably from both shock and fear. More tears streamed my face as I inwardly cursed at all of this. I said I didn't want to make it worse, I wanted to start over. Even if we couldn't be what Rin wanted, I wanted to at least be her friend again, after all the wrong things I've done to her… it was all I could do. How is it that just when we've finally tried to make it work out, all of it suddenly comes crumbling down in the harshest way possible!?

"Curse it all!" I slammed my left fist to the wall as I rubbed the tears away. Why couldn't it have just been me? I'm the bad one here, the one who caused her all the pain so why? Why did it have to be her and not me? I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned to see Rei, he didn't look worried but there was that understanding between us. That we had to be strong, for her sake we had to.

"We promised her. To protect her and be by her side." Rei said and I felt as if the world stopped spinning from what he had just said.

* * *

><p><em>-Flashback-<em>

"_If it was never your intention for making me love you then those promises back then mean nothing after all." She replied._

"_Promise?" I asked and watched Rin flinch and clench her fist tightly._

"_No matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!" She suddenly cried taking me by surprise. How did she know of my promise with Miku?_

"_How did you know that?" I asked and in turn received a slap, shocking me even more._

"_How could you forget Len!? Are you really that dense or maybe you're right and I'm starting to become demented." _

"_You made that promise to me long ago first. I was first not Miku, how could you be so forgetful! Maybe that's all I am to you after all a forgotten memory." She snapped back and pushed me aside trying to move the table out of the way._

_**-Seven years ago-**_

"_Len stop it!" She tried to stop us. It was my usual visit to the orphanage with Father but this was one of those days. Those days where Rin was always bullied by the kids because of her connection to us. _

"_Really Rin? You're so weak, relying on the rich to protect you." Yukio taunted as he lifted me by the collar and tossed me aside like a rag doll. No matter how much I picked a fight with them, I could never be strong enough to protect her. It was so frustrating to be so weak to even protect those important me._

"_Yukio stop it! You promised you wouldn't hurt him." Rin begged as she tried to grab him by the arm to avoid him from hitting me._

"_Step aside Rin or I'll hit you first." Yukio shouted trying to shake her off. I tried to muster a weak plea for her to step aside and let Yukio hit me. If it meant protecting her then it was fine if I was the one hurting in her place_

"_Hit me all you want! I won't let you hurt Len again." She shouted angrily. _

"_Fine then, you asked for it!" Yukio slammed her to the wall and started hitting her. _

"_Rin!" I shouted as I grabbed a nearby chair and hit him with it. Yukio fell to the ground with a thud. He wasn't hurt, just unconscious. I stared at Rin's frightened figure and limped to her before taking my seat beside her._

"_You know Rin you should leave this orphanage… You're always getting bullied it makes me angry." I said as I stared at the unconscious body of Yukio. That's right, if she just left then none of this would be happening._

"_I have nowhere else to go Len…Besides; I'm used to him hitting me." She admitted wiping the blood trickling down her head. I frowned at her bleeding forehead and took out my handkerchief and wrapped it around her head._

"_Sorry for not being able to protect you Rin- Sorry for being so weak and watch you suffer." I apologized again and again and felt her hands on my head and I saw her smiling._

"_You don't have to be sorry Len- like I said; I'll protect you no matter what." She grinned. I returned the smile but looked away and towards the distant clouds. Protect me? I didn't need that, she was the one who needed to be protected from getting hurt… not me._

"_I'll change that promise Rin- When I'm old enough… I'll come back and take you away from this dreaded world. I'll take you to a world where no one can hurt you and where you'll always be happy." I mustered the courage and shouted what I felt. She looked at me rather surprised but smiled and nodded._

"_No matter what I swear I will protect you and stay by your side!" I added and made a pinkie swear with her_

"_Forever?" She wondered aloud._

"_Forever." I said with a smile_

_-End-_

* * *

><p>How could I have forgotten something so important?<p>

How much more did I dig that knife to her heart by saying I never remembered it? I promised her I would be doing the protecting but now… That's not what I'm doing right now. All I'm doing now is hurting her, maybe even ten times worse than what Yukio had been doing to her. How could I… and to think I thought I gave it to Miku first…

"I'm such a cruel person." I muttered to myself. That's right, I'm a terrible person, and I don't deserve her smile, her happiness and even that friendship I thought we could fix. Maybe… maybe if I had been more observant then I would have understoo all of it. Her pain, her anger and even her sickness. I chose Miku over and over again without even noticing that Rin all this time had been waiting because of a promise she thought I could give. I failed her and everyone. Just how much have I hurt those around me because of all the stupid decisions I made in my life?

And now she's suffering and has just three months left to live. I gave her such terrible years all because of that forgotten promise. Was that how shallow our friendship was? Was that how little I cared for her? Clenching my fist tighter, I could almost feel the skin ripping from the nails that dug into it. How little was my love for her?

I don't want to say good-bye to her like this. I want to set things right, I want her to know how much she mattered to me. That she wasn't just a blank face amongst my other friends. She was a canvas full of the most wonderful things that happened in my life. She still mattered to me as an important friend. I could never hate Miku but she could never replace Rin's position as my most important friend.

But why does it feel so wrong just saying it like that?

"_Loved her Len. So now you know where your heart lies."_ Meiko's words echoed in the innermost part of my mind and my eyes went wide.

"L-loved her?" Did I really fall for Rin? Was this what a friend would have felt? This feeling of always wanting to see her, to ask for forgiveness and hope I could make her smile again. To undo all those errors, start from the beginning and be a better person who could protect her. It was the same with Miku but why… why does it feel just right when I think of doing it for Rin? There wasn't this slightest doubt in my heart when I think of it.

Those happy times… Would I have grown to love her had Miku not come? I don't want to push Miku to the edge too and yet, it'd feel so wrong if…

"Heh…" I chuckled sadly to myself. So it's only now that realized it. How much Rin meant to me. Did I rush myself and chose the wrong one? I cared for Miku too but Rin- she…

Or could it be my feelings playing with me again just when Rin's in front of Death right now? Why did I only realize it now? Just when I might lose her… is it right for me to say that just when I lose that important person, I realize what I really feel for them. That my feelings for Rin were more than just the broken friendship I wanted to fix. Could it have been more?

Did I really love her more than just a friend?

"Len!" I spun to see Miku running to my side and enveloping me in a tight embrace.

"Please tell me the doctors are lying!? Rin she- she can't be dying!" She cried as I reluctantly hugged her back.

"It's no lie but…" I said but stopped myself. _But my love for you might have been_ I mentally hit myself and pushed her away. I deserve to suffer not Rin nor Miku. I'm the antagonist of this story and it's only right I suffer for it. I don't want either of them to suffer any more because of me.

"I'm sorry, Miku." I only say as I turn around to walk away. I felt her grab me by the arm and I turn to see her worried and panicked look.

"What on earth is going on, Len!? Why are you apologizing? None of this was your fault!"

"All of this is my fault, Miku! Had I only known, had I not made her think there was hope and now look at me… I'm making you suffer too. I don't deserve either kindness from both of you." I said as I pulled the ring off my finger and handed it to her. That's right, I also don't deserve the happiness Miku's been giving me. That kindness she possesses, someone else deserves it more than me.

And Rin?

I don't have any right… Rei would make her happy but me- I'll only drag her deeper into hell.

"L-Len? What's this all of a sudden!? Why? I don't understand? Why?" Miku sobbed, tightly holding on to me but I shook her harshly off.

"Don't you get it!? It's over, I don't deserve your kindness, and I'm not the person who could make you happy. I could never make anyone happy, all I do is make people suffer. So I've decided… Someone else would make you happy Miku but it can't be me." I only say as I walk away, the sound of Miku collapsing to the ground and crying the last thing I hear as the doors to the hospital close behind me.

I don't deserve their happiness if in exchange I could only make them feel pain.

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><p>Ugh, I'm so sorry, when was the last time I updated? November? That makes it two months since the last chapter. College has been nothing but bad news and I swear, if I could change course then I'd gladly take that opportunity! This week has been nothing but exams and it isn't even midterms yet T-T I just want to hang myself but then…who'd update the story?<p>

Luckily, I managed to update this time since I have no classes today. I know it's cruel of me to be doing this to all the cast but then what'd be the point of putting drama if there was no drama? The title is 'Until the Bitter End' so yea… expect nothing but angst throughout this story.

Summer's almost there so… plenty of time to update since my summer classes are just general subjects. Pretty easy so expect updates! Thanks for the views and please R&R to let me know what you feel.

**-xXGemini14Xx- **


	23. Confession of the Dying

**Disclaimer: I own NOTHING! If I did, then Vocaloid would already be an Anime and Rin and Len are canon :)**

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><p><strong>CHAPTER TWENTY THREE<strong>

Confession of the Dying

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><p><em><strong>~RIN~<strong>_

_Where am I?_

The whole place looked so surreal that it almost looked like a dream… but what kind of dream? I couldn't recall what happened after I collapsed, just the sound of people shouting and Meiko crying.

"Tuberculosis? Are you sure?" I could hear people talking, hushed tones as if saying it any louder than they have to would seem wrong. Tuberculosis? Why on earth are they talking about something like that? Could it be that I-,

"You can't be serious!? You're doctors! You're supposed to assure us not give us any more bad news." I could hear Rei's voice, angry and trembling. He sounded like he was scared, why is that? I tried to open my eyes but it was so difficult, as if they were glued shut. It's scary… I can't see anything but darkness. Len… Rei… Meiko… where are you?

"Three months? You really let them cling into such a hope? She barely has one and a half month left." Someone sighed as I felt the sheets being pulled up till my chest. A month and a half? Is that how long I have left to live? For some odd reason, I didn't feel like crying from sadness from the idea… but there was one thing that I did feel.

Emptiness.

"L-Len? What's this all of a sudden!? Why? I don't understand? Why?" I could hear Mistress Miku's voice crying and the sound of shuffling. Why did Mistress sound like she was distressed? Her voice so broken and sad. She mentioned Len, what did he do? I wanted to run to her side but I felt like my whole body was made of lead. I have never felt so tired in my whole life. Was it the effect of the sickness?

"Don't you get it!? It's over, I don't deserve your kindness, and I'm not the person who would make you happy. I could never make anyone happy, all I do is make people suffer. So I've decided… Someone else would make you happy Miku but it can't be me." I could hear Len argue. Why did he say such things? Didn't he love Miku… why is he just hurting her more and more? I heard the click of boots leave the hall and soon after followed by Miku wailing from despair.

"This is so unfair! Why? Why did he do it? I thought he loved me! What happened to all the promises and the future! Why am I suffering this? What did I do wrong!?" She continued to cry and I felt tears slip from my eyes. It seemed so unfair for Miku after all. I felt like this was all because of me. My own heart yearned for something I couldn't have and in exchange not only was I punished by losing him but someone else also had to bear the burden too. I didn't want that… I realized long ago that I had no choice but to accept it but it looks like I realized it too late.

"When will she awake? I don't want her to see this side of me… I love Rin very much, if she found out about this… she'll hate Len and I don't want that." I could hear Miku whisper and I felt my heart break. If she found out the truth would she be saying the same thing? If she found out I loved Len too would she take back those words and hate me. How long was I hiding such a thing from her? It felt so unfair of me.

"She could never hate you or Len, Miku. She loves you both too much to hold a grudge. Believe me… I know." I could hear Rei try to comfort her as she cried some more.

Rei… he called me his reason but I could never give him what he wanted. I could never return the same love he was giving me. Even if he said it was okay… For me it could never be okay. How much more before he breaks because of me? How much would he sacrifice for me? I didn't deserve something like that if I could never pay what was due. It hurts me to see him smile at me but underneath all of those, his heart was breaking slowly.

"Why are you crying Rin? I guess you heard them didn't you." I could hear Meiko's voice say and then felt her hand caress my head in a motherly manner. Tears streamed down my face as I opened my tired eyes to the bright light and to her face, her face full of tears and sadness.

Meiko had always been like a mother to me. Learning to live with them, I never really knew I'd meet people like them. So accepting of others and helping them as if they were family too, Meiko stepped up for me countless of times that it felt impossible to pay such a gratitude. I could never tell any of them how long I had to live, I know I didn't want them to hold on to such a sliver of hope but with all my will power I want to live long enough to treasure these last memories with them…

"Sorry for worrying everyone." I managed a weak reply and Meiko shook her head assuring me it was all going to be alright, that everything was okay even if we both knew deep down it wasn't.

"I'll call them over okay… I know Rei and Miku will be glad to see you." Meiko said as she stood up but I grabbed her sleeves to stop her. There was something amiss in what she just said, if I am right then Len he-,

"As I awoke, I overheard a little scuffle between the mistress and Len. He broke it off didn't he?" I questioned and Meiko's eyes widened for a second and then looked away from me.

"I didn't think you'd hear it but yes you're correct… they broke it off. I didn't think he'd do it though, he was adamant the first time I asked him about it so I was indeed surprised he suddenly chickened out. Does that guy even have a heart or does he enjoy wrapping you both in his fingers like some toy?"

"I-I can't blame him, Meiko. If I hadn't been so forceful on him then-,"

"Don't blame yourself, if he had indeed loved you then he would've asked you to marry him not marry some person he had half-hearted feelings for." Meiko cut me off, her eyes closed as if trying to control the anger that was clearly evident in her voice.

"I guess, you could say I love him too much to find any fault in him. I always wished I could reverse time to back then, maybe if had confessed sooner then I would've known the answer… his real feelings and then maybe we wouldn't be here right now blaming each other." I said as I fiddle with sheets of my bed. Meiko didn't say a word so I didn't know what she felt. Was she frustrated or maybe even mad that I had admitted to her that I could never hate Len for what he had done? I was about to ask for an apology before Meiko turned to me with a smile on her face taking me by surprise.

"You're right, Rin. I guess you could say that love is strong enough to make us accept the flaws in others and accept them for what they are. I guess being clouded by anger towards him, I had forgotten about such a thing. Always looking at my point of view, I never gave much thought into your feelings… Sorry, Rin."

"Thank you, Meiko." I smile back as she leaves my room to call Rei and Miku in. The two people who I unintentionally lured into this bitter cycle. If I had only a few months left to live, this would be the time to correct my wrongs. It feared me to no end that they would never forgive me that they would lash out and blame me for all this suffering but I was prepared for what was to come. At least in my deathbed, I would sleep in peace knowing that I had set things right.

"Rin!" The door to my room swung open and I was engulfed in a warm hug by Rei. His body shook in fear making me wrap my arms around him to calm him down. The sound of heels on marbles echoed my room and I felt Rei stiffen as he let go of me to face Miku who stood before us.

"Thank goodness you're alright, Rin." Miku smiled and I felt every bit of my heart shatter from the pain behind it. Her eyes looked hazy as if she hadn't gotten any sleep and her smile faltered as if she was controlling the urge not to cry. Is this how much my sin had damaged her? I controlled the stinging tears to cry out for her. Miku been so good to me all these years and what did I pay her in return? Nothing but a stab at the back. She was too good to blame me for such a sin, probably going to say that it had nothing to do with me but it did! I had every reason to be hated by her. If I had not gone after Len then maybe none of this would've happened to her.

"Is there something wrong, Rin? You look so distraught." Miku's brows creased with worry and I felt another pain as I controlled the urge not to scream and say that she had no right to look at me with those eyes… those eyes that felt like I had not committed any sin against her.

"M-Meiko… R-Rei… if for a bit, please leave us. The Mistress and I have something important to talk about." I muster to say. As if reading my intentions, Meiko stiffens but nevertheless nods and leads a confused Rei out of the room. I stared into Rei's eyes and when his eyes read mine, he knew that I was about to walk through a dangerous path right now.

"Very well." He only said and walked willingly out of the room with Meiko. I turn to Mistress and saw her looking at me confusingly, wondering what I wanted to talk to her about. I tried to calm my breathing as I uttered the words that I knew would herald the beginning of our friendship's end.

"I'm sorry, Miku."

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><p><em><strong>~MIKU~<strong>_

"I'm sorry, Miku." She apologized, her face a mixture of pain and deep regret.

"What on earth are you apologizing for, Rin? You did nothing wrong." I try my best to smile, erasing those pains of Len's abandonment for the sake of Rin's health. I didn't want her to worry, I didn't want her to hate Len for what had happened if I told her. She didn't need any more burdens now that she had only three months left to live, I want her to enjoy her last remaining moments in happiness.

"I have no right to act innocent, Miku. I have every right to bear your hatred for what I am about to tell you." Rin said, her grip on the sheets tightening. What on earth could she be talking about? What sin could she possibly be talking about? In the longest time she had been under our household, not once did she ever do anything against. In fact I should be the one bearing a sin towards her, for not being able to stop Len from kicking her out of my home after the accident.

"Rin, I should be the one apologizing. If it hadn't been for my carelessness then maybe Len-,"

"Please stop, Miku! I have no right to look like the victim here… please just hear me out." Rin cut me off, calling me by my name. She looked so guilty that it made me worried about what she was about to tell me.

"I heard… Len cancelled the engagement, didn't he?" I stiffened at her words, the memory was enough to make me shake and my eyes betrayed the hurt that threatened to overflow from my eyes. So she did know… then did it mean that her sin was because she would harbor a grudge to Len? I didn't want that, I didn't want her to hate Len because of me.

"Please don't hate Len, Rin. I didn't know why he did it but there must be a very serious reason why. So please-," I tried to reason but what startled me was the fact that she laughed bitterly at my attempt to cover up for Len's sudden cancellation of our marriage.

"Did you ever think for a second that maybe that serious reason was because of me?" She suddenly blurted out and I felt time freeze as I stared at her in surprise.

"You? Why ever would you be the cause? What aren't you telling me, Rin?" I felt my voice hitch up as tears started welling up in my eyes. No, it can't be about Rin. I trust her enough… she'd never do something like this…right?

"Did you know? That I love Len and there was a time I confessed to him my feelings. I knew it was bad to go after a taken man but I loved him ever since we had been kids, Miku. On the night he gave you that promise, I felt like I had been stabbed at the back! He made that promise to me first Miku, not you… he forgot and that was when I wanted to give up… but I couldn't. I love him too much, Miku… too much." Rin confessed and I gripped my shoulders tightly to control the urge not to scream. It was normal right, to feel this overwhelming hurt and betrayal because two of the most important people in my life had stabbed me in the back.

"It could be why he left… because maybe he-,"

"Stop! Please I don't want to hear anymore, Rin!" I closed my ears and nearly screamed as I begged her not to continue. Why? It must be some horrid lie! But why would Rin make such a joke? Did I do something wrong along the way to deserve something like this?

"I'm sorry, Miku. I know I should have never hoped, he belonged to you after all… I know you may never forgive me but I just wanted to confess all of this to finally end it. I know I have a few months left to live… heck maybe even two months left. I just didn't want to die, knowing I had caused such a grave sin towards you." Rin whispered her eyes looking afar into the distance.

"In fact, I'm quite jealous. There's still a chance for you to take him back with time. I have no time left. I'll never be able to give him the happiness you could give. Given my confession, you might think that it was lucky on my part he left you… ha! It just makes me feel so rotten and evil inside. I'm no angel… I'm the devil in disguise. I have no right to have the same happiness like you." She wept bitterly as I stared at her, my eyes watering as well. She turned to me with that worn look on her face, the face of someone nearing death's door and trying to tie up loose strings before they departed. Could I really hold such a grudge towards her? I loved her too much, like a sister and families may make mistakes against each other but… it's because we're only human right? We cannot expect to make accurate assumptions of what is good and bad. Our circumstance it just the same. I would have done the same too had I been in her shoes. After all, I loved Len just as much as Rin did.

"It's alright to hate me, Miku. People will hate when they had been lied upon. Time cannot heal trust. It is something that once destroyed could never be repaired." She said quietly and I approached her with outstretched arms and wrapped her in a long embrace that took her by surprise.

"I'll be honest… It's difficult for me to learn to forgive you but I don't hate you. Had I been in your shoes I would have done the same, believe me, I had I done it to you hence the reason we were engaged. We both love Len the same way, Rin. Sure I want him to be happy but I'm not created to judge you, I'm only human too. Only God can judge us now. I can only learn to forgive… if time will allow me." I say and I heard her sob as we stayed in that embrace.

I would be lying if I said that I forgave her then and there. Someone important to me had betrayed me… who wouldn't be hurt? I love her too… she was like a sister to me but I know things will never be the same after this day. As I get up to take my leave, the weight of Len's ring in my pocket becomes heavy. So that was what he meant when he said he didn't deserve me…

Even if I wanted to turn a blind eye to it, I couldn't deny the fact that Len had indeed fallen for Rin.

"So she finally told you then." I looked up and saw Rei, his brows creased with worry. How did Rei feel? Knowing he could never win Rin no matter what he did? That her heart belonged to Len. Did it hurt just as much that it did to me when I realized that Len's love for me was half-hearted, that it only took one confession from Rin to make our dreams for a future crumbling down?

"She did." I only say and watch Rei looking at the door to her room.

"I guess you might call this her last confession to the living before she left. I saw that look you were giving me, wondering if I had felt the same way you were feeling now. I'll be honest with you, never will this hurt leave me but what can I do? Even if I did try to win her, I would run out of time… slowly but surely, I'll lose my grasp on her. That alone numbs the pain… the fear of her imminent death, I don't know how I'll be able to go on without her." Rei covers half of his face as he sits down, the agony and fear of death evident in his eyes.

"I won't blame you to hold a grudge but I on the other hand could never hate her. My love for her is enough to blind me from seeing the flaws of her choice to be with my brother."

I watched him turn to me one last time as he too walked into the room. After all, Rin as well had something she wanted to confess to Rei before she left us. I stared on the wedding ring on my hand and close my eyes, the past happiness flooding my mind.

If I could make one wish, I hope that I could go back in time and enjoy those happy times again before all of this.

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><p>Sorry doesn't cut it! I know I promised many updates during the summer but my muse refuses to inspire me. I tried everything I could to feel inspired but I guess you could say I have such a very short attention span. I refuse to write a story just for the sake of writing that was why I had to inspire myself one way or another. Luckily it worked when I watched every Vocaloid video I could find about Rin and Len.<p>

I want to thank the people who continue to support and review this story. I know I'm not the best when it comes to updating but your constant support makes me teary-eyed at having such amazing people reading my story! I'm not going to make any promises for fast updates but I will do my best to update when I can. If my muse refuses… well I can always whack them into compliance.

I guess you could say we're nearing the story's end. Just a few more chapters and then Until the Bitter End will finally reach its heart-wrenching ending. To all those supporting this since 2012 Thank you! And for those giving this story a chance thank you so much for your undying support!

REVIEWS, COMMENTS or SUGGESTIONS! Feel free to give me some.

**-xXGemini14Xx-**


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